Wide Awake
by Lapis Love
Summary: Bonnie told it like it was and liberated herself from being the enabling friend. Free from the bonds of a toxic relationship she soon found herself ensnared in a vampire's infatuation. Set after 3x19.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This small tale was inspired by the stills from 3x21. It will be Stefonnie. I have no Bamon planned for this fic. But thank you for stopping by and showing some love.  
**

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

**The Bluffs-Mystic Falls, Virginia 5:54 A.M.**

Is it all that surprising? No. Did she want to bash someone's head into a tombstone? Yes, she did. Sigh.

Green eyes looked up towards the coming horizon as the sun's premature rays began to splinter across the sky marking it in slashes of dark purple, cobalt, red-orange, and a miniscule amount of yellow. The air was sharp, pure, and frigid and she felt it beat against her exposed skin. The last forty-eight hours didn't make a lick of sense to Bonnie and she stood on the edge of the highest cliff trying to sort it all out.

Jeremy was back. That was the first thought she could process easily enough. Her ex was back, having snuck his way into town during the dead of night. She had mixed feelings about his sudden, not so sudden arrival. She was happy that he was home again. It had never been her dream for him to crawl under a rock and die after he betrayed her with the ghost of Anna, or to put an entire continent between them. Out of sight, out of mind is what Caroline tried to tell her, but she just didn't get it. Jeremy was the first guy she took a chance on and it blew up in her face. It was yet another slight from someone she allowed herself to be vulnerable with and what did he do? Stabbed her in the back and made her feel she wasn't good enough yet again.

Taking a deep breath Bonnie then shifted her thoughts to Elena. Bitterness and resentment was still a strong, nasty taste in her mouth whenever she spared her best friend a thought. There had been a time she could say with absolute certainty that no matter what, Elena would have her back. Well, she had proven that was no longer applicable. Elena cared about people—sure, but her priorities were jacked! Okay fine, she couldn't decided which Salvatore she wanted to screw, but why did everyone else have to get dragged into their endless drama?

Upon Elena's return from Denver she had called an emergency meeting at her house. Bonnie, who really wasn't in the mood but was going through the motions showed up to offer her support. She figured it would be a nice reprieve from having to help psychos with family issues reverse spells, and stay one step ahead of permanent death. She and Caroline had arrived within seconds of each other and the two speculated on what the new drama was that was turning Elena's life into a big ball of hell.

The three girls sat down at the kitchen table hovering over steaming cups of coffee. In the center of the table was an untouched plate of pastries and brownies. Caroline and Bonnie listened intently as Elena poured her little doppelganger heart out on what went down between her and Damon.

Bonnie lost all interest in the conversation when that clown was brought into the conversation, yet she tactfully kept her mouth shut. She did, flick her eyes to Caroline, who she could tell was inwardly rolling her eyes. For months all they've listened to was: Damon did this, and Damon said that, and Damon, Damon, Damon.

Ummm, what about Stefan? Wasn't _he _the one she had been in a relationship with? The one she pledged her heart to? Hmmm.

Bonnie kept her comments to the bare minimum offering up an um-hmm, you don't say, oh, really, that's how you feel. She allowed Caroline to be the mouth piece and voice of reason, something she had gotten increasingly good at.

"We can't tell you how to feel about Damon," Caroline said. "But you need to examine all the facts and not act off your hormones. He's done more bad than good stemming way beyond just his time here." She began to check items off with her fingers. "He slept with and turned your birth mother. He used me for blood and a sex toy. He broke Jeremy's neck right in front of you, snapped Ric's neck right in front of you. Repeatedly stabbed your boyfriend. And to top it all off…" she took in a huge mountain of air. "HE'S STEFAN'S BROTHER!"

Elena bristled yet still looked conflicted as if she were willing to bush those "minor" offenses under the rug and just wing it. Bonnie had pinched the bridge of her nose, rose from the table to refill her mug. That's when the spotlight was turned on her.

"How do you feel about this, Bon?" Elena asked, her whiskey colored eyes begging for absolution.

Bonnie didn't respond until she returned to the table and took a sip of her coffee. "He's a disgusting maggot that's not fit to lick my boots. That's my opinion about Damon. You want to kiss him," she shrugged, "that's on you. They aren't my lips so in other words, I don't care. But I agree with Caroline. Examine all the facts because if you get with him you're pretty much saying eff everyone who's ever been hurt by Damon. He means more to me than any of you ever will."

Two sets of eyes stared at Bonnie. The silence that befell the room was deafening. Crushing. So much that Elena catapulted out of her seat and began to pace the room.

"I wish I could explain how I feel when I'm around him," Elena implored for understanding which she wasn't getting from the looks on her two best friends' faces. She sighed and dropped to her chair again. "I know it makes no logical sense and I know he's done terrible, horrible things to people, but when I'm with him I become a different person."

"That's all well and good," Caroline interrupted, "but what kind of person do you turn into? Does he make you want to build wells in Africa, or go help starving children in India? Does he challenge you to be a better student, sister, friend? Or does he simply set your ovaries on fire and you want him to put them out?"

Bonnie couldn't help it, she had to chuckle. God, she loved Caroline like she was her child.

Elena made a guttural noise in the back of her throat. "It's more than just wanting to sleep with him. If that's all it mounted down to, we would have done it already."

"Yeah, right," Bonnie said into her coffee cup.

Elena turned to regard her. "You don't believe me?"

Bonnie sat her cup down. "It's kind of hard to believe you when you don't believe yourself. Hey, I might be president of the Crucify Damon Salvatore fangirl club, but even I can admit he's hot. Does that mean I would put his butt out if it caught on fire to preserve his hotness," Bonnie shook her head in the negative, "does it cloud certain issues," she shrugged again, "maybe, but that's still no excuse.

"Look, I know you don't want to hurt Stefan but this back and forth, and indecisiveness _is _hurting him. In this situation if you're trying to be diplomatic without stepping on toes or crushing egos, Elena sad to say it but you're wasting time."

Caroline nodded her ascent. "I'm with Bonnie on this, Lena. The longer you drag things out, the harder it'll be to make a decision."

"I want you to answer these series of questions with the first answer to pop into your head. Ready?" Bonnie waited for Elena to nod before beginning. "Hot or cold?"

"Hot."

"Ice cream or cereal?"

"Ice cream."

"Monday or Tuesday?"

"Tuesday."

"Rihanna or Katy Perry."

"Katy Perry."

"Damon or Stefan?"

"Damon."

"Boom!" Bonnie tossed her hands in the air. Elena's eyes widened and her jaw dropped as well as Caroline's.

"Problem solved," Bonnie sighed happily and rose from her table. She reached for her purse and then patted her friend on the shoulder. "I'm so lucky I'm not in your shoes."

"W-wait," Elena sputtered and shot up from her seat. "That's not what I meant."

Bonnie turned to face Elena. "But it's what came out of your mouth."

"I only said Damon because we've been talking about him for the past hour."

"Yeah, un-hun. I'm not convinced," Bonnie said unsympathetically.

Elena looked at Caroline for some assistance but Caroline merely shook her head and speared her with a look that translated into: Don't look at me.

"No," Elena denied vehemently even as she trailed behind Bonnie who made her way to the front door. "I love Stefan."

Bonnie snatched the door open and stepped one foot out on the porch. "Yes, you've established that a long time ago that you love Stefan, but are you in love with him? He's not the same Stefan Salvatore we met last year. He's different, we're all different. People grow apart and during this you developed feelings for Damon. How hardcore they are, only you can answer that. I mean, Elena, why are you so afraid to really admit how you feel about Damon?"

Elena tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Because I know no one approves of my friendship with him. It's kind of hard to admit how you feel about someone that's pretty much hated across the board."

"Yeah, and Damon really has no one to blame for that but himself. You don't want his taint to rub off on you, I can understand that, but don't continue to drag out this tired song and dance. Either move on with or without him. But in my humble opinion, Damon doesn't deserve you. He treats you like you're a trophy to win. That's not love. That's control. And one of the things I used to admire about you was your independent spirit. You used to let nothing cage you in. Where's that girl? Where's the Elena I _used _to know? Maybe you should answer those questions first before making a decision on your romantic life."

Bonnie had walked away and went back to her side of town where she quickly discovered sleep was elusive. So hence she hopped in her car and drove around aimlessly for about an hour until she decided to head to the Bluffs.

The spray of water from the waterfall occasionally wet her face and arms. Bonnie closed her eyes and merely immersed herself in nature. When in the world did life get so dang complicated? Was it when Grams began to fill her head with tales of their family being composed of powerful Salem witches? Did it happen when she touched Stefan for the first time and felt death?

The snapping of a twig caught her attention and Bonnie spun around. At first she saw nothing but trees but then she caught sight of a silhouette drawing closer to her present location. Balling her hands into fists, Bonnie licked her lips ready to battle whoever might be approaching.

Finally after torturous moments passed, the person revealed themselves to her pea green eyes. She relaxed only infinitesimally when she realized it was Stefan.

Surprise and shock over finding her here was absent from his face. That was probably due to the fact he saw her car parked some quarter of a mile away, coupled with her smell. The two of them stared at one another not really sure what would be a proper opening.

"What are you doing here?" Bonnie finally asked.

"I could ask you the same thing," he responded flatly.

Bonnie's left eye squinted as she looked at Stefan, _really _looked at him. His shirt was wrinkled, so were his jeans which told Bonnie he probably hadn't changed in a few days. His usual, perfectly styled caramel hair was sticking out at wild, untamed angles more than likely the product of constantly running frustrated hands through his mane. Dark circles were prevalent under his leaf green eyes. And his skin appeared paler than usual. For as long as she knew Stefan she had never seen him unkempt before.

"What happened?" she demanded.

There was no change to the flatness of his eyes, yet Bonnie couldn't miss the tic going off in his jaw. "It's done. We're over."

So she chose, Bonnie thought and things didn't go in Stefan's favor.

The vampire snorted and crossed over to Bonnie. He put a noticeable amount of space between them as he looked out to the bluffs. Bonnie turned around to plant her eyes on the horizon again. She wanted to say she was sorry to hear about Elena's decision, but instinct or more to the matter, self-preservation told her that's not what Stefan wanted to hear right now. Besides it wouldn't change a doggone thing.

"I never should have come back because I knew if Damon followed me, he'd take her from me. I _knew _that. But I held on to the belief that she wasn't Katherine," he snorted again. "Why am I so weak? Ric's alter ego was right about me…I'm a hideous monster and I can't even get that right."

Well what was an appropriate response to that? No, Stefan you're an excellent, hideous monster? If that wasn't an oxymoron she didn't know what was. But something inside of Bonnie snapped.

"Get over yourself, Stefan."

His head snapped so sharply to look at her that Bonnie felt the bones in her neck protesting the movement. His eyes narrowed and he took a threatening step towards her, but stopped when he felt the burning sensation of a million needles going off in his head.

"Don't go there with me, dude," she warned. "I'm sorry that Elena broke your heart. You didn't deserve that."

Stefan swooned on his feet and blinked his eyes. His reserves were nearly depleted. He had gone three days without blood so far. Being malnourished and heartbroken while in the presence of a powerful witch was not a good or smart tactic on his part.

"I'm…sorry," he said and dropped to his knees. Bonnie's eyes widened in shock and she joined him out of habit. Bonnie hated to see anyone hurting; that was probably her Achilles Heel.

She remembered that night she spent at Klaus' working the spell to unbind his siblings lives and she saw Damon bloodied and near death. Instinct had overridden common sense to leave him hanging like a piece of rotisserie chicken. It wasn't until Klaus brutally reminded her that Damon ruthlessly killed her mother to save to Elena, and it was at that moment Bonnie recalled her hatred of him and walked out.

Blind do-gooderness was going to be her downfall, Bonnie was sure of it.

Tentatively she placed her hand on his shoulder and felt his body trembling. Silent tears coursed down his cheeks and something unfamiliar yet familiar lanced through Bonnie. She sighed and then tucked Stefan's head under her chin, resting his cheek next to her beating heart.

"I'm sorry, Stefan," she murmured quietly. "I really wanted her to be with you."

"Why? After all the stuff I've done? I'm partly responsible for your mother's death, Bonnie. Why would you feel bad for me?"

"You're right," Bonnie agreed. "I shouldn't feel bad for you. And yes the sting of my mother's death still attacks me but she left me _again_," Bonnie bit out through clenched teeth. "She made her choice, and I'm making mine. I can't just be mad at one person. I'm spreading my madness all around. Keeps you more balanced that way."

Stefan maneuvered out of her arms and stared into her eyes. "I'm_ sorry_, Bonnie, deeply sorry. I hurt you and you were one of the few people I considered a friend. What I did wasn't right."

Bonnie didn't say a word to placate him.

"I know it's going to take more than me just saying I'm sorry for things to…get better."

"Yeah, it will." Pause. "But thank you for apologizing. I never thought you would."

"I've wanted to but I guess I was hesitant because I figured you'd kill me on sight."

Bonnie smirked. "The thought did pass my mind a time or two but then I realized if I just acted off my flesh and emotions how would that make me any better than you? I'd feel better—probably yet it wouldn't change the situation. I still don't trust you."

Stefan nodded his head. Trust would have been too much to ask for. He knew that.

"So what are you going to do? Elena told you that she wants to be with Damon?"

"It wasn't as cut and dry as that," Stefan confessed. "She wasted an hour of my life running through the course of our relationship making comparisons to how she feels about Damon, before _finally _admitting she did love him. I'd heard enough by then and finally gave her my…blessing," the word dripped with disdain, "and I walked out with what pride and dignity I had left."

"Okay, wait so you don't know if she really had chosen your brother?"

"I know a you're-about-to-be-dumped speech when I hear one. What would be the point in me sticking around for the fireworks? And if she wanted to be with me, she would have run out after me. She didn't do that."

They grew quiet again.

Bonnie adjusted her position on the ground so that her feet could dangle over the edge of the cliff. Stefan followed suit.

The sun had arisen engulfing them in light. She turned to regard him. "The pain?" she asked.

"Intense," he replied.

"Are you leaving?"

He shrugged. "What reason do I have to stay?"

"You're never going to get over her, are you?"

Quiet. "I kind of feel too paralyzed to answer that right now."

Bonnie sighed and then uncharacteristic for her, reached for Stefan's hand and entwined their fingers together. The cold metal of his day walking ring dug into her skin.

Stefan stared down at their combined hands—quizzically. It had been so long since anyone offered him any kind of emotional support, so long that he began to feel displaced within his own body. He stared at Bonnie's profile wondering what was going through her mind right now. Offering him, of all creatures support after he basically did what he was notorious for, ripping through her life and destroying the trust they used to have in one another.

He didn't deserve Bonnie's kindness or the olive branch she seemed to be extending. He had taken her for granted on more than one occasion, and instead of rebuking him because of the hurt and destruction he caused in her life, she remained by his side, not judging, but simply being what he had needed for so long.

A friend.

"Don't read too much into this, Stefan," Bonnie said as if reading his thoughts. "I'm doing this for me just as much as I'm doing it for you. I'm trying to prove to myself that I'm not that vindictive bitch I was when I first learned about your kind. Your actions are what make you monstrous; I can make that distinction now. And even I know humans can be just as soulless as vampires. So we can sit here like this for as long as it takes."

Stefan continued to stare at her. That was a slight problem of his, not knowing when to look away. Bonnie didn't seem to mind. Finally, after minutes passed he finally brought his eyes back to the horizon. Who knows, he very well may survive this.

**Weeks later…**

Bonnie stared up at her ceiling. Absently she brushed the column of her neck with her fingers as her thoughts raced. A pattern started from the morning she spent talking to Stefan on the bluffs. She'd find her thoughts trailing off to him whenever she woke up in the morning and then periodically throughout the day, and then at night as she crawled into bed. She hadn't told Caroline that she spoke with Stefan and Bonnie couldn't exactly pinpoint why she felt it necessary to keep that confidential.

Elena and Damon were together—kind of. They were careful about not being seen in public together so they were being cautionary and discreet in that sense. Bonnie already knew that wouldn't last long. She knew it would only be a matter of time before Damon demanded they go public. Then Elena would really discover if her blood was red or yellow and if she could withstand the public scrutiny and backlash that was sure to follow. Because lets be real, only one type of woman dated and screwed brothers.

Bonnie for her part hadn't really had any contact with Stefan since that morning. He remained in town but moved out of the boardinghouse into another Salvatore owned property. She didn't know of its location. Stefan had stopped coming to school a long time ago and it wasn't like he needed a diploma. But she did kind of miss seeing him around campus.

And luckily for Bonnie she only had one awkward encounter with Damon. She was leaving the drug store and ran into him-literally. She didn't say a word but he muttered excuse me and they kept it moving.

Yet none of this could explain why Stefan was constantly on her brain. Sighing Bonnie propped herself up against the headboard and reached for the novel she had been reading. It was good to keep her thoughts focused on things other than a certain vampire.

Stefan had survived another lonely night. He walked through his sparsely furnished living room, a glass of blood in his hand. Shirtless and sockless, mentally he began to tabulate the things he needed to get. The only completely furnished room in the house was his bedroom.

This house which was about a third the size of the boardinghouse was cozy and isolated. It lied on two acres of surrounding woods, and his nearest neighbor was five miles away. And the best part, the house was in Matt's name. No uninvited vampires allowed.

There had never been a question about Stefan remaining in the boardinghouse. He and Damon had come to an agreement that whoever Elena picked, the other would move out to keep things from being weird and complicated. Stefan lost and promptly moved his things out. He didn't tell Damon were he was lodging and had no desire to do so. In his mind he was now an only child and would live his life that way.

Many would probably question why he chose to remain in town. Well, Mystic Falls was his home, no matter what happened it would always be his home. And if Klaus couldn't scare him off, he refused to allow Delena to do the same. Stefan snorted and took a sip of his drink.

He sat down on an overstuffed chair and listened to the sounds of the house. Even he could admit to being a little lonely but loneliness was kind of a requirement living the vampire lifestyle.

The only place where he had company was in his thoughts. And as of late they had been consumed with Bonnie. He thought of her often yet never did anything about it. So what she held his hand for an entire morning? He had done more physical acts with women in his past yet they didn't have such a profound effect on him.

Stefan cleared his throat and wondered what this all meant. Did it mean anything? Did it mean he was transferring his feelings? Or was he simply clinging to the one person who showed him kindness in months?

It was probably the latter, he resolutely told himself. Before he even realized what he was doing, he was up and on his feet, heading upstairs to his room to change.

Bonnie chuckled at a passage she just finished reading about a character being so old they had an autographed copy of the Bible when she heard a car engine roaring outside. Placing the book down, she climbed out of bed and walked to the bay window. She discreetly pushed the curtains aside and her jaw hit the floor.

Stefan walked with that lazy swagger of his towards Bonnie's front door. He hadn't been to her house in months, and was taking a chance showing up unannounced. But he knew he had made the right decision when he saw her car parked in the driveway. Stomping up the stairs, he rung the door bell and waited.

Bonnie was frozen for a minute. She quickly looked down at herself and frowned. Did she really want to answer her door dressed in a tiny Timberwolves T-shirt and her Hello Kitty pajama shorts? Not the cutest or sexiest or most dignified outfit in the world, but whatever. It was only Stefan and he's seen her with blood pouring out of her nose for goodness sake.

However, that didn't mean she didn't take a detour to her bathroom to finger comb her hair and quickly brush her teeth. She coated her lips with gloss and made sure there was no crust in her eyes before she made her way downstairs.

Stefan was about to lay on the bell again when he heard the lock click and then the door opened.

He pulled his lips into a smile he hoped was believable. "Hi."

"Hi," Bonnie said with an edge of suspicion. "What are you doing here?"

Stefan cleared his throat. "I was in the neighborhood and well…okay wait that's a lie. I wanted to see you."

Bonnie's eyes blinked rapidly as she tried to process what he just said. The only times Stefan wanted to see her was to ask for her help to do a spell to save Elena's life. For him to show up at her doorstep out of the blue wanting to see her was completely out of character for him. Yet she couldn't deny that tiny shift of giddiness that infiltrated her belly, and inwardly she rolled her eyes. Getting excited by a visit from one half of the vampire duo responsible for Abby abandoning her again was not a good thing.

"For what?" Bonnie asked.

Rubbing the back of his neck Stefan wasn't really sure what he should have expected. Bonnie was not the sort of female to easily forgive someone for a past transgression like it was no big deal. He assisted in screwing up her life and for lack of a better phrase turning her into an indentured servant, she wouldn't exactly be happy to see him on a Saturday morning.

"Nothing," he stammered. "I just wanted…I just wanted to make sure you were doing all right. We haven't spoken or seen each other since…that morning."

Bonnie nodded her head. "I'm fine. How have you been?"

Stefan nodded. "Okay. Things could always be better." Pause. "Do you want to maybe go get something to eat?"

"No," was her automatic response and Bonnie ducked her eyes a bit when she saw the disappointment on Stefan's face. "I mean, no because I'm not dressed."

"I can wait," he responded quickly.

"Umm, okay. I'll be…back. Shortly," Bonnie shut the door in his face and wondered what in the hell was she doing. She quickly went back up to her room, selected an outfit that wouldn't require ironing or said she put in any effort, hopped in the shower, and went about the rest of her morning routine.

Stefan had remained on the porch waiting for her and put his phone away when the front door opened again almost half an hour later. He swiftly looked her over and felt his non-existent pulse race. Bonnie liked wearing super tight jeans and tops with deep necklines and booties, today was no exception.

"I'm ready," she stated the obvious.

Stefan offered up another smile and the two of them walked down the steps of her porch, to his car where he opened the door for her.

Again Bonnie questioned the intelligence of her decision to spend time with Stefan. Months ago this wouldn't have been an awkward situation, but he betrayed her in the worst way a friend could betray another, and here she was about to ride off into the sunset to go eat food. Sane people didn't consort with their enemies like this.

Stefan cranked the engine and pulled away from the curb. He had a decision to make on where to take them. Feasibly he could head back to his house but then he'd have to search through his boxes for cooking utensils that he did not have. If they went to the Grill where anyone they knew was liable to show up, that would only serve to make things more awkward than they presently were.

So Stefan headed out of Mystic Falls to another small town. He looked over the console at Bonnie. Her face was hard and her leg was jumping.

"Thank you," he said to break up the silence.

"For what?"

Stefan shrugged, "For being you, no matter what."

Bonnie turned to regard him. "Being me is all I can do."

Stefan took another chance. He reached over, clasped Bonnie's hand and laced their fingers together. He waited for her rebuke but it didn't follow. Instead she tightened her grip on his hand and looked out the window at the world passing by. For the first time in a long time, Stefan felt that void inside of him shrinking. This was merely the beginning.

Chapter end.

**A/N: I've had to reload this chapter because I made some subtle changes. Thank you for giving this a shot, leaving me your thoughts, adding to your lists, etc. Love you!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Just when I thought this little fic might get overlooked to say I was overwhelmed by the response this story received is an understatement. You guys rock! Thanks for the love. **

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

This was different. Breaking bread and having general conversation instead of plotting elaborate schemes to kill vampires that always failed was sadly something she hadn't done in months. Bonnie lived in a cycle of denial. Matters and issues that she used to hold important seemed trivial in light of trying to keep her best friend from dying. Somewhere along the way Bonnie lost herself in the maelstrom. She would wake up in the morning with no clue as to who she was, what she liked to do for her own pleasure; she had even forgotten her favorite color. Everything she did, she did as the local sorceress, witch for fire with sucky benefits with possible death at every twist and turn.

Eating breakfast at a roadside diner with Stefan further drew the parallels of her old life to her current one deeper in the sand. She had asked Elena to question what happened to the girl she used to be, and Bonnie could direct those same questions at herself. What did those in her social circle see her as? Strong and beautiful but not worthy of love? A servant to nature's abominations? A shadow?

Was that how she viewed herself?

She never demanded anything from anyone and she needed to figure out why.

The denial of the passing of her old life flared whenever Stefan would ask her a question about real-world things. She had no idea what went on in the world. She didn't pay attention to any of it because at the end of the day, if it couldn't help her or lead her to finding a way to kill Klaus, it wasn't important.

Suddenly she was thrust back to the first night she ate dinner with Stefan and Elena. It had been Elena's way of drawing her two favorite people together. Bonnie hadn't been receptive at all. Something about Stefan was off, she felt it when their fingers brushed against each other, and she sensed some perversion in him. He was _wrong. _And from that moment she didn't trust him.

Then, little by little, she began to see the good in his heart. He rescued her from the underground of Fell's Church, saved her life after Damon bit her, tried to stop her from taking on Klaus during the 60's dance. In his own way, Stefan had been her protector.

And as much as he was trying to portray that he was the old Stefan she used to know, in his eyes she saw the despair he was constantly wrestling back into its cage. He was hurting and he was in pain, but he was trying to work his way through it by ignoring its existence. The last time he tried to fight his nature it nearly ended disastrously for Amber, one of the girls on the Miss Mystic Falls court. Bonnie didn't want Stefan to go through another breakdown like that again.

Because at the end of the day, he was dangerous. And when she thought about it, so was she.

They were two dangerous, sentient beings eating a wholesome breakfast surrounded by so many breakable things. The temptation to flip her switch was intoxicating.

When Bonnie discovered she could start fires with her mind she had to concentrate overtime not to set everything she stared at on fire. It was hard, battling that part of her psyche that only wanted to burn things. Some days she felt like a toddler discovering its ability to destroy because it was entertaining. She liked the way the flames danced at her beckoning. She loved the smell of fire and smoke, was addicted to it, probably, and she liked seeing things melt. If she admitted any of this out loud, she'd be branded an arsonist and subsequently committed. But having that power made her weak as well as made her strong. She was a paragon for good intentions that get muddied the further into enemy camp you find yourself in.

And that had been something Bonnie was sure she shared in common with Stefan.

To the world she might project the image of being the girl who had her stuff together, all her ducks in a row, but on the inside she was still that frightened little girl who wanted to hide in her mother's protective arms.

Bonnie cleared her throat. She didn't want to think about Abby. Thoughts of Abby really had no place here.

For Stefan, the more he talked the more he wouldn't have to think certain thoughts. The only other female he spoke about things in length to had been Lexi, and you know how that ended. Lexi was yet another woman he loved that his brother ruthlessly took from him. For the longest time Stefan couldn't comprehend why Damon hated him so much. Yes, they both loved Katherine, but it had been Katherine's choice to string the both of them along. Yes, Damon didn't want to transition into a vampire thinking Katherine had met her end, but Stefan had been the one to convince him otherwise.

No matter how many times they hurt each other it couldn't erase the fact they were brothers. Brothers who had established a bond centuries ago, while they were still human, and when they really did love each other and weren't ashamed to show it.

Now if he saw Damon in the street Stefan wasn't sure of what he might do.

The conversation stalled because Stefan and Bonnie were enshrined in different, depressing thoughts.

It wasn't until the chime of the front door bell sounded that they resumed conversations.

"You know I met Anne Rice, once," Stefan said starting a new topic.

Bonnie's eyebrows shot up resembling McDonald's golden arches. "Really? Did you tell her you were a vampire?"

Stefan sat on the edge of his chair and rested his elbows on the table. "No," he stared down at his coffee cup. "I probably would have if I met her during the height of my ripper stage where I felt I was untouchable. She's an…interesting woman to say the least. Very intelligent."

"I may have read a novel or two of hers," Bonnie admitted. Before she learned of the true existence of vampires she liked reading about them from time to time. As far as the mythos goes, at heart she was a werewolf girl. Best to keep that quiet.

Interest flashed in his eyes. "Which ones?"

"_Blood and Gold _and _Queen of the Damned_. Her books have a lot of homoeroticism in them."

"That they do, but most of the vampires she's written about go as far back as ancient Rome where that was commonplace. Trust me, I never felt inclined to share a coffin with Damon."

Bonnie snorted. "Why don't you sleep in coffins? How is it that you can eat food and have…"

She stopped her question before it tumbled out and blushed. Stefan smirked and sat back in the chair.

"Have sex?" he finished the question and felt a little thrilled that he could make Bonnie blush. That had never been an easy task. Stefan shrugged. "Our physiology is still similar to humans. I don't know all the mechanics involved, and have you tried sleeping in a coffin? It's horrible and uncomfortable."

"I can imagine."

"I can see you living in New Orleans."

Bonnie cocked her head to the side. "Because of the whole witch thing?"

"Nah," Stefan shook his head. "That has very little to do with it. It's part of it but not the entire reason. When we first met I always got the sense you were more earthy, soulful, but you downplayed it to fit in with your friends. Not a typical teenaged girl obsessed with trends, clothes, shoes, boys."

At the conclusion of Stefan's psychoanalysis Bonnie realized he had a point. For so long she felt like she was living one huge game of pretend, make believe. She used to have dreams of being able to float things, manifest things into existence with a mere thought, but when she woke up she felt ordinary. She was stuck in the middle of two friends—one who was an attention seeker, and the other who drew attention without much effort. Bonnie had to make her mark some kind of way so she became the social butterfly, encasing herself in a world of staying on top of fashion and offering up relationship advice that she got from reading Cosmo.

But at the end of the day that wasn't who she was.

Had her veneer been that transparent?

"Yeah, because I was such a nun before Jeremy happened," she snorted. "But I never knew you looked at me that way."

"It's a habit I have," he said sheepishly. "It's how I gauge who I can trust. After I revealed my secret to Elena and she wanted to tell you, I didn't stop her because she said that you could be trusted, and I believed her. I had faith that you would keep my secret."

Just then Bonnie remembered what Stefan shared with her after rescuing her from Fell's Church. He sat down some distance from her and she told him that she was scared of what he was, of what she was, and Stefan admitted he thought things would be different with her, meaning he thought she could accept what he was. Back then she didn't want to. He was a predator that needed human blood to survive. How could she ever hope to trust him?

But that night changed her opinion about him on a more positive note. Stefan had been respectful to her grandmother who made it no secret she much preferred handling business with him than Damon. And if Sheila Bennett could invite a vampire into her house, then that vampire was one Bonnie could befriend and like.

"We're so different now from back then, Stefan."

"We are. I know lately I haven't exactly been acting like I cared if I had any friends left by the end of the kill Klaus operation, but deep down I never lose insight into what's important. Having people around you that you can trust with anything. I'm glad I have your friendship back, Bonnie. I mean, do I have it back?"

Bonnie thought for a moment. Well, she could admit to not hating him with the passion of a thousand suns, and he was treating her to breakfast, and she liked talking to him.

Decision made, she replied nonchalantly, "Sure, we're friends."

Stefan's grin was contagious as they smiled at one another. "So tell me something about yourself that I don't know."

Feeling put on the spot Bonnie twisted her fingers in her lap. She thought for a moment. How long had it been since someone asked her a personal question that had nothing to do with how much power she had? Too long.

"Umm…there's a lot to cover," she answered plaintively. "We're going to be here for while."

"Then let me settle the bill and we can pick this up someplace a little more private."

To Bonnie that sounded like innuendo but she was certain Stefan didn't mean it that way. She felt herself blushing as she watched him head over to the counter to pay for their breakfast. Again she had to question what she was doing.

He was standing beside her, holding out his hand. Bonnie grabbed his proffered limb and was pulled to her feet. There bodies were so close that when she moved, her sweater brushed against his shirt. This probably wasn't conscious on his part, but his eyes began to smolder and singe her skin. Bonnie dropped her eyes to her feet.

Stefan tried not to grin triumphantly, but it was hard. He _really_ did like making her blush.

Silently they left the restaurant, lost in similar thoughts.

* * *

The rest of the week passed slowly like a turtle with a broken leg. And Bonnie found it next to impossible to keep her mind focused in school. Annoyingly her thoughts always tiptoed their way back to Saturday morning breakfast with Stefan. After he settled their bill and they left, Stefan drove back to the bluffs were they sat and talked almost until dusk. It had been just as therapeutic for her as she was sure it was for him to just sit there and have plain conversation, sharing thoughts, ideas, and snippets of their lives.

Yet as she sat across from Stefan she began to realize little things about him. He had a nice mouth. He puckered his lips whenever he became animated. His eyes changed color based on the lighting. And he was funny but it was a subtle kind of funny.

"Stop it, Bonnie," she whispered to herself as she took her seat in first period English Composition.

Elena shifted her head and stared at Bonnie quizzically. "Did you say something?"

Bonnie returned Elena's gaze and shook her head. "Nope."

Elena leaned on the arm of her desk. "Hey, since its Friday I was thinking we could go see a movie."

By "we" was Damon included? For weeks Elena had been trying to get everyone to hang out together, Damon included but it was a hook no one was biting. Just because _she _decided to be with him didn't mean everyone would accept Damon's promotion in her life. Apparently, Elena was continuing on in her denial that if they all smiled through it no one would realize they were crawling over broken glass.

Elena sensed Bonnie's hesitation and the source. She really wanted to roll her eyes and growl. It had been weeks since she spent any time with her two best friends and Damon at the same time. Elena could understand Bonnie's reason for wanting to pretend Damon no longer existed, but she had hoped that Caroline, who was probably the most resilient out of them, would have at least shown up to one of Elena's dinner invitations. She felt like she was split in two, wanting to honor her friends' stance on her relationship, and of course being there for Damon. She felt guilty because essentially he lost his brother because of her.

"Never mind," Elena retracted her offer from the table.

Bonnie sighed regrettably wishing she could be the friend Elena was in desperate need of. But it was hard to start fresh, wipe the slate clean, when there was just so much poop in the commode.

Just as Bonnie was about to respond—more like coddle Elena—someone she hadn't expected to see in this classroom again entered.

Leaf green eyes immediately spotted her out of the other twenty-six bodies in the room. Instantly a smile blossomed on Bonnie's face which was returned only a little more shyly. Elena gasped sharply and her whiskey-colored eyes enlarged.

"Stefan!" Elena said louder than she intended earning her several curious glances.

The smile on Stefan's face vanished as he walked to an empty desk in the back.

Subtlety, Bonnie glanced at Stefan over her shoulder and noticed a tic going off in his jaw as he pulled his books from his satchel and slammed them on top of the desk.

Elena whipped her head to Bonnie. "What's he doing here?"

"Apparently getting an education," Bonnie replied flippantly and grinned because Stefan snorted after hearing her comment.

This time Elena couldn't contain her eye roll and directed her attention back to Stefan. Why had seeing his handsome face been the equivalent of receiving a sharp kick to the stomach?

Stefan felt Elena's gaze locked on him like a heat seeking missile. He was tempted to look at her and show her his fangs, but instead he reached for his cell and sent Bonnie a text message.

Luckily she had her phone on vibrate and felt it tickling her side. Retrieving her unit, Bonnie opened up her text message and barked a laugh that she tried to cover up with a fake cough.

The back of Elena's neck grew hot because she had the sneaking suspicion they were making fun of her. Thankfully their teacher entered the room and slid to a stop upon seeing Stefan who had been absent for weeks.

"Mr. Salvatore," the nasally voice of Miss Carmichael said, "I hope you have a very good excuse for your prolonged absence from my class."

Everyone shifted in their seats to stare at Stefan who looked as cool as a cucumber. "Yes, I do Miss Carmichael. I had mad cow disease."

Raucous laughter ensued and Bonnie could do nothing but join in as well.

Miss Carmichael was not amused. "See me after class."

Stefan stood up from his desk and approached Miss Carmichael who stood her ground. When he was near he stared her deliberately in the eye and whispered something to her. Miss Carmichael nodded in agreement and then began class.

Elena and Bonnie exchanged glances.

Because it was Friday class droned on and on and on until finally the bell rang and there was a grand exodus out of the room. Elena lingered hoping to catch Stefan; she noticed Bonnie was taking her sweet time packing up her things as well.

Stefan was up and on his feet and had reached the door when Elena caught up with him and chanced detaining him by the sleeve of his leather jacket.

"Stefan," she began softly and waited for him to turn around to acknowledge her.

Stefan did so after closing his eyes and reopening them. He turned to face his ex. "Elena," voice flat and emotionless.

"I'm glad you're back…in school. It's good to see you."

Bonnie strolled over to them her eyes going between the ex-lovers before she slipped out into the hall. Stefan wanted to reach out and grab her and keep her there, but he didn't.

"I'll see you at lunch, Lena." Bonnie chanced looking at Stefan and saw him imploring her to stay in his eyes. "Welcome back, Stefan. You were missed."

"I'm glad someone missed me," his tone a little more friendly and sincere with Bonnie.

Elena observed their interaction with an arched brow.

"I'll see you later, guys," was Bonnie's salutation.

Both Elena and Stefan kept their eyes on Bonnie who walked down the hall towards her locker. Alone, Elena was no longer confident in what to say to Stefan. She hadn't exactly prepared for the possibility of him coming back to school. In total they shared three classes together. So they would be seeing each other everyday.

"I don't want to keep you," Elena licked her lips. "I guess I'll see you in Calculus."

"Actually you won't. I got a new schedule, so English is the only class we have together."

"Oh." This surprised her greatly because she didn't think transferring classes this late in the semester was possible, and then she realized that Stefan probably compelled his way to a new schedule. The fact he was boldly avoiding her left a funny feeling in the pit of her stomach. But what did she expect? That they would be the kind of exes who could remain friends like Caroline and Matt?

"Excuse me," Stefan said, not once really looking at her the whole time they "caught up".

Bonnie exchanged her books. Caroline stood beside her looking in a compact mirror to touch up her lip gloss.

"So Stefan is back?" she asked. "Honestly did not think he'd step foot here ever again."

"You and me both," Bonnie concurred. "But Stefan isn't a runner. He doesn't run and hide from his problems."

"Did Elena freak out seeing him?"

"She did but she wasn't overly dramatic with it."

"I know if it was me I probably would have peed my pants and had a heart attack," Caroline caught sight of Stefan walking down the hallway. "He's coming."

Inwardly Bonnie tensed but only out of anticipation, not fear. She pivoted on her feet and faced Stefan who stopped right in front of her.

"Caroline," Stefan inclined his head towards the blonde vampire.

"Hi, Stefan," Caroline beamed. "Things have felt so weird since you've been gone."

Stefan chose to refrain from commenting on that. Instead he returned his attention to Bonnie who was nibbling on her bottom lip, nervously.

"I heard that your physics partner bailed on you."

Bonnie blinked. "Where did you hear that from?" she had a partner last week, so what happened?

Stefan's faced revealed nothing. "I just transferred to your class."

"You did?"

He nodded. "Your old partner is now taking it during eighth period. So I guess it's safe to assume you need a replacement."

Did Stefan compel her old partner to switch periods all so they could be in the same class together? Hmm.

Bonnie hunched a shoulder. "Are you offering?"

"Only if there's a vacancy."

Bonnie grew interested in staring at her shoes. "Sure. I guess could use the help."

"Consider it done," Stefan smiled and then reached for Bonnie's hand, giving her fingers a reassuring squeeze before taking off down the hall.

Caroline blinked. "Okay, what just happened? Are you and Stefan...?"

Bonnie slammed her locker closed. "No."

"I can totally see the two of you crushing on each other," Caroline grinned. "And it would be so _cute."_

"Caroline," Bonnie nearly growled. If Caroline scented a possible hookup on the horizon, she was notorious for blowing things way out of proportion. "He just got out of a relationship with my best friend! I'm not going there."

"And? Elena's dating his brother. That means Stefan is fair game."

Bonnie's jaw literally dropped. "I can't believe you'd advocate for the two of us to get together, which we're not."

Caroline's eyes rolled as they turned down another hall. "I might be a lot of things but I'm a realist. Both you and Stefan have repeatedly been hurt by Delena-,"

Bonnie scrunched up her nose. She could really kick the person who coined the use of branding two people's names together. Brangelina, Benifer so forth and so on.

"Can you please not refer to them by that ridiculous nickname?"

"Whatever. But Stefan, he's so lonely. I mean he's always been lonely, but he's really lonely now. I'm worried about him, and before you ask me why it's because he was there for me after I transitioned. And something tells me you might be _exactly _what he needs to officially move on from Elena."

"What makes you think he hasn't gotten over her?"

Caroline snorted as the two of them entered yet another classroom. She didn't respond until they were sitting at their assigned table.

"This is the guy who has made holding on to guilt, sorrow, and regret a profession. He's just not going to get over Elena overnight. Sure he can shut off his humanity, been there done that, and he certainly doesn't want to go through that again. I can tell he's coping but he's not _healing_. There's a difference."

Hmm, Bonnie thought. Caroline could see deeper into someone's despair than looking at a person from face-value. It was the kind of depth perception most wouldn't peg her to have, but she did, and when she utilized it, it always caught Bonnie off guard. Yet Bonnie had seen Stefan's despair for herself and knew Caroline only spoke the truth.

"So just give it some thought," Caroline advised and class began.

* * *

Bonnie didn't take long to make her decision. She wanted to be there for Stefan in whatever capacity was needed and whatever happened as a result, well she wouldn't run screaming and crying into the night because of it.

Once school was over she found him about to climb into his car. Bonnie jogged over to Stefan, calling his name.

"Stefan!"

Stefan straightened to his full height, eyes covered with dark shades, as he watched Bonnie sprint her way over to him. His first thought was that something was wrong, but he swapped that train of thought once Bonnie stood not two feet from him, slightly panting.

"I'm glad I caught you. Caroline bailed on me. Can I get a lift home?"

Out of his peripheral, Stefan saw Caroline marching her way to the football field for lacrosse practice. Inwardly he grinned at the white lie Bonnie just told.

"Sure, but we have to make a stop first," and inwardly he groaned. Stefan had left one of his journals behind at the boardinghouse and he needed to retrieve it because it contained deeply personal information, the kind of information he didn't want Damon mocking if he ever found it.

Bonnie nodded her head and smiled. "Thanks. I'm sorry to inconvenience you."

Stefan rounded the trunk of his Porsche to open the passenger side door for Bonnie. "It's not a problem, and besides it's not like Mystic Falls is the size of New York City."

Climbing behind the wheel, Stefan gunned the engine as the sounds of Coldplay filled the cabin of the car. He and Bonnie rode in companionable silence as he took the familiar streets to his old stomping grounds.

Bonnie knew where Stefan was headed and surreptitiously looked at him. She saw his knuckles going white as he clutched the steering wheel in a vice the closer they came to the boardinghouse. Stefan cricked his neck hoping to uncoil the muscles that were cramping up.

Finally they had arrived and Stefan paused before turning off the engine.

"Should I go in with you or do you want me to stay here?" Bonnie asked. The tension that radiated off Stefan was palpable.

"I'll only be a minute but if I'm not back in five, come get me."

Stefan was out of the car and through the front door before Bonnie could agree to his request. Stefan vampire sped to the library, the last place he remembered having his journal. He had stashed it between a set of books he was sure Damon would never, ever read: Christianity and Taoism. Finding his journal, Stefan plucked it from the shelf and retraced his steps, but then froze.

He looked down the gallery that led to Damon's room. Curiosity getting the better of him, Stefan found himself standing in the doorway of his brother's bedroom.

Everything was the way he remembered it except for one noticeable difference.

The huge, black and white picture hanging over his bed. It was a close up shot of Elena's face, hair blowing in the wind. On the bed was one of Elena's favorite lace nightgowns, and a pair of her shoes were sticking out from under the bed.

They were sharing a bed now. As he scented the air he could smell faint traces of sex. They wasted no time in consummating their relationship!

How could she do this to him? He had been her first and only love, or at least that's what she claimed. She had saved herself just for him and to turn around and be with his brother like it was no big deal, and completely eviscerate what they shared like it meant nothing! Stefan was livid!

The journal fell from Stefan's hands and landed on the floor with a slap. He stared at the shrine, for lack of a better word, over his brother's bed and felt his blood boiling and cells popping. Solar flares zapped from Stefan's eyes as he slipped into a rage he hadn't felt in decades.

His body moved without conscious thought as he picked up a table lamp and threw it at the wall. His hands ripped the white comforter off the bed before tearing it in half. Elena's scent floated into his nostrils egging on his madness. Stefan kicked over an end table, picked up the fireplace poker and smashed whatever could be turned into kibbles and bits.

The bathroom wasn't exempt from his terror as he kicked the bathtub until the porcelain splintered, cracked, and fell apart. He reached for the soap chalice that was perched on the sink and threw it at the glass encased shower. It rained shards. Stefan retraced his steps, snatched the curtains off the windows, blinds too, and entered the closet next and tore down shelves and racks.

He wasn't done.

Stepping back into the bedroom, he stood at the foot of the bed, and glared at that smiling picture of Elena like it was some kind of trophy. He still held the fireplace poker in his grasp like a javelin and threw it with as much force as he could muster—which was a lot. By the time he blinked it was embedded in Elena's neck. Snapping out his feral haze, he finally realized what he did. He could have, and _would_ have killed her if she had been standing in the room.

Stefan lost all feeling in his legs and dropped to the floor.

Bonnie found him sitting there with his head buried between his hands as he rocked back and forth. She stared at the destruction he did to Damon's room, and was caught off guard when she saw what he did to the picture of Elena hanging over the bed. Gracefully she fell to her knees and gently laid a hand on his shoulder. This was like their first encounter on the bluffs all over again only much worst and more violent. Bonnie could say with absolute certainty that if Damon or Elena had been here, they definitely would have received the brunt of Stefan's anger.

"Stefan," she tried to coax him to his feet. "It's okay."

"No, it's not. It's never going to be okay."

Bonnie felt her own throat burning with pain and her eyes sting with unshed tears.

"She lied to me. She never loved me. If she loved me she wouldn't sleep with my brother," he began laughing hysterically. "She's screwing him, Bonnie."

_Oh, boy. _"Let's go, Stefan."

Bonnie had to resort to slinging one of his arms around her shoulder, her other going around his waist to get him on his feet. They stopped long enough for Bonnie to retrieve his journal from the floor. Clumsily they made their way downstairs and out the house. Stefan was too paralyzed to drive so that task fell to her. Luckily Bonnie had taken a few lessons on how to drive a stick shift, but she wasn't a pro by any stretch of the word. Securing him in the passenger seat, Bonnie got behind the wheel. She was about to be hell on his transmission.

The most obvious place to take him was her house since she had no clue where he lived. Bonnie was about to break her one rule: no vampires in the house.

They arrived at her place in record time and she only stalled his car five times. Smoke wasn't coming from the engine so she figured the damage she may have done was minimal at best. Again, she had to take the lead to get Stefan out of the car, up the steps of the porch, and then, invite him inside.

"Stefan, come in," she said after unlocking the front door, pulling him in after her.

Stefan registered nothing. His eyes were blank, his face was expressionless, it was like he was a vegetable.

Bonnie pushed him towards the couch which he sat down on and then promptly keeled over. If Bonnie didn't have a soft spot for him she would have called him pathetic, but she understood his pain, could empathize with it. She had not been chosen either.

Going around the house, turning on lights, and checking for any messages from her dad, which there had been none, Bonnie came back into the living room to find Stefan hadn't moved from his spot. His eyes were still wide open and staring into nothingness. Sighing, she reached for his legs and pushed them on the couch. She took a seat on the coffee table.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Stefan shook his head. At least he was still partly responsive.

"I think you should talk about it, Stefan."

"It won't change anything," he replied quietly.

"It won't but at least you can air out your feelings, deal with them, and finally start to heal. You haven't been healing, you've been coping which is much worse because it says you're avoiding your pain. Like this man in a movie once said, you wish you never knew your loved one so you can be spared your pain. You hate them both and you need to admit that."

"I don't hate them. They broke my heart."

"If you keep things in, your brokenness will turn into hate. Trust me, I know. Why do you think I couldn't stand to be around you after Grams died? I just lost the only mother figure I had. I didn't deal with her death the way I should have. You said you wanted to know something about me, well here's something I never told anyone." Bonnie felt her heart quickening in her chest. "I killed someone, Stefan."

That certainly got his attention. "What?"

Bonnie looked away. "I wasn't in my right mind. I know that now. So I went to a bar looking for trouble and I found what I was looking for. There was a vampire there openly feeding on a woman, and I went to go intervene only she didn't want my help. The woman came after me with a knife and we fell and consequently she landed right on top of the knife. It pierced her in the heart. I might not have stabbed her myself, but I was responsible for her death just the same."

Stefan sat up slowly and blinked his eyes as if he were seeing a different version of Bonnie. "Why didn't you tell anyone?" he was almost angry.

Bonnie shrugged and then laughed nervously. "What was I supposed to say?" Tears lined the bottom of her eyes. "'Hey guys while I was mourning my grandmother's death I inadvertently stabbed a woman to death'."

Stefan licked his lips and felt something twist in his gut for Bonnie. Sitting across from him she appeared to be shrinking within herself. Keeping that secret in for so long did something to her. "It was an accident," he tried to reassure her. "What happened to the vampire?"

"An aneurysm and a stake is what happened. I was acting off emotion and adrenaline two very dangerous things for a human, especially a human that's a witch. The police showed up, took my statement, lucky for me witnesses came forward to collaborate my story of self-defense. And ever since, I've been different. Why do you think I preached so much about putting it all on the line for Elena when Klaus was after her?"

"To atone for what you did."

Bonnie nodded her head. "I'm not proud of what I did. I thought I was helping someone because I couldn't imagine anyone wanting to be a vampire's chew toy on purpose. Everything was black and white for me, Stefan. There was no middle ground. That's why I didn't de-spell the Gilbert device, only I used my Grams' as an excuse for that. I helped you and Damon not only for Elena's sake but for my own. When Caroline killed that guy from the carnival it was like that night all over again."

"Jesus," Stefan whispered and ran his hands through his hair. He never would have imagined that tiny Bonnie Bennett would have the gall to go after a vampire despite the cost to her own safety, or that she would deliberately look for a fight to begin with. "You know it wasn't your fault. You were trying to do the right thing and it ended badly."

Bonnie shook her head. "That's what I told myself over and over again but it never lessened the guilt. Every night for months I'd see that woman's face; I'd see her coming after me, and I'd see the knife. I'm glad I had so much to deal with back here that it helped me forget, but it still creeps up on me from time to time."

This explained so much yet Stefan felt they had barely scratched the surface. Listening to Bonnie share this secret with him made his own issues with Damon and Elena seem juvenile. Yes, he felt betrayed by them both because they brazenly chose one another over him, but it wasn't like someone else couldn't come along and chose him and be perfectly happy with just him.

Without thinking he pulled Bonnie to him and held her. Her tears wet his shirt, but Stefan wanted to be strong for her. Bonnie soaked up as much comfort from Stefan as she possibly could. It had been eons since anyone held her, made her feel safe. She snuggled just a little bit closer. Her sobs began to ebb the more he rubbed circles on her back.

Soon Stefan pulled Bonnie off the table and together they laid out on the couch, his arm around her waist, her head using his chest for a pillow.

They were quiet for a while.

"I wanna help you get through your guilt about what happened," he whispered.

Bonnie brushed the tears off her face. "I want to help you, too."

"How do we do this?"

"By doing what we're currently doing, I guess. Being candid with each other. I didn't mean to talk about my problems instead of helping you through yours."

"No, it's okay," Stefan quickly reassured. Since she began her story he seldom thought about Elena or Damon, as it turned out all he wanted to do was help her shift through the crap in her life, and in the process he might actually help himself. "I don't mind. In fact I like it when you're open with me."

Bonnie smiled a bit at that.

Their interlude was interrupted by the buzzing of Stefan's phone. He dug it out of his pocket and saw Damon's name flash across the screen in large caps as if to express his fury about coming home to find his room completely destroyed.

Stefan hit the ignore button and then shut his phone completely off.

"Not important?" Bonnie asked.

"Not important at all."

Chapter end.

**A/N: Just a reiteration, but Bonnie did not intentionally kill anyone. It was an accident in which she was trying to help a woman who turned on Bonnie and came after her. I felt like her reasons for hating Stefan in S1 was hollow, but a no-brainer with Damon. I can understand her not trusting them or wanting to be around them after Grams' passed, but to blame Stefan and Damon when it had been Grams' decision to keep going with the spell, that I can't get on board with a hundred percent. And I have an equally difficult time thinking Sheila wasn't aware of what could happen to her by lifting the tomb spell being she was a seasoned witch. And since we got no insight into how Bonnie in one minute wanted nothing to do with being a witch, to being "self-righteous, judgmental, and vengeful"( not my opinion of her), this was a filler into why she made certain choices on the show. Hope this makes sense. Thanks for reading. Love you guys! **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Long time no see. I started this chapter probably over a month ago, lost interest, but I'm back. Hope you enjoy the update. **

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

She was in a good mood. Not just an okay mood. Or an ordinary mood, or a "meh" mood, but a really good mood. For the first time in so long Bonnie woke up looking forward to the day. She woke up with a genuine smile on her face. Hearing the birds chirping didn't irritate her. Seeing the sun shining didn't make her wish for a cloudy day. The world around her seemed to be in high definition. Everything was brighter, smelled better. When she ate she could taste what she ate. When she said hello to her fellow classmates in the hall, she meant it. H-E-L-L-O!

Naturally Caroline would be the one to pick up on her change in attitude. For so long Bonnie wondered around with her own personal cloud over her head. She frowned all the time. Rolled her eyes so much it was a miracle she wasn't permanently crossed eyed. Kept her lips in a straight line for weeks at a time, and now the rarely used muscles in her face that helped in smiling was getting the workout of their lives.

"You're glowing," Caroline had said to her while they walked towards their political science class. "Does that mean you and a certain Salvatore have been…"

"Don't finish that sentence, Caroline. As I've said before and will keep saying, Stefan and I are friends. And that's it."

"Right. You know all great romances start with either hate or friendship."

Bonnie thought of those prophetic words as she made copies for her presentation for her Calculus class. She hated math with a passion and this was really an extra credit assignment. Learning about theories and formulas lost its appeal since day one. And her countless absences certainly didn't win her any favor with her teacher. So here she was at FedEx/Kinkos making professional looking copies of her PowerPoint presentation to appease her teacher who would probably hate it anyways.

"Thanks," Bonnie said to the cashier once she was handed her change. Grabbing her bag off the counter, she left the store and of course ran into a leather-clad chest.

Bonnie didn't bother looking up to apologize. She knew who it was.

Call this a fate intervention but Damon had been looking for her all over the city. He peered down at Bonnie and chortled because she was trying so hard to pretend he wasn't standing right in front of her.

Bonnie sighed and forced her eyes to meet his. Little by little she felt her happy mood dissolving like Alka Seltzer tablets in water.

"Just the person I've been looking for," he began. "Tell your boyfriend I'm sending his ass the bill for destroying my room."

"Go eff a porcupine," erupted from Bonnie's mouth. She stepped around Damon hating the fact he was able to lower her there. That she gave into her anger. It was always better to pretend he didn't exist rather than to acknowledge him even if it was to curse him out. Because if it was one thing she learned about Damon, he hated being ignored.

To her dismay Damon fell in step beside her. Bonnie tightened her hold on her purse strap and her bag.

"Look, I get that you're mad at me about the whole Abby thing, and let me apologize for that."

His voice did not sound apologetic.

"Sorry, Elijah forced my hand I had to kill your mother in order to protect Elena. My bad."

Bonnie stopped dead in her tracks. Damon did the same. Mentally she told herself to calm down, told herself to breathe, told her common sense to guide her through these next few minutes because there was a water hose not ten feet from her and no one was standing around.

She faced him and Damon took a noticeable step back. There was fire in her eyes as smoke blew from her nostrils. He was under the false sense of security that Bonnie wouldn't light him on fire in public. Yet he wasn't so sure about that theory. He had seen the water hose, too.

"Be lucky we are in public because otherwise I'd have you on the ground kissing my toes." She looked around covertly and did it anyways.

Damon grabbed both sides of his head, groaned, and fell. This wasn't good enough. He wasn't in enough pain. This pain he was experiencing was temporary. What Bonnie felt cooking her heart was permanent and ever-present. She had to go to bed with the knowledge her mother left her for the second time in her life, choosing something else over being the mother she should have been from the beginning. Abby had chosen to stay away from Mystic Falls for a pretty lousy and sh*tty reason. And she chose to raise someone else's kid as her own.

What about her? Did she not matter? If she couldn't matter to her own mother, how could Bonnie ever hope to matter to a piece of crap like Damon?

She was sure he was calling her name. His groaning interrupted her reverie. There was so many things she wanted to say to him, so many ways she wanted to light into his ass, make him feel it. Make him _really _regret his actions. In this moment, Bonnie actually wanted him dead.

"I hate you so much," she whispered fiercely. "I don't understand why you do the things you do and doing it all in Elena's name. This is what God must feel like when people kill innocent children in his name. You're disgusting, Damon. I should do the world a favor and get rid of you."

"Bon-_nie_," his eyes had rolled completely in the back of his head and she could see nothing but white.

She had never sustained giving someone an aneurysm for this long.

Stefan appeared by her side out of nowhere. He took Bonnie's face between his hands trying to get her attention because her show was drawing a crowd.

"Bonnie, look at me, look at me. Just stop. You have to stop."

Tears had wet her cheeks and a small sliver of blood leaked from her nose. She hadn't had a nosebleed in a long time.

"Why?" she asked Stefan. She couldn't understand why he would want her to stop, why he wouldn't be pleased that she was essentially turning his brother's brain into mush. "I thought…you'd be happy. With him gone…"

Yeah, three weeks ago he wanted Damon's head to decorate his new mantel, but now…he was doing this more so for Bonnie. Not Damon. Bonnie would regret her actions. As much as he couldn't stomach the idea of Elena loving his brother, he knew Damon's death at Bonnie's hand would devastate Elena, and then in turn devastate Bonnie. There was little left to salvage in his relationship with brother, and Stefan was perfectly fine with that, but he knew Bonnie wouldn't be okay with losing Elena's friendship.

Or maybe she would, a little voice in the back of his mind said. Bonnie and Elena weren't as tight as they used to be. Relationships changed like seasons, and people never remained the way they were in the beginning. Either things improved for the better or they deteriorated until nothing was recognizable.

Stefan pulled her closer. "Just stop," he carefully enunciated the words.

Bonnie looked down at Damon who was curled up on the sidewalk, no longer clutching his head. He really did look as if she were sucking the life out him.

She blinked and it was all over. "I didn't want to stop," she admitted in a small, child-like voice.

"I know you didn't." Stefan looked over his shoulder at Damon who wasn't moving. If he hadn't seen them from across the street and intervened on time, his brother really would be dead.

"Is he dead?"

"I don't think he is."

She pouted. Stefan would have laughed because she really was adorable when she pouted, however, that wouldn't have been appropriate during this matter.

"Come on, let's go."

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and directed her away from Damon. Some concerned citizens began gathering to offer help to the fallen vampire who was slowly coming to.

Bonnie said nothing as Stefan drove her to some part of town she'd never been too before. All that was going through her mind was that moment back on the sidewalk with Damon. She wasn't a killer. Bonnie knew that implicitly about herself, however, the desire to kill had overwhelmed her, and frightened her. For so long she had been a protector. Even when she battled Klaus that first time, she didn't want him dead with the same vehemence she wanted Damon.

Bonnie could understand the difference. Klaus had never done anything directly to her. Sure he wanted to break a curse and needed to drain Elena dry of blood in order to do so, however, he never bit her, and he certainly wasn't the one to turn her mom into a vampire.

Damon had done those things and still he had life, or whatever it was a vampire had. Why was it that he survived and others around him lost their lives? How was it that he got the girl and not the good guy? Nature had a lot of explaining to do. Because things weren't adding up.

"Why did you stop me?" Bonnie asked suddenly.

Stefan nearly swerved into the other lane. "Because if you had gone through with killing Damon, you would have lost Elena as a friend and you'd be filled with a tremendous amount of guilt for hurting someone you love."

Silence filled the car and Stefan took his eyes off the road to look at Bonnie only to find her eyes were plastered to his face.

"You think I care about losing Elena's friendship at this point? There are other best friends in the world. _Better _best friends who wouldn't put a murderous asshole before the people who supposedly matter. She threw what was left of our friendship out the window when she chose to be with Damon. I can't and I won't support their relationship."

Well, that shut up Stefan. He prided himself on his diplomacy skills and knew it wouldn't serve anyone's interest to play devil's advocate.

"Are you sure you didn't stop me because you didn't want to lose your brother?" she asked with a hint of accusation in her tone.

Stefan sighed and made the turn off to his house. "I'm sure that's what my actions appeared I was doing…trying to save Damon's life. But it wasn't _his _life I was worried about in that moment. I could have easily spirited him away, but I didn't. My concern, my only concern was you. Killing out of anger or emotion is never good or wise. You end up feeling a thousand times worst than you originally did."

"But I was having such a wonderful day, Stefan and he, for lack of a better word, killed it. All he had to do was keep his damn mouth shut and let me go about my day, but no, Damon being Damon had to be a dick. You want to know the first thing to come out of his mouth…he said 'tell your boyfriend I'm sending his ass the bill for destroying my room'."

Stefan hiked an eyebrow in the air. He did hear everything Bonnie just revealed, but he was stuck on the word "boyfriend". Something warm crawled around his insides.

"And then this fool had the audacity to offer me a smart-ass, lackluster, piece of crap apology about turning Abby. Why waste your breath being insincere? He honestly didn't think he did anything wrong and his attitude suggested I get over it. Well, I'm not and I won't. Abby might be the whackest mom on the face of the earth but she's still _my mother, _and what he did, cost me a relationship with her again."

Stefan wanted to say he's just as responsible for Abby leaving, yet he kept his trap shut. They had been down this road—technically. Instead he would just let Bonnie vent.

Rolling up the driveway, Stefan parked and cut the engine. Bonnie only now realized they were parked in front of Stefan's new home. It was a beautiful two-story Gothic style home that kind of screamed Edgar Allen Poe, but in a cool, modern way.

She pointed her finger towards the property. "This is your new house?"

Stefan nodded his head. "Yep, my very own bachelor pad. When I lived in other cities I typically rented out apartments. Made it easier to move. I should warn you, it's not fully furnished and it needs a ton of work. I'm in the middle of renovations."

Bonnie got out of the car, staring at the steeple roofs, the floor-to-ceiling windows, the dark brown brick work, and the gargoyle that sat on the highest peek of the roof.

"That's Bob. He keeps watch of the house when I'm gone."

Bonnie snorted, and continued to look around. The house was about half the size of the boardinghouse which really was a mansion, the only mansion other than the Mayor's house in town. Bonnie calculated it sat on an acre or more of land most of it overrun with forest. But she saw the potential. And she also liked the seclusion.

Together they walked to the front door. Walking through the foyer Bonnie's eyes took note of the vaulted ceilings, crown moldings, the dark paneled walls, the hardwood floor, and the fireplace that was in the shape of a lion's mouth.

"There are four bedrooms, three and a half baths, fully stocked kitchen, a sun room, and a two car garage. I'm thinking about clearing out some of the woods and building either a small lake or pond."

"No swimming pool?" Bonnie asked over her shoulder.

"If I built one and word got out, I'd never get to spend another peaceful night here."

She laughed. That much was true. "Am I your first house guest?"

"Second. The house is in Matt's name so he had to be the one to invite me in."

"Smart man," Bonnie complimented. She was desperate to know what his bedroom looked liked, and then remembered she never saw his room at the boardinghouse. But a bedroom is a private sanctuary and Bonnie didn't want to invade his space.

And this place sure did offer a lot of it. Despite it being sparingly furnished, even with furniture, Stefan would have plenty of room to move around.

Stefan was a little embarrassed to be caught living in such squalor. But there hadn't been an urgent need to buy a couch, or a table, rugs, lamps, or anything to make this place feel more like a home. The only furniture he had in this room was two large wingback chairs. A sixty-inch plasma was mounted to the wall over the fireplace. That pretty much summed it up.

"Let me take you on a tour," he said. Together they climbed the massive staircase to the second floor. He showed Bonnie the other bedrooms. Two of them were in desperate need of a fresh coat of paint and extermination. In the smallest room, Stefan wanted to rip the fading wallpaper off the walls and maybe turn it into an office.

When they reached his room, he hesitated a bit. Just last week he finally got rid of all the boxes after having unpacked. Thankfully his bed was made, which he had ordered a new bed, so it was pretty much the focal point of the room and basically sucked up all the room. His desk sat caddy corner to the large picture window and sitting atop of it was his Mac. Tapestries covered two of the paneled walls, and several heavy Persian rugs covered the floor.

In the corners flanking the bed, were two large wrought iron candelabras with foot long candles perched on them. A wrought iron chandelier probably dating back to the dark ages hung from the ceiling in the middle of the room. Blood-red drapes covered the windows and pooled on the floor in velvet layers. Bonnie smelled some herb in the air.

"Sage," Stefan answered her unspoken question. This room wasn't that much different from his old room, but he decided to keep things simple because there had been too much clutter. Stefan had traded in several of his old armoires for a massive one that took up most of the wall next to the door. It was filled with his books, journals, and clothes. The bathroom was located on the other end of the room, behind his desk.

"It's a little medieval for my taste, but I like it."

"Well, I'm glad it got your seal of approval."

Bonnie didn't want to do too much investigating but she couldn't help but feel like Sookie when Bill showed her his "hidey hole", a vampire's greatest secret.

She turned to face him. "Why did you bring me here?"

He pushed away from the wall. "Because I wanted to take your mind off what happened with Damon. He's not important enough to throw away your happy mood."

Bonnie didn't say anything for a while. "You're right. I've given him far too much power of me. I could have kept walking, tuned him out, but I let him bring me to his level. I'm making this promise right now, and you're my witness. Damon Salvatore no longer has any control over me. I will not acknowledge him in anyway. I will not let him rob of me of what's rightfully mine. Not anymore. I will be the bigger person, the better person. He will not destroy what's left of me."

Bonnie held out her hand and together she and Stefan shook on it. "I should make the same declaration," he said. "As much as I wanted to redeem my brother, in the it's end more trouble than its worth. So I promise to live out the remainder of my days not letting his decisions affect me and take me that dark place."

"Good for you," said Bonnie.

"So," Stefan reluctantly let go of her hand. "What do you want to do?"

An arched eyebrow rose in the air. "You're giving me a choice?" Bonnie placed a hand over her heart.

Stefan pursed his lips together. "Yes, I'm giving you a choice. But I can throw out some options. We can watch a movie."

Bonnie shook her head.

"Okay, we can go for a stroll in the woods."

"Next," Bonnie shot him down. She had had enough of traipsing through the woods to last her a lifetime.

"We can order a pizza and watch really bad reality TV."

"Bing! We have a winner."

So that's what they did until dusk had settled. Stretched out on the floor, a fire going in the hearth, Stefan poured out the remainder of plum flavored merlot into Bonnie's glass who was busy stretching like a cat on a pile of pillows. Stefan's eyes followed her movement and he cleared his throat. He sat the bottle aside and picked up his goblet.

"Why did you come back to Mystic Falls, Stefan?" Bonnie wondered as she stared at him.

Stefan nearly swallowed his sip of wine down the wrong pipe. Yet he answered her question plainly. "Elena."

Bonnie snorted. "Seems like that chick is the epicenter to everything. You know, Abby said the reason why she checked out was to protect her best friend…more specifically her best friend's daughter. And guess who that might be."

"Elena," Stefan deadpanned.

Bonnie imitated the sound of a bell. "You would be correct. So let's tally up the score shall we," Bonnie rolled until she was on her back. She began to check items off with her fingers. "I lost my mother for fifteen years because of Elena. I lost my grandmother because De-Mon wanted to free his bitch of an ex, and Elena wanted to give him his last dying wish."

That wasn't exactly accurate because Stefan was the one to approach Sheila about it. Elena just happened to tag along.

"And my mother was turned into a vampire in order to keep Elena alive. Why do I still tolerate this person in my life? Her presence is the reason so much shit has happened, and not just to me, but to _everyone. _And I know it's not all her fault. She didn't ask to be the doppelganger, and how come she's the only one able to make hybrids? Why did that lot have to fall on her shoulders alone? Really, all of this is giving me an aneurysm."

"Bonnie," Stefan called for her attention. He rose to his feet and held out his hand to Bonnie who stared at his appendage questioningly.

Reluctantly Bonnie gave him her hand and she was quickly hauled on her feet.

He grabbed both sides of her face. "I don't want to hear another word about Elena. I don't want you to bring up old memories that are going to cause you nothing but pain and frustration. You said that Damon would not drag you down, well make the same declaration in terms of Elena. Okay?"

Bonnie was ready to contest this, but nodded. Stefan was right. She was only causing herself more stress by continuously replaying all the wrongs that had been dealt to her on a loop. It wasn't helping her make progress in any other area in her life, and that's what she needed to do. Make progress. Re-discover who she is.

However there were several things about "that night" which confused Bonnie. Why didn't the witches do more to protect her and her mother? Didn't they know what Damon and yes—Stefan had planned for them? If they were so big on protecting their own, why didn't they drop the vampires like bad habits the minute they stepped foot on the property? They had no problems lamely trying to stick to Klaus until he threatened to wipe out the entire Bennett line.

So what gives?

Maybe they didn't lift a finger to help because they needed Bonnie to hate vampires for whatever was coming next.

If that were the case they would have to do more than that. Sure there were a few that were on her shit list but it wasn't her job to condemn an entire race for the despicable acts of a few. Bonnie would never agree to kill Caroline, Tyler, and not even Stefan, though she had every reason to hate him as much as she hated Damon. But the difference between them being, Stefan was actually sincere with his apology and showed remorse for his actions. To Damon, every kill is justifiable.

While she was thinking all this she hadn't even noticed that jazz music was playing and that she and Stefan were dancing.

"What the hell?" she blurted and jerked backwards.

"What?"

"Why are we dancing?"

Stefan rolled his eyes. "Just go with the flow, Bonnie."

Bonnie settled against him. Hmm, this was her first time dancing with Stefan and they had attended their fair share of parties, founder's events, and romps in the woods. He was surprisingly good on his feet, felt even better pressed against her.

Whoa, where did that thought come from?

Bonnie pushed it to the far recesses of her mind, yet her mind had other plans. Those plans consisted of taking note of how warm Stefan's skin was. When she touched him she still felt death, but it was a feeling she had gotten used to with time. And he smelled pretty nice, had awesome facial bone structure, and big hands.

Gulp.

The wine, it must be the wine taking over her sensibilities. That explained it.

However, when she looked into his bluish-gray orbs, it wasn't the wine so much that seemed as if her eyes were opening for the first time.

Stefan returned her speculative gaze. Lately, they had shared more of themselves with one another that it might not have occurred had he still been with Elena. Which saddened him because upon meeting Bonnie he singled her out as being a good friend. Recognized her as being genuine with a good heart. He liked her. He liked her still yet he had to keep her and everyone else at arm's length so his secret wouldn't be revealed. But now that boundary was no longer in place. He could be as candid and open with Bonnie as he pleased, however, the question remained, did he want to do that again?

"What are you thinking?" Bonnie was curious.

Instead of answering, Stefan spun her out. "I was thinking I made the right choice."

"Oh. What did you have to choose?"

"I was going to leave Mystic Falls. It was an agreement that Damon and I came to before She Who Shall Not Be Named made her choice. But I had a change of heart. If I didn't let Klaus and his hybrids run me out of town, why should I allow my brother and ex-girlfriend to do the honor? But that's only part of the reason why I'm glad I stayed."

Bonnie kept her inquisitive gaze locked on Stefan, trying her best not to get lost in his eyes.

"The other reason why I'm glad I stayed is because I'm getting to know you better. And I wouldn't trade this moment for anything in the world."

That was effective in getting Bonnie to lower her eyes to the floor. She felt her entire body blushing. She didn't get the chance to hide from Stefan and his probing gaze forever. He lifted her head by the chin.

"Thank you for giving me a chance, Bonnie."

She inclined her head before placing it back on his shoulder as he continued to lead her across the floor.

Chapter end.

**A/N: Sorry this is kind of short…for me at least. I like this story because I have a chance to vent and allow characters to bring up points that happened on the show which made no fudging sense. If you're reading this and you're an Elena supporter…I won't apologize for my opinions about that character. I liked Season 1 Elena until the writers turned her into a nitwit damsel in distress. I understand she's seventeen (eighteen now) but they've reduced her and several other characters into children who need a major time out. My rant is over. Hope you enjoyed it. More is to come…eventually. Love you and thank you for reading. **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who left a review, read this puppy, added to your favorites/alerts. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside and that I'm getting things right. Here is the latest. Enjoy!**

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

Bonnie clicked off the television and stared blankly at the screen. For a moment she was paralyzed, allowing her mind to process what she just witnessed. She had just finished viewing the sixth episode of her new TV obsession _Scandal _, and she couldn't understand why tears were coursing down her cheeks.

Blindly wiping them away, Bonnie sat back against the sofa, but then decided she needed to move to make sure she still had life in her limbs. She did and walked to the kitchen to get something to cool off her heated skin.

There had been legendary TV couples before Fitz and Olivia of course, and Bonnie tried to think if any of them had a tenth of the chemistry that literally nuked her TV anytime they appeared on screen together, and she couldn't think of a single one. Filling a glass with water from the tap, Bonnie took a tentative step and then sighed.

No one had ever touched her reverently. Not even Jeremy and they were boyfriend and girlfriend yet clearly not in love considering he confessed to Elena that _Anna _was the only girl he loved. What kind of bullshit was that, Bonnie had wanted to say at the time but she was preoccupied with sending the ghosts away, and of course having to deal with the humiliation of knowing that your living boyfriend would rather be with the ghost of his vampire ex-girlfriend. If that wasn't a slap to the face, a kick in her femininity and pride, Bonnie didn't know what was. Sure, she understood the mechanics of relationships in high school. Everything was tentative at best and things had a way of ending before they began. She never expected her relationship with Jeremy Gilbert to be epic, the stuff legends are made of, but HE was the one to pursue a relationship with HER, and how did he choose to honor that?

By kissing his GHOST OF AN EX-GIRLFRIEND THAT WAS A FREAKING VAMPIRE!

Bonnie gripped the granite kitchen counter and breathed deeply trying her best to center herself and her thoughts. Dishes and other kitchen utensils rattled on the counter tops and the lights flickered on and off as a response to her erratic emotions. Bonnie wondered why couldn't she have nice things. Why was the world and those around her determined to shit on her at every single opportunity? Why did the people she love and would gladly die for not willing to reciprocate?

Okay, she understood that thinking along those lines was being counterproductive to the progress she had made. Little by little Bonnie had been putting the fractured pieces of her life back together. The picture was still very much incomplete, but now after watching that damn episode it was leaving her feeling all sorts of f*cked up.

These were fictional characters with real life problems which was probably why people became addicted to them because you could identify with a facet of the protagonists' issues. Had Bonnie ever been entangled in a forbidden love affair? No. Her two best friends—yes. Elena, before she made her choice had been between two vampire brothers. Caroline had been between two best friends, and now she was sort of between a master and a slave. And Bonnie…

She couldn't say that her brief involvement in the Jeremy/Anna saga could count as an actual love triangle. It was more of a technicality since the only person able to see Anna was Jeremy, thereby leaving Bonnie out of the loop but still somehow caught in it.

Bonnie figured the consequences with asking the witches to bring Jeremy back might be growing hair in unsightly places, or not being able to do heavy-duty spells, or perhaps losing the activity of a limb. She didn't think it would entail having her boyfriend walking around all Jennifer Love Hewitt in Ghost Whisperer. She never would have imagined that _that _would be the consequence, and one she didn't feel she rightly deserved. She saved his _life_! She single-handedly saved Elena from becoming the lone Gilbert, and as her form of thanks she's cheated on by her boyfriend with a ghost! Not even a live person. Hell, Bonnie would have preferred if Jeremy cheated on her with another guy, at least dude would have been tangible and she could direct her anger at something.

More than likely, after sending the ghosts away, Anna was able to find her mom and the two of them vanished into happy bliss.

Again, not fair.

Why was it that Anna could be with her mom and Bonnie was abandoned by hers? Why was it that people could knock off other people to keep one lone female alive? Why was it that one friend could have pictures of herself standing next to ponies drawn by a murderous vampire and lavished with diamond bracelets and fancy gowns, and she gets what? Pushed around by a bunch of assholes who would be dead a thousands times over if it weren't for her ingenuity.

Now she was blowing smoke through her nostrils.

Bonnie was seventeen. She would be eighteen soon, and she honestly could say she's had a very crappy year. There were high points and low points, but sometimes the low points outweighed the high points. And she could scarce remember anything good her seventeenth year on the planet that she wanted to place in her scrapbook of memories. There wasn't much and that saddened her immensely.

So she turned her thoughts back to the show she just finished viewing. Bonnie of course did not condone a married man having illicit affairs, possibly fathering a bastard child, while of course coveting a single woman who worked on his campaign for presidency. However, what she just saw wasn't lust in its purest form, but love, true love between a man and a woman who, under much different circumstances, would probably be together.

Even now Bonnie still caught goose bumps after replaying that scene in her mind. Of watching Fitz and Olivia sitting on her couch for "one minute". He ceased being the leader of the free world. She ceased being a powerful attorney who could stomp with the big dawgs and not piss her panties. He ceased being a married man—although that was something a person couldn't turn off whenever the mood suited you. They were simply, in that moment, two people who loved each other and would take what stolen moments they could because that was all they could have. With the world watching your every move, expressing what was burning in your heart was not only career suicide, but the death of one's livelihood as well. Yet what really got to Bonnie was the fact Fitz had been moved almost to the brink of tears just from the simple act of holding the woman he loved.

Bonnie had never been on the receiving end of anything remotely close to that kind of devotion. But she was young. Her time would come—maybe. Right now there were other things she had to concern herself with and not the love lives of TV characters.

But it had been a useful distraction even if it lasted no more than forty-two minutes. It was forty-two minutes she didn't have to think about being a witch, and wondering what might happen next that would have her speeding into the night to fulfill her magical negro duties.

Her phone rang. Great, Bonnie mumbled and swung around to the kitchen island and picked up her iPhone.

"Hi Stefan," Bonnie tried her best to sound upbeat and cheery although she had been practically crying a minute ago.

"Hey, what are you doing?"

"Nothing. I was just watching some TV. What about you?" her voice might have wavered a bit and she hoped Stefan wouldn't notice and question her about it. He was perceptive, eerily so sometimes and she really wasn't in a soul-bearing mood.

"Are you okay? You sound…different."

"I'm fine," Bonnie replied flatly. "Did you need something? I was about to finish up some homework and get to bed."

There was a brief pause. "I'm coming over."

Dial tone.

Bonnie cursed and dropped her phone. She wasn't in the right frame of mind to entertain guests, but when she thought long and hard about it she didn't want to be alone right now. She had spent too much time processing all of her problems, handling them on her own, or ignoring them completely. Caroline was typically her go-to person for a distraction whether it be through shopping or listening to her mindless chatter, but even that had gotten old as of late. Elena? Bonnie couldn't remember the last time she hung out with Elena.

Did she miss her long-haired friend? Sometimes. Did she want to officially patch things up instead of covering old wounds with scotch tape? Sure, why not? They had been friends for longer than most marriages, and though she didn't simply want to toss her friendship with Elena aside like it was leftover food, Bonnie was tired of being the one to let Elena off the hook, of apologizing first. And if she thought long and hard about, Elena hadn't been her friend in a while.

She came to Bonnie with boy and vampire problems, but Elena never talked to Bonnie about Bonnie. She hated to sound so narcissistic, but Bonnie couldn't remember the last time she honestly poured her little heart out to her best friend, and have Elena give her good, sound advice, or merely offered her shoulder to cry on. And in a lot of areas Bonnie withheld information because…well…she wasn't sure why. Maybe it was her own form of self-preservation, of protecting herself. Whatever the reason, they had lost their chemistry and camaraderie way back in October of 2011.

Bonnie jumped when the door bell sounded. Either Stefan vampire sped his way over here or he broke every single traffic law to reach her house in under ten minutes. Nevertheless, Bonnie wiped any makeup residue from her eyes, ran her hands over her clothes, and marched to the front door.

Stefan looked fresh and concerned as he stood on the opposite side of the door. He was still dressed in the clothes he wore to school: a tight flannel shirt, dark jeans, leather jacket, heavy boots. His caramel hair was still perfectly styled, his face preternaturally handsome and stuttering inducing, blue-green eyes candid and probing.

"Hey," Bonnie greeted and stepped aside allowing him entry. She closed the door after he stepped into the foyer, turning to keep her in his line of sight.

"You sounded kind of sad on the phone. I wanted to check on you. Make sure you were all right."

Bonnie folded her arms over her chest and walked into the living room. Stefan followed her and together they sat down on the couch keeping a respectable amount of distance between them.

Lately Bonnie found herself almost primping before she hung out with Stefan. If he invited her over to his place just to hang out or do homework, Bonnie would stop at home first, take a quick shower, change her clothes, and do something different with her hair. If they opted to get a bite to eat at the roadside diner where they shared their first solo meal, she oftentimes became self-conscious. Bonnie wasn't a vain person—at all—she of course liked looking cute and wearing trendy clothes, but she wasn't obsessed about her looks. Yet now that she was spending a majority of her time with Stefan she found herself wanting to look presentable at all times.

She wasn't ready to question her motives about that just yet.

Stefan kept his eyes plastered to Bonnie's face. Words would come out of her mouth saying one thing while her face told a completely different story. Sometimes Bonnie was a very hard person to read, and then other times she was an open book. Right now she was caught somewhere in the middle.

"I wasn't…I'm okay," Bonnie stumbled. "You really didn't have to come all the way over here just to check on me."

Wordlessly, Stefan reached for her hand, interlocking their fingers. Hand holding—some might consider it elementary—but sometimes that's all Bonnie really wanted and needed was some form of contact from another person. And Stefan could always sense when she needed it.

"Bon…you think I don't know your little quirks by now?" he smiled revealing those straight white teeth of his. "I can tell something got you down, now just spit it out or I will be forced to reach into my bag of interrogation methods to get it out of you."

Bonnie snorted and tried to keep the smile from forming on her face and failed. She let go of Stefan's hand, slid on the couch and tucked her feet under her. Stefan used this mini-break to take his jacket off and toss it on the adjacent love seat.

"What's on your mind?" Stefan asked.

Now that she was being forced to talk about it, Bonnie was beginning to feel silly. "I was watching this show…on ABC…and I know this crap isn't real, but the way the actors portray these two characters involved in a very forbidden love affair…it just got to me. It made me think over my own love life, or I should say non-existent love life, and…I was thinking how nice it would be to be loved like that."

Stefan digested and dissected Bonnie's words before replying. "Bon, I've never questioned your relationship with Jeremy, but it didn't seem very…passionate. Granted he was only sixteen…but…something was missing."

To that Bonnie rolled her eyes and snorted again. "Yeah, something _was_ missing. That crazy little thing called love."

"Did you love him?"

Bonnie shrugged. She was sure what she felt for Jeremy was love. Was it passionate love? Did she burn for his touch? Was he constantly on her mind and not in terms of keeping him safe, but just thinking of him in general? Did she have erotic fantasies about him when she should have been paying attention in class?

Quite frankly, no.

"If I brought him back from the dead, I loved him."

"That sounds like an evasive answer. It was a yes or no question."

"Yes, I did love him. But you're right…what we had wasn't passionate. Not by a long shot. I think we were just too lonely people trying to find our way in this supernatural world. Jeremy had been there for me when I struggled with my powers. He was the first person to go out of his way to show genuine concern about my life when I was all ready to die for Elena. Yet I knew that if the decision ever came down to saving my life or his sister's…" Bonnie tossed a hand in the air. "His sister would win every time. And no, I don't think that's a bad thing. He can always get another girlfriend. He could never get another sister."

"All that being said," Stefan began, "if you were the love of Jeremy's life there would be some struggle in making that decision."

"Maybe."

"Bon, you know you're worth dying for, right?" Stefan stared at her seriously. "Worth fighting for?"

The question drew her up short. "I…suppose."

"You. Are." Stefan said vehemently. "You're just as valuable as everyone you know and love, and never doubt that for another second. If no one else tells you this, I will. Your life matters to _me_," he concluded by laying his hand on his chest.

Bonnie played with her fingers allowing his words to sink in. "Thank you. That means a lot to hear."

They were quiet for a while.

"Hey, I didn't offer you anything to eat or drink. I can get you something."

"I'm fine," Stefan replied quickly. "So one little television show had you questioning the mysteries of love and life," he failed to keep the amusement out of his voice.

"Go ahead and make fun of me. I do not care. It's called good TV and good writing. If you forget what you've watched five seconds after a show goes off…then you just wasted an hour of your life."

Stefan had to concede she had a point.

"Look," Bonnie wet her lips with her tongue before continuing. It distracted Stefan but she was looking at a snag on the couch. "I know I'm young and if I'm blessed I have a lot of years ahead of me, but for once I would just like to experience what Olivia feels when she's around Fitz. And I would like a guy to love me like Fitz does Olivia—mind you that he's not married of course."

Stefan's eyebrows drew together in confusion. Were these people Bonnie knew? "You've lost me, Bonnie."

"Oh," she giggled a bit. "Sorry. Those are the characters from the show I was watching earlier. I recorded the episode. Do you want to watch it?"

He didn't have anything else important to do and if it meant being around Bonnie a little longer, he would have agreed to clean her room. "Sure."

Bonnie turned on the TV, clicked off the table lamp, and snuggled up on the couch to re-watch by far her favorite episode of _Scandal. _

* * *

Okay, it took a lot to make Stefan cry. You could shoot him up with wooden bullets, stick him in direct sunlight without his ring, plunge him a well full of vervain and he would not shed a tear.

However, after watching the last five minutes of that friggin television show, he wanted someone to hold _him. _Now he could see why that would move Bonnie to tears and have her question her lackluster love life.

Love like that was a rarity and Stefan foolishly thought he had it with Elena. No, he _did_, but after ripping through the heartland of America, nearly driving Elena off the very bridge where her parents died, and doing a slew of other horrendous acts in his quest to kill Klaus, Elena slipped through his fingers like sand. Damon had conveniently or strategically placed himself in Elena's life offering her a choice that was the antithesis of what Stefan had been reduced to becoming.

He left Mystic Falls of his own reconnaissance in order to save his brother. From that one act alone, Stefan believed he sealed his fate and lost Elena forever. Yet throughout it all she still loved him, but along the way she had fallen in love with Damon.

The thought of them together didn't make him shake with rage or burn with nausea. Stefan was an expert on Damon and knew his history better than anyone, and in many ways felt this was some kind of atonement. Stefan always managed to get the girl, however, people tend to overlook the fact he didn't get to "keep" the girl. Damon was always in the background flitting around, being seductive, charming, and controlling, and for whatever reason women flocked to him too, despite the fact they treated him like a second choice, a rest stop.

Were these reasons to justify Damon and Elena being together, no, it wasn't. But they were reasons for why Stefan was letting go of his anger over the situation. He and Damon had been wasting their eternity by hurting and manipulating each other. Stefan was done. Over it. He wanted nothing else to do with his brother and he was perfectly fine living out the rest of his life knowing that at last Damon found happiness and peace. Did he agree with the source of where this happiness and peace came from—didn't take a genius to figure that out.

The situation was what it was.

Getting back to what he just witnessed, Stefan looked over at Bonnie and the unshed tears that lined the bottom of her eyes. He leaned over and wiped a tear that escaped, which caused her to jump at the contact.

Bonnie looked at Stefan across the cushion that separated them. They were silent for a long time, just staring at one another, thinking their separate thoughts. The air was becoming charged with some strange electricity that made the hair on the back of her arms and neck stand at full attention. Stefan's eyes dropped to study her lips. They were beautiful lips that an artist could spend an entire afternoon drawing and sketching. He wondered if they were as pillowy soft as they looked.

Clearing her throat, Bonnie got up from the couch. She thought it best to put some distance between herself and Stefan. Besides her heart was beginning to swim laps in her chest, and the way he kept gawking at her mouth…

She shivered a bit and then felt a hand on her shoulder. Stefan turned her around and pressed her up against the wall.

Bonnie's eyes enlarged and her mouth plopped open. "Stefan…what?"

He silenced her by placing his index finger over her lips. They _were _soft. Her baited breath tickled his finger which sent a signal to a particular body part.

Bonnie dropped her eyes to stare at her toe socks in an attempt to hide.

"Look at me."

Bonnie's eyes snapped back up to Stefan's face. He might not be aware of the fact he spoke the same line Fitz did to Olivia in the Oval Office.

_Snap out of it and while you're at it get a freakin' life! _Bonnie admonished herself. Yet the way Stefan said them were as intimate and erotic as a touch.

"Just…stand here and look at me," Stefan said softly.

Her heart was pounding. Was Stefan trying to make a deep rooted fantasy come true? Was he doing this out of pity because she had been feeling sorry for herself earlier? Or was he doing this because he was attracted to her?

The light from the TV was the only illumination in the room and cast an interesting shadow over Stefan's chiseled features. Half his face was covered in darkness leaving a lone eye for her to lock gazes with. Stefan had a very direct stare—she knew that, and a couple of times throughout their history she had been under that stare, but this was different. He wasn't trying to gleam an answer to a predicament they typically found themselves in. He was…

Well, Bonnie couldn't say for certain what he was trying to do.

Stefan could see just as well in the dark as he could in the light. In fact his preference was night for obvious reasons. What many wouldn't guess about his kind was that sunlight irritated his eyes and interfered with his vision. Because his eyesight was so acute, the sunlight made everything far too bright and difficult to stare at for long periods of time. Yet even if this moment were taking place during the light of day, Stefan would have had difficulty with looking away.

Bonnie had such an interesting face and it wasn't until now that he was noticing little nuances and inconsistencies. She did not have a symmetrical face, but her features were attractive and alluring, drawing a person in, making you want to get to know her. She had beautiful green eyes with gold flecks around the pupils that in certain light made them appear hazel. When she smiled, which was such a scarcity these days, her high cheekbones became prominent, which made her entire face light up, causing her skin to glow. Simply put he couldn't look away.

A minute had lapsed by and then five.

Stefan thought it might be weird to ask her permission to kiss her, but he knew Bonnie would have serious reservations. The main one being he was the ex-boyfriend of her best friend. She might welcome it and then she might not. Then there was the fact that they weren't dating. Bonnie didn't come off as the type of girl to just go around kissing random guys because she could. Yes, he wasn't a random guy but a friend, something she needed more than a hook up.

And Stefan wasn't just interested in hooking up. He was a firm believer in settling down with one person, not a multitude of people. He obviously wasn't like most guys thinking that the muscle between his legs was what defined him as a man. It identified him as one, but it took more than sowing his oats to make him a man. A true man stuck to his woman, loved her hard, protected her, and kept his integrity in tact no matter what.

So he had to play this very carefully. Stefan could admit that he liked Bonnie. She was fun to be around when she wasn't worrying about something, and little by little she had drawn him back into the land of the living. He had so much to thank her for, and well maybe he could kiss her as a way to say "thank you".

_Or, you could buy her a fruit basket, _he thought sardonically.

Never before did Bonnie wish she was a telepath. She wanted to hear Stefan's thoughts, wanted to know what he was thinking because she was starting to grow not only uncomfortable under his gaze, but a little concerned.

Stefan shifted, placing both hands on the wall effectively blocking Bonnie in. She swallowed hard because the move brought his body just that much closer to hers.

It had been months since the last time she stood this close to a man. She ruled out Klaus whispering lies and truths into her ear when he kidnapped her for an entire afternoon to un-bind his siblings' lives. She hadn't wanted his nearness, was revolted by his very presence and wish she did have the power to pulverize him into dust. But Stefan's close proximity sent a delicious rush through her system animating everything she long thought to be dead.

His scent, whatever it was, was all Bonnie could breathe. Stefan was closer now, his lips just mere inches over hers.

Bonnie tilted her head up appropriately, her gaze swinging like a pendulum as they went from his eyes to his lips to his eyes again. Slowly they drifted closed when Stefan cleared the distance between them capturing her parched lips between his, massaging the tender folds of her mouth, before slipping an eager tongue inside.

She latched her arms around his torso pulling herself flush against Stefan. He dropped his hands from the wall and wound them around Bonnie's middle, holding her, crushing her next to him.

Bonnie angled her head for a better fit as Stefan devoured her lips like a man starved. Their tongues probed one another, teasing, and twisting as if they were attempting to tie a cherry stem.

Shamelessly the seat of her panties was beginning to dampen and she felt that hard nudge of Stefan's erection pressing against her stomach.

Rationality was telling her to stop, pump her brakes, but the hormonal side of Bonnie was egging her to see who could get undressed the quickest.

Her mouth was sweet like tasting the inside of a honeydew melon. He gobbled her up, let out months practically a year of sexual frustration into that kiss leaving her lips raw, chapped, and eager for more.

Slowly he withdrew, tucking his lips into his mouth, keeping his eyes closed to savor every distinctive taste he was able to gleam from her kiss.

With a modicum of space between them, Bonnie's eyes were slumberous and she wondered what would happen next. Her loins were throbbing, her palms were burning, and she couldn't get her mind to focus on anything outside of the fact that she just made out with Stefan Salvatore and enjoyed every single minute of it. She had never kissed a vampire before and didn't think they were capable of tenderness since they could crush a human skull with barely any effort. But Stefan had been tender, achingly so, and she wanted to relive the experience.

Bonnie wanted to touch his face, to feel his skin under her fingertips. So very tentatively she cupped his cheek causing his eyes to spring open in surprise. Her fingers left behind a blazing trail that made his non-existent heartbeat pound.

Stefan cleared his throat. "You're lips…are so soft."

His compliment made her blush. "So are yours."

Stefan quirked his head to the side in that special way only he knew how that made him look adorable and not lost. "You sound surprised."

"I just thought…the rest of you is hard…I mean," her cheeks were on fire. "That didn't come out right."

Stefan shifted a bit on his feet hoping to adjust his "hard" member so it wouldn't be pressing so demanding against the fly of his jeans. "It's okay, I know what you meant."

Bonnie grew silent again. She was really out of practice when it came to flirting, and being flirtatious. She had no witty remarks lined up. She could barely put two sentences together. One kiss shouldn't have reduced her to this.

Yet it was quite a kiss. In fact she could still feel Stefan's lips moving over hers, and she wanted to kiss him again, yet was unsure if it was right or appropriate.

Stefan brushed her cheek with his knuckles. So far there wasn't a part of Bonnie that he had been able to touch that wasn't soft like cotton candy. He wrapped his hand around the back of her neck, and pulled her forward, this time bypassing the gentle, exploratory play, but taking her mouth with force. Teeth clashed, Bonnie moaned to which Stefan greedily slurped up every last sound he was able to elicit from her mouth. The blood in his body pumped furiously throughout him.

Bonnie couldn't breathe, and she didn't want to breathe. Not when Stefan was kissing her like a man possessed. Her back hit the wall, Stefan's hands were cupping her face, keeping her complacent and at his mercy. He nipped her lips and licked the ache away with his tongue.

Slowly the inferno began to die down until a shimmer was going between them. Now it was Bonnie's turn to keep her eyes closed as she drew her bottom lip into her mouth.

After she collected herself, she stared up at Stefan who had been unable to look away from her.

"It's late," Bonnie said when the silence continued between them.

Stefan frowned. Was that her way of saying she wanted him to leave? Perhaps he came on too strong, initiated things too quickly.

"You want me to buzz off?" he tried to joke but couldn't hide the disappointment in his voice.

"NO!" Bonnie was quick to respond. "I mean…it's late. You don't have to go all the way back home. You can stay…here."

"Are you sure? What would your dad say about a strange guy sleeping in his house?"

To that Bonnie's eyes went heavenward. "My dad is out of town therefore making what he has to say invalid at the moment. I mean…you don't have to stay if you don't want-,"

"I'd love too," Stefan silenced her protestations. "Where do you want me?"

Bonnie gulped. That was a loaded question.

Feasibly, he could sleep on the couch, on the floor in her room, stay in the extra bedroom.

Her bed.

Heat lacerated through Bonnie again making her throat dry and her tongue stick to the roof of her mouth.

"Ah, there's an extra bedroom," she hedged.

"Where's your room?"

Bonnie's head was beginning to feel disconnected from the rest of her body. She pointed in the general direction of the staircase. "Up that way."

Bonnie stood rooted to her spot as Stefan turned off the TV plunging the room in total darkness. He was nothing more than a shadowy silhouette as he approached her and reached for her hand, locking their fingers together and leading the way to the stairs. Stefan took a sample of the air and picked out which room was Bonnie's despite the fact all the doors were closed.

He easily found the light switch and flipped it on. Bonnie blinked against the sudden brightness attacking her eyes.

"How did you know this was my room?"

Stefan tapped his nose. "I'm not a very good vampire if I can't differentiate scents."

Bonnie said nothing as she moved around her room looking for discarded items that might leave her feeling embarrassed if Stefan found them like bras, panties, tampons. She dashed around her room trying her best to make it as presentable as possible while he hung out next to her tall bureau trying his best not to rifle through her stuff.

Once the room was clean to her satisfaction Bonnie invited him to get comfortable on her full size bed.

Her room was girly but not little girl-ish. There were no posters of topless actors or singers on her walls. Bonnie had exactly three teddy bears, one was missing an eye and they sat clumped together on an overstuffed chair that was caddy corner to a bookshelf. Her room was eclectic, befitting her personality, and smelled of wild flowers and expensive chocolate. He watched as Bonnie looked through a drawer for her night clothes, and then she disappeared inside the connecting bathroom.

Stefan slipped out of his boots and placed them at the foot the bed. He thought about removing his shirt, he was wearing a wife beater underneath, and then decided to just go for it.

He didn't climb under the covers, but did pull one corner of them back for Bonnie to climb under. Stefan propped himself up against the wrought iron head board, crossed his legs at the ankles, and then just looked around until Bonnie emerged from the bathroom.

Nervously Bonnie nibbled her bottom lip unsure of waited for her on the other side. An image of Stefan dressed down to his birthday suit assaulted her mind, wouldn't leave her alone, but she knew he was too much of a gentleman to go that route. She eyed her reflection after brushing her teeth. She was dressed in an oversized T-shirt from her dad's Alma Mater, Morehouse College, that she paired with basketball shorts. She didn't look tempting in the least. The final thing she did was slap her hair in a ponytail.

She threw open the bathroom door and found Stefan looking more than comfortable on her bed. Part of her frowned, inwardly, because he wasn't completely shirtless. She got a good view of his arms, but that was about it. Cutting out both the light to the bathroom and overhead light, she crossed over the room, and slid under the comforter and sheets.

Wordlessly Stefan and Bonnie spooned, his chin resting on the crown of her head.

Bonnie melted into him, sinking into the crevices of his body as if they were the Ying and Yang. "Good night, Stefan."

"Good night, Bonnie."

Bonnie twisted and pecked his lips before shifting back into position.

For the first time in a long time Stefan finally got a full night of sleep.

* * *

Caroline calmly sipped her Coke as she crowd surfed, but her eyes would always travel back to the twosome who was too busy cheesing and grinning at one another. She sat her drink down when Bonnie finally tore herself away from the dashing Stefan "I'm Mr. Lonely" Salvatore.

Bonnie slid into the padded booth across from Caroline and helped herself to her friend's chilly cheese fries.

"So when can I expect my wedding invitation in the mail?" Caroline chortled.

Bonnie nearly choked on a fry. She frowned disapprovingly at Caroline. "What _are _you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the fact you and Stefan haven't been able to tear yourselves away from one another until now. You couldn't possibly notice this but whenever you move, his eyes follow you, and vise versa. It's like the two of you are afraid to let the other out of sight in fear you'll be abducted and anally probed or something."

All Bonnie could do was laugh. You had to love Caroline based off the fact she was one of the few people who actually said _exactly_ what was on her mind.

"Weren't you the one saying that the two of us hooking up would be cute?"

"Well, yeah," Caroline shrugged and shoveled a couple of fries in her mouth. "I said cute but you two are becoming nauseating. I've barely touched any of these fries because of the stomach ache I got going after watching you two."

"It's really not as serious as you're trying to make it, Care. We like hanging out together. Ain't nothing wrong with that."

"You're absolutely right," Caroline agreed. "However, I know you, Bennett and I'm sure at some point you will begin to feel a tremendous amount of guilt for liking Stefan as more than just a friend." Caroline reached over and clasped Bonnie's hand. "Don't be. Remember Elena had her cake and she's eating it too so you have no reason to feel bad about your feelings."

Bonnie nodded and would take Caroline's words under advisement. She saw Caroline stiffen, narrow her eyes, and pull her hand away as she sat against the padded booth.

Dread filled Bonnie's stomach. Only two people who walked around Mystic Falls could cause that kind of reaction from her blonde friend.

Very tentatively Bonnie looked over her shoulder and sure enough Damon and Elena just entered the premises. Damon was helping Elena with her coat, trying to appear to be a gentleman. Elena spotted them. A smile bloomed over her face as she began to approach.

_If you follow I will smite thee, _Bonnie was directing those thoughts through her eyes towards Damon. Who naturally fell into step behind his neophyte girlfriend.

"Hey Care, hey Bon."

"Hi, Elena," Bonnie and Caroline mumbled in unison without an ounce of enthusiasm.

Elena tried not to let the smile on her face drop after receiving such a welcome greeting from her friends. Briefly she flashed her doe-eyes to Damon who was examining something on his shirt.

"Well we're just here to get something quick to eat before going to see a movie," Elena rambled on.

"Interesting," Caroline said. "Well, we don't want to keep you from your dinner."

Elena caught the hint that she was being brushed off and figured to save face and find a table faraway. She did stumble a bit when she saw Stefan concentrating very hard on his next shot as he played pool. Despite the fact they were no longer together, she still cared a great deal about him, and did miss him. But that part of her life was over. Sadly.

Damon kept quiet and didn't say a single word to Caroline and Bonnie which was the way they preferred it. He led Elena away.

Bonnie chomped down on a few more fries before wiping her hands clean and then rejoining Stefan at the pool table.

From the noticeable tick going off in his jaw and the rigidness to his shoulders, Stefan was very much aware of who was in the building.

"Ready for me to wipe the floor with you?" she asked with false cheer peppering her words.

Stefan pulled his lips back from his teeth. He wasn't trying to smile. He shook his head back and forth, ready to leave. Bonnie approached Stefan, touching him on the forearm.

"You don't have to pretend, Bonnie."

"I'm not pretending at anything, Stefan. We can't run and hide every time we see them," she stared pointedly at him. "Now, let's play."

Stefan was about to do just that when he heard a very familiar song begin to play softly in the background. It was "The Light" by The Album Leaf. He heard it while watching that episode of _Scandal _with Bonnie.

He sat down the pool stick, approached Bonnie, and took her by the hand pulling her forward. "One minute," he said.

Bonnie stared at him curiously until the reference clicked. She smiled and felt her nose tingle because she wanted to cry. "One minute."

And for one minute they just stood next to the pool table and stared at one another.

He was giving her what she wanted, want she needed, and that was to feel like the most important factor in his life, in this moment.

Chapter end.

**A/N: My original plan was to start this chapter off with Damon's perspective, but I wasn't feeling him at the moment. This entire chapter was pretty much inspired by 1x06 of Scandal that airs on ABC. If you are not familiar with the show I suggest you watch it! As much as other shows try to show "chemistry" between their characters this show pulls it off pretty effortlessly and its done without a whole bunch of meaningless jargon. I also wanted to incorporate how Bonnie viewed herself in relationships and why she constantly lucks out in life in general and how that affects her as a young woman. Will Stefan and Damon have it out at some point in this, I'm sure they will. But I hope you guys enjoyed it. Who knows what might happen next. Love you babies.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Hi guys. Sorry for such a prolonged delay in an update. Other stories came and hijacked my brain so I neglected this puppy until finally I had no idea where I wanted this to go, or what I wanted to have happen. To me, this chapter is kind of all over the place and I hope it makes sense. Had a lot of real life interruptions while trying to write. Sorry for any typos and missing words. I'll try to clean it up later. Enjoy.**

***I found that pic of Kat and Paul on Tumblr just after updating this so the credit goes to whoever took it. Please don't sue me for using it*  
**

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

It had been a while since he hunted. Too much time had passed since he ran through the forest uninhibited. Not running for his life, but to run for the pure joy of accelerating his body through time and matter. Stefan sometimes could forget about the joy that could be found in being immortal. Too much time had been wasted on feeling guilt and remorse for all the lives he's taken and ruined. He didn't have to hurt anyone, not if he really wanted to. He could suppress that side of him that liked destroying human flesh, of ripping his teeth through sinewy muscle in order to reach the crimson lakes and streams that flowed through the human body.

Was he reformed? Sometimes Stefan liked to think that he was, but then a little reminder would pop up and tell him he hadn't changed from his early days of turning.

Sitting perched on a tree branch about twenty feet up in the air, Stefan listened with his acute hearing to see if he could detect a nocturnal creature scuttling about. Animal blood lost all its appeal once he adopted a careful human blood diet. But hunting the smaller, lesser rodents kept his other senses sharp. There was nothing worse than a vampire being taken unawares, and it had happened to him enough. He had to be better, smarter, and faster because in the town he lived in, and the associations he kept, danger was never more than a stone's throw away.

To the east of his position he heard a rabbit. One corner of his pale pink lips lifted in a wolfish grin.

Jumping from the tree to the ground, Stefan landed soundlessly on the forest floor. Rabbits could detect vibration, so it took extreme skill on Stefan's part not to disturb the earth with his landing. Luckily for him, the rabbit was preoccupied looking for its own late-night snack.

The moon was barely visible. Clouds covered it. It didn't matter because Stefan could see better in the night than he could during day. Everything stood out to him in high definition.

Stefan flew over the ground, his feet hardly making contact with it. He constantly shifted his trajectory to avoid smashing into the trees which were bountiful in this part of the woods. His presence must have spooked the rabbit because it took off, running for its life, darting around trees and shrubs like a born sprinter, but Stefan was faster.

Sliding to a stop he caught the critter in his hand, held it up, ignoring its squirming little body. His eyes burned red, his fangs elongated, Stefan brought the rabbit closer, could feel its fluffy fur tickle his lips, and then…

He stopped.

It wasn't hunger he was trying to sate tonight. It was something else. Something he didn't want to put a name on.

Setting the rabbit free, Stefan blew out a ragged breath. He turned on the heels of his boots and marched off the way he entered the woods. Stuffing his hands deep in the pockets of his leather jacket, Stefan hung his head.

He couldn't explain why he was feeling…well conflicted. Two weeks had passed since he stopped by Bonnie's and they shared their first kiss. It had been unexpected and he enjoyed it very much, but at the end of the day he couldn't escape the irrational feeling that he may have taken advantage of her. She had been feeling down about her failed love life, and she needed comfort. Stefan was all about shouldering someone's pain as his own. With Bonnie she had been no different, but she _was_ different. She wasn't some passing female whose name and face he would forget with time. In her own way, Bonnie had carved out a tiny piece in his heart. She was a friend, and a confidant, but she was beginning to mean more to him.

Stefan hadn't exactly hammered out a contract saying he wouldn't grow close to anyone ever again. Inwardly he had locked away his heart and stored away the key. Bonnie was making him remember what it felt like to really live and not just wake up in the morning and exist. He liked making her laugh, making her frustrated when he purposely acted aloof. In short, he simply liked being around her.

But, and there was always a but lurking around to do catastrophic damage, Bonnie didn't know the full extent of his part in what happened to Abby.

She might have brushed it under the rug, processed it in her own way, but Bonnie didn't know that _he _had been the one to lose the coin toss that night, and it had been him selected to do the evil deed of killing Bonnie, Abby, or them both.

Plus she didn't know of the despicable way he and Damon came up with making that decision. If she got wind of this, Stefan would lose more than her respect and friendship; he very well might lose his life.

So as each day passed and they learned more about each other, that one little fact would sometimes tap dance on his conscience. When he first moved back to Mystic Falls, Stefan had been vague on purpose with Elena because he had a damning secret that could never see the light of day. Yet he learned that when you say you loved someone, you trusted that person, and showed them all your sides, not just the good, but the bad as well. Elena reacted the way he knew she would. She went off screaming into the night, but then, over time, she learned that Stefan was one of the good ones, that he wanted nothing but the best for her, and so they were able to get past that hurdle and move on.

Naturally there were roadblocks and obstacles along the way, but their love had proven strong enough to withstand all of that.

Unfortunately it hadn't been strong enough to withstand the tsunami better known as Damon Salvatore.

Damon had promised Stefan a lifetime of misery. And had delivered thus far. They might have been able to work out some of their problems, and came to a respite, but if Damon was feeling particularly spiteful, he could easily go to Bonnie and shed light on how that night her mother was turned all came about. Bonnie knew a few details here and there, but she had shown no interest in digging for more information. If Stefan was going to call himself her friend then she needed to know the full truth.

However, Stefan knew that if he told the truth he stood the chance of losing her, and quite simply he was tired of losing people.

Stepping through the woods he was a little surprised to see Bonnie's car parked in his driveway. A smile blossomed on his face despite his early musings. He quickly went inside. Stefan found Bonnie rummaging around in the kitchen, making herself feel more than at home.

Stefan hung back for a while and just observed her. She was dressed appropriately for the weather wearing a comfortable pair of boot cut jeans, and a fitted knit sweater. Although it was technically spring, the temperature at night still plunged into the low forties.

"Are you planning on staring at me all night?" Bonnie looked up from chopping vegetables.

He snorted and walked fully into the kitchen and joined her at the center island. "I was seeing how long it would take you to figure out I was around."

"Well, you might want to tighten up on your cat burglar skills. That front door of yours could use some serious WD-40."

"I'll keep that in mind. But I think I should be the one calling the cops. You did enter my property without permission."

Bonnie pursed her lips. "It's not breaking and entering if the homeowner didn't bother to lock his front door. People do like to steal, you know."

"Yeah," Stefan replied dryly. "So you decided to break in and cook dinner?" he asked skeptically.

Bonnie dumped the freshly chopped vegetables into a silver frying pan. "That sounds about right. And you can act offended all you like but I know you're going to eat."

"So what's on the menu?"

"Chipotle chicken flatbread pizza."

"Sounds ambitious," Stefan remarked. "Need some help?"

Bonnie shrugged. Taking that as an invitation to join her, Stefan hung up his leather jacket, rolled up the sleeves to his shirt, washed his hands, and picked up a knife. The two of them worked around one another as if this they had done so for years.

An hour later they were seated at Stefan's newly purchased kitchen table making "mmm-hmm" noises.

Wiping her fingers clean on a napkin, Bonnie stared at Stefan from across the table. "You want to know the real reason I came over? I wanted to borrow a book."

"A book?"

"Yeah. I was looking for something interesting to read because I feel like I've read everything at the library. Yeah, I know it's not the most exciting reason to show up at someone's house, but I figured you've been around for a while…"

Stefan rolled his eyes.

"So you might have something in your collection I haven't read."

"What are you looking for?"

"Everything I saw looked like the original edition of some great classic," Bonnie smirked. "You wouldn't happen to have any Zane novels would you?"

A surprised look overtook Stefan's face. "I didn't know you were into smut."

Bonnie's cheeks reddened. "Usually I'm not, but since my love life is as barren as the desert, why not read about other people having a good time."

Stefan toyed with the balled up napkin that was in his hand. He was probably a lot more old fashioned than most people, okay who was he kidding, he was tons more old fashioned than other people, and didn't really read smut or viewed porn. In fact it made him uncomfortable and left him feeling violated and embarrassed in a weird way. He didn't begrudge anyone if that's what they were into, but Stefan would rather participate in those kinds of activities with someone he cared about than read about it and/or watch it.

He really didn't take Bonnie as someone who read erotica, but then again, Stefan didn't know everything about her.

"Or," Stefan said at last, "you could find someone to do those things with."

Two eyes met across the table. Bonnie felt her entire body blush. She wasn't quite sure if Stefan was offering or merely making a suggestion. Clearing her throat she was the first to look away. Bonnie was glad things between herself and Stefan hadn't fallen into an awkward phase after they kissed and he spent the night with her. That night she had been in need of companionship that didn't come with the same body parts as hers. Stefan had been the salve she needed to her wounded femininity. Part of her felt they moved too fast, or moved into an arena they had no business going in the first place.

He was her best friend's ex after all. Bonnie certainly didn't want to be the rebound girl. Stefan was still processing the fact that his girlfriend was now dating his brother. He could deny all he liked that he was over them both, but Bonnie knew that was a kick to the teeth, jab to the ribs, stomp to his heart and groining that wasn't going to evaporate overnight.

Bonnie did question what it was she wanted from Stefan. She was fine with rebuilding their friendship. In all honesty, she couldn't really say they were solid friends before that fateful night her life had been napalmed yet again. Bonnie worked alongside Stefan and tolerated his presence in Elena's life. She trusted him to a certain degree, but they weren't intimate friends where they shared details of their lives with one another. Bonnie always respected the fact that Stefan had been crazy in love with Elena and tried to interfere as little as possible. She was happy he had been, at least back in the beginning, the positive influence Elena needed in order to move on from her parents' sudden death.

And then, Stefan traded his life to go off with Klaus, and the old Stefan never came back.

Despite all of that, Bonnie never actually gave up hope that things might go back to the way they were before. She wasn't being naïve about the situation, but optimistic.

Unfortunately that misplaced optimism came back to bite her severely in the ass.

Bonnie switched her thoughts. Certain wounds were still too fresh and raw and rubbing salt into them proved to be more harmful than good. So she thought back to how things between she and Stefan shifted. They were friends, but friends who kissed? Bonnie wasn't so sure if that was a good idea especially if Stefan wasn't completely over Elena.

She would not be made a fool of twice.

It went without saying that she was done with Jeremy. He might have drunk dialed her a few times post-break up, to which Bonnie hung up on him; however, he never made any kind of effort to get her back. So that just proved to Bonnie that he never loved her, that Anna truly was the only girl he loved, and if that were the case, he should just leave her the hell alone.

"I would be inclined to do so, Mr. Salvatore if there was an unlimited stock of male real estate around."

Stefan shifted in his seat. Up close Bonnie was beautiful, from a distance Bonnie was beautiful, but he always felt he could get a truer sense of her character when he was right next to her. Bonnie had her eyes focused on the plate in front of her, yet Stefan knew that she was watching him from her peripheral vision.

"No one at school has caught your eye?" he questioned.

Inwardly, Bonnie smiled. "Most of the good ones are taken."

"And the rest?"

Bonnie made eye contact then. "They've been burned and have no interest in being serious with anyone else."

"Is that the general consensus or are you speculating?"

"Perhaps it's just the cynic in me talking. What about you, Mr. Salvatore? I don't exactly see you rushing off to get ready for a date."

Stefan didn't respond to the accusation until he made a steeple of his hands, and rested his elbows on the table. "I guess my reasoning would be yours. The lack of female real estate."

For some odd reason that stung, yet Bonnie ignored it. She cleared her throat.

Stefan got the distinct impression that he said the wrong thing. From the way a crease formed in the middle of Bonnie's forehead, and the fact she was putting her full concentration on dissecting her flatbread with her fork and knife, it was pretty safe to assume that his comment was a slap to the face.

Yet what he said wasn't the truth at all. For weeks Stefan felt as if they had been giving one another mixed signals. They never really talked about the kiss or what it meant, or if it meant anything more than wanting to give each other comfort. And since they never sat down to hash out anything, and Bonnie didn't reprimand him for taking liberties, Stefan figured all was well.

Perhaps that was his mistake in thinking he could brush something like that off. Pushing his plate to the side, he kept his eyes trained on Bonnie until finally she looked up.

"What?" she asked.

"We never really talked about the other night. The kiss."

Bonnie shifted a bit in her seat. Her mouth suddenly dried up. She reached for her glass of water and took a hearty sip. "What about it?"

"Did you like it?" Stefan asked point blank with no fillers.

"Ah…it…was…it wasn't terrible."

"What does that mean?"

Bonnie sighed. Should she go with the clichéd answer of: it was nice but it's not going to happen again? Or should she admit that she liked kissing him, liked feeling his lips on hers, but more to the matter, loved the mating dance their tongues performed and wouldn't mind if they tried it out again, preferably while lying horizontal on a bed. Fully clothed of course.

Yet in the back of her mind, Bonnie knew she couldn't ask for a repeat performance because she still viewed Stefan as Elena's. Yes, those two hadn't been together in a little over a month, but…Bonnie was having a difficult time looking at Stefan as only that: Stefan Salvatore with no emotional attachments to Elena Gilbert.

It was amazing how that girl could still be the center of everything even when she wasn't present.

"It means…I enjoyed it. It was nice and what I needed that night…"

"But?"

"Is it really going to lead anywhere?"

Stefan sat back in his chair. Though he hadn't talked much about Elena to Bonnie or to anyone, he speculated she thought he was still in love with Elena. Yes, he had moments where he missed the hell out of her, and walked around aimlessly warring with himself not to call her just to hear the sound of her voice. But there was the other more dominate side to Stefan who had already let her and the love they used to share go. He was taking things day-by-day. Did that mean he was ready to move on? Not necessarily. Did it mean he wanted to be around someone who could make him forget his pain and start living again? Absolutely.

"Bonnie…I hope you know I'm not the sort of guy who just kisses a girl because he can."

"I know this much."

"And I wasn't kissing you because I felt sorry for you."

Okay, this was going somewhere Bonnie wasn't sure she was ready to go just yet.

"So why did you kiss me?"

Stefan leaned forward until there was very little room left between them. Naturally Bonnie felt the urge to back up, but she remained right where she was.

"Because I wanted to."

Silence.

Stefan had a question of his own. "Why did you kiss me?"

Bonnie brushed her fingers over her neck in a nervous gesture. She hated feeling as if she were being reduced to a prepubescent girl with her first major crush.

"Because I wanted to."

The smile that glossed over Stefan's face was contagious. "I see we're on the same page."

"Yeah, but what does this really all mean?"

Stefan rose from the table, collecting his empty plate. He reached for Bonnie's and she handed it over. "What do you want it to mean?"

"Could you stop answering my question with a question?" Bonnie said and got to her feet as well. She grabbed their water glasses and headed over to the sink.

Wordlessly they started cleaning the kitchen, filling the sink with sudsy water, and began washing the dishes.

"I'm at a place right now where I just want to get back to the basics, you know." Stefan handed Bonnie a handful of silverware to rinse off. "I don't have to wake up in the morning wondering if something bad is going to happen to the woman I love, or how will my brother try to wedge his way into my personal life and screw it all up. I'm liberated," Stefan tossed his head back.

Bonnie giggled.

Stefan continued. "I'm enjoying getting to know myself again because you know better than anyone how truly fucked up I was."

"Yeah I did know," Bonnie stated. "I was beginning to think I'd never get to see the old you ever again. The Stefan who was respectful to my grandmother, who helped get me out of that whole I fell down. The Stefan who fed me his blood after his brother took a bite out of me."

"Our friendship certainly didn't start off being conventional did it?"

"No," Bonnie agreed. "It didn't. And then everything changed."

"Yet it's changing again," Stefan was looking down at Bonnie. Carefully she met his eyes yet couldn't read the emotion coming from them.

Bonnie ran her tongue over her bottom lip which caught Stefan's attention. "What is everything changing into?" she questioned.

"Whatever we want it to be, I suppose."

"Stefan, I feel like we've been talking to each other in circles," Bonnie took a step away from the sink and ran the back of her hand across her forehead.

Taking his hands out of the sink, Stefan shifted closer to Bonnie until she was pressed against the sink. He boxed her in by placing his hands along the counter. There was still a sliver of space separating them, but if Bonnie took just a fraction of a step forward, her chest would collide with Stefan's.

"Perhaps that's the problem. We spend so much of our time _talking_ instead of _doing _what we feel inside. Its actions that changes things, not words. A speech is designed to get people fired up, but its actions that evoke change. So that being said…"

Stefan grabbed Bonnie by the hips, lifted her until her feet cleared the floor, and promptly deposited her on the counter's edge.

An undignified squeal escaped from her lips. "What are you doing?" Bonnie squeaked, clutching on to Stefan's shoulders for dear life.

"I'm putting my words into action," he smiled.

Bonnie grew considerably worried. Little red flags were popping up all over the place and she wondered if things between herself and Stefan were moving at warp speed. Neither one had confessed if they had feelings for each other, yet here she was, sitting on a sink with Stefan firmly wedged between her legs. This moment would be romantic downright erotic _if _they were exclusively dating or in a committed relationship.

Call her idealistic, but Bonnie was a firm believer in love and romance. No, she didn't have a ton of experience with either one, but there was a vision in her head about how she wanted to be treated by the guy she had feelings for. She wanted him to be sweet, but also street tough, wise, humorous, and an all around good guy. If such a person existed Bonnie hadn't come across him, but as she stared into Stefan's chameleon eyes, she was well aware of the fact that he did fit the mold of what she wanted.

Bonnie quickly discarded those thoughts. She might have felt an inkling of an attraction towards Stefan, it didn't mean he shared the same feelings. Oh, sure his current location between her legs notwithstanding, Bonnie was a warm body that Stefan could use as a way of escaping his pain. Bonnie didn't want to provide that kind of refuge for him. She was done being used. Tired of being made to feel like she wasn't good enough compared to the other chicks who walked around town. She had enough of being humiliated and being made a fool out of.

That's why she couldn't just go with the flow of the moment.

Stefan, the one she knew in the past, would never do something like this with her. Bonnie acknowledged that the Stefan before her was vastly different, and she liked him, but it wasn't enough to convince her that she should take a chance.

Stefan could almost taste her hesitation. Bonnie didn't think he was being serious. Yet, Stefan could admit that he hadn't given her a definitive reason to take him seriously. He wasn't Damon. He didn't hop from one friend to another. He didn't use sex as a way to cope with his crushed feelings and ego. Stefan took life too seriously, just like Bonnie. Here was his chance to have a serious moment but not make it into a life or death situation.

"Has anyone told you, you think too much?" Stefan asked with humor dancing in his eyes.

"I might have heard that in the past only because everyone around me was running around acting like idiots. Someone had to be the mastermind behind things."

"Touché," Stefan agreed. "What is it you want, Bonnie?"

"Could you narrow that down, be a bit more specific?"

"Certainly," Stefan paused. "What would make you happy right now?"

The girl in question thought for a moment. Lots of things would make her happy. Choosing one was like choosing your all time favorite TV couple. Damn near impossible.

Bonnie nibbled a corner of her lip, drawing Stefan's attention once more to her mouth. She really had no idea how unintentionally sexy she could be. He may have behaved as if Elena was his end all be all, but Stefan still had eyes and he still admired beautiful women from afar. There were several times where he caught himself staring at Bonnie, and no it wasn't during the times she did magic. He would stare at her if she did something different with her hair, or wore more makeup than usual, or changed her perfume, or wore jeans that should have been illegal in all fifty states.

"I want you to tell me the truth. Are you still in love with Elena?"

Stefan hadn't prepared himself to answer that question. He knew someone would ask him at some point, he just prayed it would never come up. Stefan decided to establish a neutral zone between them. He stepped out from between Bonnie's legs.

He scrubbed a hand across his forehead. "Some days I feel like I hate her more than anything else, and there are other days where I feel like I'm still…in love with her that it makes it almost impossible to sit still. I think about her when I shouldn't. I do still worry about her safety," he shook his head at his weakness. "I know it's not my job anymore but old habits die hard. I'm mad. I'm hurt. But I'm trying to heal and move on."

Bonnie nodded. The love that was shared between Elena and Stefan wouldn't just evaporate overnight.

Bonnie hopped down from the counter doing her level best not to feel awkward or exposed. "Thank you for being honest." Pause. "I should get home. It's late."

Stefan reached for her slightly dampened hand. "Bon…this doesn't mean…"

She silenced him by placing her index finger against his lips. Bonnie's green eyes dropped to his mouth, that mouth which had haunted her dreams for days on end. "It's okay."

And there she went, forever letting someone off the hook. Bonnie had asked for Stefan's honesty. He obliged her and she wasn't sure why she expected to hear anything different than what she already speculated.

No matter how badly someone was hurt because they loved Elena, and no matter who or what they lost, they would never be able to fully abolish their love for her. Bonnie grudgingly had to admit she fell into this category. She wasn't going to use her love as an excuse to forget the things which happened to her during her quest to keep her best friend alive. Bonnie didn't nor wanted to relive that pain. However, that didn't mean she wanted to be slapped in the face with it either.

"Tell me what you're thinking," Stefan requested.

Pulling on her inner goddess, Bonnie stared up at Stefan. "I'm thinking that I should get home. I'm thinking we should put the brakes on whatever might be or could be going on between us until we both cope with the things we lost due to loving Elena."

It was a little difficult for Stefan to swallow. He didn't want to lose Bonnie. She had become such a staple in his life. "Is that what you _really_ want?"

"No, it's not something I want, but it's something we have to do. You're hurting and like you said, you need to heal. Getting involved in a fling will only complicate things. If you feel I'm jumping the gun, I'm sorry, but I have to look out for myself. I'm like you, Stefan. I don't go around kissing someone just because I can. That's not who I am. That's not who I want to be."

Stefan nodded and then stared down at his shoes. "So does this mean we can no longer hang out?"

Bonnie twisted her fingers and looked away. "I don't know. I like where we are. We're at a good place and I don't want to lose that."

"Neither do I."

"So I guess we'll just continue to play it by ear," Bonnie said sheepishly a corner of her mouth lifting into an uncertain smile.

"All right. Well, _friend,_" and Stefan may have said that with more edge than he intended, "let me walk you to your car."

Ambiguity settled and pressed down between Bonnie's shoulders. Had she made the right decision in pulling the plug prematurely on what could have been the start of something great? No, Bonnie thought mentally as she followed Stefan through the kitchen, past the living room, and out the front door. She was doing this because he wasn't over his ex and Bonnie didn't want to be the rebound girl.

Stefan opened up her car door. Bonnie stood for a moment wondering if it would be appropriate to ask for a hug.

They must have programmed their brains to be on the same wavelength at some point, because Stefan pulled her into his arms. Bonnie snuggled as closely as she could, inhaling his distinctive scent, embedding it into her memory.

Stefan kissed the crown of Bonne's head. Already he felt like he was losing her. But essentially they were taking the high road, giving one another space to figure out the junk in their heads.

"Call me to let me know you made it home safe," he spoke quietly.

"I will."

"Thanks for dinner," Stefan smiled in memory of what he had been doing out in the woods before he went home. "I'm glad you stopped by because I had been two seconds from eating Bugs Bunny."

Bonnie snorted. "You're back on the animal blood diet?"

"Not really. I was testing my skills. Things have been quiet I was afraid I was losing my edge."

"Oh. And how have you been managing the people blood diet?" Bonnie questioned tentatively well aware of the fact it was a sore subject for him.

Stefan rocked on his heels, his arms folded across his chest. "I drink a little everyday. Going cold turkey never seems to work for me."

"Going cold turkey never works for anyone. You're a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for, Stefan."

"I do what I have to so I won't hurt anyone. I don't want to go down anymore dark roads. Been there, done that, and it ain't worth shit."

Bonnie smiled. "You're right about that." A thought popped into Bonnie's head. "Have you had your daily quotient today?"

Dark eyebrows drew together in speculation. "Why?"

Bonnie nibbled her lower lip again. If she kept doing that, Stefan would not be held responsible for his actions.

"The only experience I had with a vampire drinking my blood was a painful one. I wondered…could it be pleasurable…at all? And I know I'm the _last _person who should be thinking along those lines, but I can't help but be curious."

"Hmm," Stefan tapped his chin with his index finger. "It all depends on the vampire. It can be painful, it can be seductive, it can be erotic; it can be all those things simultaneously."

The air shifted between them becoming charged. Stefan approached Bonnie, slowly, methodically. Her heart began to speed and once again, Bonnie found herself trapped between Stefan's body and an inanimate object.

His thick fingers brushed her long, curly hair away from her neck. Bonnie shivered when she felt his feather-light touch against her skin, coupled in with the cold weather outside, it was amazing her teeth wasn't chattering.

Stefan's eyes were focused on her neck. The speech he delivered to that girl Amber whom he attacked the night of the Miss Mystic Falls pageant came surging back. It seemed fitting but with some careful editing, Stefan said:

"A trained vampire always goes for the carotid artery, right here," he demonstrated what he meant by sweeping his finger along her jumping vein. Bonnie swallowed thickly. "If you puncture this just right, you can control the blood flow. It takes practice but it doesn't have to make a mess. You don't have to waste any. There's a way I can insert my fangs into your skin, and it wouldn't feel any worse than a bee sting. It'll hurt for a little while, but once your body relaxes, the blood will just flow. There wouldn't be any sucking involved. It's the sucking that hurts."

Was Bonnie wrong for being turned on by this? She certainly thought so.

They were standing so close together it was almost impossible to see where one began and the other ended. Bonnie pulled back to study Stefan's eyes. Surprisingly they were still bluish-gray.

"Are you thirsty right now?" Bonnie found herself asking.

"That's the problem, Bonnie. I'm _always _thirsty."

Bonnie's heart was really beating now. "I should probably leave then," she said.

Stefan would second that emotion although that was the absolute _last _thing he wanted her to do.

The next time he spoke, his voice was gravelly. "You probably should." Unconsciously, Stefan's finger trailed across Bonnie's chin.

"Do you want to bite me?" _Why the hell would you ask that_, Bonnie admonished herself. She felt like she had been ensnared in a web. Like a stupid ass fly.

Bonnie read the grim expression on Stefan's face.

"Among other things," he admitted.

"Okay," Bonnie replied breathlessly. "I should get going."

"You are a tease you know that," Stefan smiled, showing all his teeth which scared the crap out of Bonnie. Yet it only made him seem more dazzling yet above all of that dangerous. She could see that dear old Ripper Stefan was only moments away from making a grand appearance.

"On that note," Bonnie said, "Good night, Stefan."

"Good night, Bonnie."

_Never put your back to a predator, _Bonnie repeated over and over in her mind as she slid away from Stefan and climbed into her car.

Like a gentleman he closed her door. Bonnie gunned her engine and backed out of the driveway. Traveling down the road, she kept her eyes glued to the rearview mirror.

* * *

Bonnie lied awake in bed, unable to erase that last scene with Stefan from her mind. Why the hell would she push his buttons like that knowing how he was when it came to human blood? Had she wanted him to bite her? Did she want him to show her the difference between a good vampire bite and a bad vampire bite? Was there some sick masochistic need in her to be brutalized and punished by people she considered her friends?

She couldn't explain what came over her tonight, but Bonnie certainly didn't want it to happen ever again. She needed to stay as far away from Stefan as possible. He might have been the antithesis of Damon but in that moment he certain reminded her of that dark and overtly seductive vampire who got off on crowding people's space and making them feel uncomfortable.

Bonnie touched her neck, the side of her neck that Stefan basically had his wicked way with. Even now she could still feel his touch against her hot skin. What had she been thinking?

Clearly she hadn't been thinking with the head on her shoulders. Hormones. It had to boil down to hormones.

Yet it wasn't horniness which drove her actions. Bonnie didn't want to leave thinking that Stefan would erect a wall between them, although she had been the one to suggest they take some time to figure things out so maybe she wanted to see if there was some hope for the future.

"Ugh," Bonnie jammed her elbow in her pillow. Nothing seemed to go right or worked these days. What was she supposed to do now?

What if her behavior opened up that can of worms and Stefan was prowling the streets right now, draining people left from right?

Springing up in bed, Bonnie hastily reached for her cell phone which was charging on the end table. She scrolled through her list of contacts until she reached Stefan's name. Bonnie didn't care what time it was, he had better answer the phone, and he had better be at home alone.

What seemed like an eternity had only really been fifteen seconds. Stefan answered on the second ring. "Hey, what are you doing up? Is everything okay?"

Bonnie didn't answer right away. He still sounded like sensible Stefan but it could all be a cover up for his illicit behavior.

"I'm fine. I just wanted to say…goodnight."

"Okay," Stefan carefully enunciated the word. "Are you sure that's the only reason why you're calling me at one in the morning?"

_Was it really that late_, Bonnie thought. Sheesh she needed to get to sleep and fast because she had school in the morning.

"Yeah, Stef, I'm fine. Just couldn't sleep."

"I can come over."

"No," Bonnie said too quickly. "I mean…you don't have to. I'm about to head off to la-la land," and she faked yawned to prove her point. "I'll see you in school."

"All right. See you."

"Bye."

"Bye."

Putting her phone down, Bonnie slapped her hands over her face. Her mouth was seriously going to get her in trouble one day.

Chapter end.

**A/N: If you're wondering why I decided to put the brakes on Stefonnie, the answer is simple, they each have unresolved issues they need to deal with. In all honesty I felt they kissed too soon, but I was on a high from Scandal and wanted to incorporate that in the last chapter. I'd like for this to be a slow burn between Bonnie and Stefan. Because I've been writing so much Bamon lately I have shamelessly lost a ton of my Stefonnie love. Not saying I don't love them, my love for this ship is just not as strong as Bamon is at the moment. I can't say when the next update will come. That all depends on you guys and if you still have an interest in reading this story. I wanted to update for you so please let me know if you'd like to keep reading this story or not. All righty, I've rambled on enough. Love you guys! Thanks for reading and leaving me your thoughts.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hello Kittens. I fought hard with this chapter because I had to battle against my mounting disappointment with Stefan. We all know he's done some questionable things last season and even this season, and I've kind of allowed that to change my shipper heart towards him. In reality I would never ship him or Damon with Bonnie, but in fanfic world, I'm trying to hold on to what made me love him from the beginning. Here is the latest. Enjoy! You know me, this is long since I had you waiting forever for an update.**

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

He woke up in a cold sweat. The images were haunting him, devouring him like a plague. The guilt had bubbled up to the surface and pebbled along his skin in the form of goose bumps. Stefan Salvatore gulped for breath feeling as if someone was strangling him in his sleep.

Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, Stefan rolled until he sat up in bed and scooted back until he could rest against the headboard. The cool wood against his heated flesh was welcoming as he tried to push those images to the far recesses of his mind—only they wouldn't budge. How had his life gotten so derailed that he acted out and behaved in a manner he promised he would never divulge in again? There was so much blood on his hands they were drenched it.

If he had just let things go, let Klaus leave after he removed his compulsion, if he hadn't listened to Katherine to get angry and seek revenge for what Klaus had taken from him, none of what ensued would have happened. But nope. He had to poke the sleeping lion and as a result Bonnie lost her mother, Stefan drove away the girl he loved right into the arms of his brother, and Alaric wouldn't be hell bent on wiping vampires off the face of the earth.

This was all _his _doing.

Climbing out of bed, his loose jogging pants hanging low on his lean hips, Stefan padded barefoot downstairs to the kitchen. He retrieved a blood bag out of the fridge, ripped open the packet, and poured the contents into his favorite mug. He then stuck it in the microwave and nuked it for about thirty seconds.

It wasn't exactly ninety-eight point six but it would do.

Closing his eyes, Stefan remembered to breathe deeply before taking the first sip. If he didn't, he stood the chance of turning ravenous and devouring the whole cup and then cleaning out his months supply in a matter of minutes.

He and Caroline were set to make a trip across stateliness to replenish their stash. They couldn't continue to steal from the hospital and think no one would notice.

Gulping the hot, thick liquid down his throat, Stefan savored the taste, the smell, the rush as the blood pounded through his veins making him feel alive, alert, on top of the world. He took another massive swallow and pulled the cup away. He licked the residue off his top and bottom lip-methodically. The blood was delicious yet it did nothing to sate the guilt coiling in his belly making his abdominals contract.

Taking his mug, Stefan walked into the living room and sat down on the couch. He turned on the tube needing the noise to distract him from his thoughts.

There was a Miami Vice marathon playing on Centric. Kicking his feet up on the coffee table Stefan prepared himself to get lost in the world of shiny suits, mullets, and gold chain wearing undercover detectives.

Time lapsed and Stefan felt himself being jarred awake by the sound of his cell phone vibrating against the end table. Lifting his head, he grimaced when he noticed he had been sleeping in a pool of his own drool. Clearing his throat, he picked up his phone, examining it with one eye.

It was Caroline.

"Hello?" he coughed to clear his throat.

"Hey, can you get down to the hospital?"

Stefan rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "Hospital? What's going on?"

"Bonnie had some type of allergic reaction to something she ate. She's being held for observation but I have a test that I seriously need to pass otherwise I'll be…"

"Caroline," Stefan interrupted her diatribe knowing she would sprout off the Presidents of the United States if you let her. Once she got going it was almost impossible to get her lips to stop flapping.

"Sorry," she muttered sheepishly.

Sitting upright, Stefan got to his feet. "Bonnie is in the hospital?"

"Yes, can you come and sit with her? Her dad is out of town, again."

It wasn't hard hearing the exasperation in Caroline's voice at the mention of Bonnie's absentee father.

Already making his way to his bedroom, Stefan wedged his phone between his shoulder and cheek. "Yeah, I'll be there in about twenty minutes. What room is she in?"

"401-B. Thank you so much, Stefan."

"Let her know I'm on the way."

"Will do. See you when you get here."

Clicking off the phone, Stefan took the world's fastest shower, brushed his teeth, decided to let his hair air dry instead of spending the requisite thirty to style it, donned his usual uniform of jeans, fitted shirt, and shrugged on his trusty leather jacket.

Just as he made it back downstairs, keys in hand, his phone started vibrating again. He saw it was Damon calling him.

Stefan's leaf green eyes rolled as he debated for a good minute on whether or not to answer. Old habits died hard and he answered the phone.

"What?" he barked, closing the front door and quickly striding over to his Porsche.

"Good morning to you, too sunshine. I was just calling to remind you to pick up your vervain ration for the month. Don't want to be caught unawares."

"Whatever," Stefan mumbled gruffly and hung up the phone. Climbing behind the wheel, he gunned the engine and was off to Mystic Falls Hospital Center.

Stefan only drove ten miles over the posted speed limit but it still felt as if it had taken him a lifetime to reach the hospital. He bypassed the triage area, smiled at the lone nurse sitting behind the desk on the floor where Bonnie's room was.

He tapped on the door with the back of his knuckle and then pushed the object opened.

Caroline's voice was the first he heard followed by Bonnie's sultry timbre. At the last second Stefan cursed the fact he didn't stop at the gift shop to get her a bear or flowers. He could do so later he told himself as he rounded the curtain and came face-to-face with Bonnie.

Her viridian eyes lit up once she saw him, and then self-consciously she tried to tame her wild mane of chocolate curls.

"Look who's here," Caroline said unnecessarily, wearing a ridiculously huge smile on her face. She patted Bonnie on the leg before collecting her bag. "Well, I'm off to school. I'll make sure to let all your teachers know you're in the hospital and see if they'll give me your assignments and whatnot."

"Thanks, Caroline," Bonnie spoke but with some difficulty.

Stefan had kept his gaze locked on Bonnie but more specifically her swollen cheeks that had he not known her condition he would have assumed she had been in a fight. Her neck was bloated as well, but Bonnie didn't appear to be in any pain.

On her way out, Caroline gave Stefan a heavy look before wiggling her fingers in a wave. She shut the door after her departure.

Bonnie waved her hand towards the vacant chair. "You can sit."

"You don't have to talk if it's uncomfortable," Stefan advised and then took up the chair that was posted next to the bed. He reached for Bonnie's hand.

"I look a mess," Bonnie dropped her eyes to her lap hating the fact she could only speak a few words at a time. The swelling of her tongue was receding but not fast enough.

Stefan shook his head. Sure she looked a little puffy and inflated but he had seen people in far worse condition.

"You look beautiful like you do everyday."

If her skin wasn't already splotchy it would have colored over because his compliment made her blush. Bonnie scratched her arm.

They were quiet for a while. Stefan figured it was difficult for her to talk and he had nothing but questions she wouldn't be able to answer. He stared up at the small television hanging from the ceiling. The morning news was playing.

"Do you want to watch something else?" he asked.

Bonnie shrugged. Caroline, during her visit had pretty much dominated the conversation and hogged the television which Bonnie didn't mind. She hated hospitals and wondered why she was being kept for observation. Sure, she hadn't experienced an allergic reaction since she was ten years old, but Bonnie was positive all she needed was a histamine shot and she would be good as new.

But it was nice of Stefan to come and sit with her. They hadn't seen or really spoken to one another since she showed up at his place, broken into his kitchen, and cooked dinner. They had agreed to give one another space to deal with their issues. In her attempt to do so, Bonnie decided to be adventurous and try a new seafood restaurant that opened up in a town located some fifteen miles outside of Mystic Falls.

Lesson learned: scallops were her new natural enemy.

Stefan flipped through the scarce channels. If you wanted to watch something other than the local stations you had to pay a five dollar surcharge. Hospitals…always looking for some way to make a buck, Stefan thought and then settled with some talk show notorious for its paternity and lie detector tests.

Bonnie coughed and Stefan immediately had his attention on her. "Do you need some water?"

Bonnie nodded.

Stefan quickly filled a little plastic cup with ice cold water and held it out to Bonnie. She smiled nervously up at him and wondered if she could control the muscles in her face in order to wrap her lips around the straw. Finally she managed and swallowed the water.

Stefan hated to see her struggle and then an idea came to him, one he was wondering why Caroline didn't come up with unless she had and Bonnie refused.

"I can give you some of my blood to speed up your recovery," Stefan offered quietly.

Bonnie blinked at him. His suggestion made her think of the one and only time she purposely consumed his blood. It had been after Damon viciously bit into her because Emily through her had destroyed the crystal. It was a painful memory that Bonnie didn't like revisiting, but she had been so mortally afraid yet also grateful that Stefan had saved her life.

Her eyes lowered to her hands. As much as vampire blood provided a quick fix-it solution to most physical problems, Bonnie wanted to combat this the old fashioned way. Besides with their luck in blood sharing something might short circuit in the room, electrocute her and she'd be done for and then transitioning.

"No, thank you."

"Are you sure? I'll stay with you the whole twenty-four hours to make sure nothing happens to you."

Bonnie hesitated before shaking her head.

Stefan nodded, and then retook his seat.

For the rest of the afternoon, if Bonnie wasn't being poked and prodded by her doctor, or sleeping, then they played tic-tac-toe, or cards. In the evening, Stefan took Bonnie on a stroll around the hospital. It felt oddly domestic. They found themselves standing outside of the nursery admiring the new additions to the world.

"Wish I could go back," Bonnie muttered.

"Me, too. I would have done so many things differently."

Bonnie stared up at his profile. "Like what?"

"I wouldn't have fallen under Katherine Pierce's charm for starters. But that's all water under the bridge now."

"If you hadn't…" Bonnie looked around to make sure no one was loitering around, "then you and I wouldn't have met."

Stefan stared down at her heart shaped face and those eyes that sometimes saw too much, looked too deep, and saw the heart he tried to shield from the world but failed every time. If he never became a vampire he wouldn't have met her. He never would have fallen in love with Elena. Stefan imagined he would have married young to some beautiful girl from a prominent family, had children, gone into the family business, and died before he was sixty years old.

That life was so far off course from the one he was presently living he could say he was slightly glad it hadn't gone that route.

Yet standing here with Bonnie watching new life while thinking of his old one felt surreal.

However, the image Bonnie had built up in her mind about him was a lie. It only told a portion of the story. She didn't know about the days where he happily ripped his victims to shreds, or compelled married men to drink the blood of their wives before finishing them off. She didn't know about that hidden wall in his old apartment in Chicago that was littered with the names of his victims. She didn't know of the monster she held company with each and every single day that continuously scratched at the surface begging to be freed.

Bonnie watched as sadness clouded Stefan's eyes. "What's wrong?"

He snapped out of it and placed a smile on his face. "Nothing. Just thinking about the past. We should get back to your room before your doctor thinks I staged a jail break."

Stefan walked off, but Bonnie grabbed him by the arm detaining him. "What's wrong?"

"Not here. It can wait until you're better."

"Promise?"

Stefan nodded.

"Say it out loud."

Sighing, Stefan said, "Promise."

Bonnie flashed him a smile and then led the way back to her room.

Caroline showed up at five to take over bearing Bonnie's class work and food.

"I don't think she can eat any of this," Stefan muttered as he stared at the take out boxes that contained some of Bonnie's favorite foods.

Bonnie snorted and greedily reached for the bacon cheeseburger with all the trimmings. Stefan yanked it out of her hands. She pouted.

"You are such a party pooper," Caroline glared at him. "She has to eat something."

"Maybe you should ask her doctor what's appropriate for her to eat. Did you get soup?"

"Soup?" Caroline and Bonnie grimaced in unison.

Stefan shook his head.

Bonnie moodily sipped on the tasteless vegetable soup from the hospital cafeteria while Stefan and Caroline stuffed their faces with burgers, fries, while washing it down with thick chocolate milkshakes. They certainly didn't help matters by moaning and licking their fingers clean.

"This is for your own good, Bonnie," Caroline had mumbled between bites.

Bonnie wanted to cry.

After dinner was over, Caroline pulled out her laptop and the three settled in to watch movies she downloaded from Netflix.

At ten visitation hours were officially over.

"I'm going to stay with her," Caroline said while stretching the kinks out of her back. "I spoke with her doctor and if all looks good she'll be released some time tomorrow."

"I know that will make her happy. Call me if anything changes," Stefan said.

Bonnie stepped out of the bathroom and noticed that Stefan had shrugged his coat on.

"You're leaving?"

He nodded. "Yeah, but Care is going to stay with you. I told her to call me if anything changes. Good news, you might be released tomorrow."

Bonnie attempted to smile. She had had such a nice and pleasant day with Stefan that she didn't want him to leave, but again it was best they kept some space between them.

He pulled her in for a quick hug locking into memory her smell. She always smelled like fresh flowers no matter the time of day. He gently pinched her chin.

"I'll see you later."

"Okay."

Caroline had been watching their exchange while pretending to text on her phone.

"See you, Caroline."

"Bye, Stefan."

Once the two old friends were alone, Caroline dropped all pretenses of texting. She watched as Bonnie climbed back into bed.

"He is so crushing on you."

"Caroline," Bonnie whined.

"What? I'm only stating the obvious. He stayed with you all day. He didn't have to do that."

"He knew if he left you would be on him like white on rice."

"Well, there is that," Caroline laughed.

* * *

Two days after being released from the hospital, Bonnie trekked her way to Stefan's humble abode on the outskirts of town. Parking her car in the driveway, and walking up to the front door, instead of barreling her way in like she normally would, she utilized the doorbell.

Fifteen seconds later the door opened, and Bonnie's mouth went dry.

She saw nothing but naked, sinewy skin and rippling muscles covered with droplets of water. In that moment Bonnie forgot her name, address, the purpose for her visit, and her date of birth. She could comprehend nothing but the fact that Stefan, little modest Stefan Salvatore, stood before her shirtless and wet.

Then something thrilling began to happen. The heat from his body coupled with the cold air rushing in, steam began to rise from his shoulders and arms.

Bonnie frowned. Was she inadvertently setting him on fire? Was she staring at him _that _hard?

It vaguely occurred to Stefan that he was standing in front of a lady half naked. He had his wife beater in his hand but he was suffering from a mild case of paralysis for some reason. He had just gotten his jeans on after his shower when the doorbell rang not leaving him much time to slap his shirt on.

He cleared his throat. "Hey."

Bonnie blinked rapidly and then proceeded to look at everything but Stefan. He really shouldn't walk around like that. He could cause someone with a heart condition to go into cardiac arrest. Inwardly, Bonnie shook her head. She knew Stefan wasn't perfect, came with a buttload of issues, but for Elena to let all of _that_ slip through her porcelain fingers, girl was an idiot.

"Umm, hi," Bonnie mumbled still not able to look Stefan in the eye.

"This is a nice surprise. You're looking well."

And she was, the swelling to her cheeks and neck were completely diminished and her caramel skin glowed. The bright luster to her eyes had returned as well. In short, Bonnie was dazzling.

Bonnie scratched the space behind her ear. "Yeah, I feel better." Pause. "Seriously, dude are you going to put on your shirt or what?"

Taking up a casual lean against the door, Stefan grinned. "Does my nakedness offend you?"

Forcing herself to look at him, Bonnie was proud of the fact her eyes didn't lower below his clavicle. "It doesn't but I know how shy you can be sometimes. I'm just looking out for you."

"Well if you insist." Stefan shrugged his shirt on and Bonnie's eyes stretched as his abdominals did when he lifted his arms above his head. You could grate cheese on his abs.

Flushing, Bonnie entered the premises and kept her back to Stefan.

"Excuse the mess," he said and walked around her and began to pick up several dirty dishes that littered the table. "The maid hasn't stopped by yet."

"You have a maid?" Bonnie asked almost incredulously.

Stefan pursed his lips and slighted her with a look. "Where is your sense of humor today?"

"Oh, that was a joke," Bonnie snorted and felt dumb.

Stefan chuckled and placed the dishes in the kitchen sink and came back into the living room. He noticed that Bonnie hadn't moved a muscle. Well, considering the last time she was here the two of them had had a very serious discussion about feelings and issues the both of them needed to deal with and get over. Stefan could admit that he hadn't made a lick of progress on his end, and he wondered how Bonnie was fairing.

"Make yourself comfortable unless this isn't a social visit," Stefan sat down in one of the wingback chairs facing the fireplace.

Bonnie sat across from him suddenly unsure and reticent. She hated feeling like this and hated the fact that things between herself and Stefan were changing where she couldn't handle being alone with him. She didn't want to question what this all really meant or was adding up to. But if she had to take a guess, Bonnie would say that she was slightly crushing on Stefan.

That's not what she wanted. At least not now when other pieces of her life were returning to normal, and she could almost trick herself into believing she was an ordinary eighteen year old girl trying to graduate high school on time.

But her traitorous mind wouldn't stop thinking about Stefan. He bombarded her thoughts almost on a consistent basis, and now seeing what he looked like without a shirt, her budding infatuation with him would only expand and increase.

Why couldn't vampires be hideous monsters like that thing from the movie _Nosferatu_ or better yet _Priest_? Disgusting and slimy bald-headed creatures with two teeth? Why did one of their attributes have to be lethal, heart exploding, panty decimating handsomeness?

Her drawn out silence caused Stefan to lean over and rub the back of her arm. Warmth spread through them both and their eyes drew together like magnets.

Bonnie cleared her throat. "I umm…I wanted to thank you for sitting with me in the hospital. You didn't have to do that."

"You're my bud, of course I did."

Hmm, Bonnie thought. They were buds. Nothing more and nothing less so why was her arm tingling?

Even to Stefan's ears what he said sounded hollow. As each day passed and he spent more and more time with Bonnie and saw other facets of her personality he found himself being drawn to her. It was almost inevitable by this point to want to learn all he could, study her quirks, discover her mannerisms, and dissect her psyche.

In the past Stefan had called Bonnie his friend because she was the best friend of the girl he was dating. It never went any deeper than that, and he and Bonnie weren't particularly inclined to get to know each other better. But now that the excuse of being friendly simply because Elena had been in the middle was gone, Stefan was finding out that calling someone a friend, and actually being a friend were different things.

He liked that Bonnie confided in him, opened herself up, and that she turned to him when she was going through something. He didn't tirelessly worry about her safety and that was refreshing within itself. Bonnie was exceptionally strong for a girl so young, and Stefan found that very attractive.

However, he couldn't help but feel that a part of him was being deceptive. His dreams were still plagued with his guilt over what happened with Klaus, the coffins, Abby. He would have to tell her the full truth one day.

"Actually the reason I came over was to ask if you wanted to go with me, Caroline, and Matt on a college tour."

"Oh," Stefan's voice went up an octave. "Which college?"

"Whitmore. It's where my Grams taught. You don't have to if you don't want to."

"I'd love to go."

"Oh," now it was Bonnie's voice that went up an octave. She slapped her hands on her thighs. "Okay, cool. It's this Friday. We're all meeting up at my house and shipping out no later than seven. The official tour begins at ten."

"I could stay the night, if you want since I live farther out now."

Bonnie's heart pounded at the implication and she was pretty sure Stefan could hear it. "You don't have to. Sure, that'll be fine," she quickly amended and smiled. "We're all staying on campus. The college has a hotel where they put up graduate students. It's really nice. It's a two-day tour, I forgot to mention."

"That's fine. Anything else you want to tell me?"

Bonnie shook her head. "That's everything."

They were quiet for a while. "I don't have anything else to do today so if you want to sit around, chill and relax you can," Stefan shrugged.

Bonnie took off her coat and kicked off her shoes. "Yeah, we still have a Scandal marathon to catch up on."

"We can watch it up in my room," Stefan suggested and then made a beeline for the fridge to collect some of Bonnie's favorite snacks.

Gulping a little nervously, Bonnie showed herself to his bedroom and sauntered up to his massive, imposing bed.

Bonnie snapped at herself in trying to make a big deal about this. They shared a bed once before and nothing happened. They even kissed. So sitting in bed next to each other, gorging on foods saturated in fat, and watching a deviously delicious, yet inappropriate love affair between a married president and ex-lawyer who fixed wide scale problems shouldn't make her nervous.

But it did. In the world Bonnie ventured to inside her mind some days it was the kind of thing she wanted to do with someone she was in a relationship with. And as time went on, Bonnie missed those days of curling up and cuddling on the couch, or going out to dinner and a movie with someone who didn't share the same body parts as her.

She knew hanging around Stefan would end up being hazardous to her health in more ways than one.

Her thoughts were interrupted when Stefan came into the room, arms full of junk food. Bonnie relieved him of the chips and Boston Crème Cakes, and then climbed up on the bed crawling her way to the middle. Stefan joined her, then maneuvered his way through his DVR recordings, and hit the play button once he spotted Scandal.

"How many times have you seen these episodes?" he asked and ripped open the chips.

"Enough that I almost have everyone's lines memorized. This is good television with an interesting plot that actually makes sense."

"You're picky about what you watch aren't you?" he smirked.

"Yes, I am. I don't like to watch shows where it's obvious the writers and producers are only catering to a handful of characters in their ensemble cast to please a certain fanbase. I swear most shows are only driven by ships not by logic and common sense."

"Maybe," Stefan hedged and licked the salt off his thumb, which naturally drew Bonnie's gaze, "you should go into writing, directing, and producing movies and shows, make things more fair and equal."

"Maybe," Bonnie responded quietly and then gave Olivia and Fitz her undivided attention.

* * *

**Whitmore College**

"Whitmore College was established in 1796 by brothers John and David Whitmore after both had been rejected by William & Mary in 1794 for their semi-heretical views on human anatomy and physiology. The brothers had been labeled as grave robbers and occultists since they believed that human innovation was not always inspired by God, but other unknown forces in the universe. Naturally they believed and studied alchemy and other sciences that were basically laughed at by their peers and superiors. Yet they founded this college for anyone who dared to think outside of the box."

Bonnie, Stefan, Caroline, and Matt listened as their tour guide, Adam, gave everyone a rundown of the history of the school, and tried not to look bored or disinterested. Bonnie especially was paying close attention because this was the university where Grams taught, and when Sheila had been alive, Bonnie never really asked questions about her profession or the school itself. Back then she really didn't care. But now after all she's experienced, after the things she's done, she wanted to learn all she could. And being here, she felt closer to Grams than she ever had before.

She had plans to visit her office later.

Bonnie knew her grandmother wasn't a random woman. She had chosen to study and teach here for a reason, and after hearing the brief synopsis of how Whitmore came into existence, the pieces were falling into place. This was a school for those whose ideals were shunned by those in the mainstream world, or went against tradition.

Bonnie glanced around at the stone buildings that outlined the quad, all of them the original buildings from the 1700's.

The small group of Whitmore potentials stood in the center of the quad and Bonnie counted five buildings forming a circle around their present location. It didn't take a genius for her to figure out that she was standing in the center of a pentagram.

That should have scared her, but it didn't.

Stefan peered down at Bonnie as he caught her wandering eye out of his peripheral vision. He softly brushed the back of her hand with his knuckle, effectively drawing her attention to him.

He leaned down and whispered, "Pay attention."

Hunter green eyes rolled but Bonnie tossed Stefan a smile before directing her attention back to the tour guide.

Caroline, with her arms folded across her chest, scratched her side and wondered when could they move on to the really fun stuff and get the total college experience, like the parties that were being thrown on fraternity row tonight. From the moment they stepped foot on campus a flyer was thrust into her hands advertising a costume party being held at some fraternity house. Things were looking up despite the fact Caroline had no interest in attending Whitmore. It was too close to Mystic Falls and only offered a handful of majors none of which Caroline wanted to study. She was only here for support.

"Now, if you'll follow me. There are approximately seven dorms on campus. Three of them are co-ed, and sorry possible incoming freshman you'll have to wait until your junior year before moving into one."

There were some grumbles from the attendees.

The group moved across the sizeable campus, staring at the facilities that were pointed out. They were shown the student union building, administration where the tour guide joked that a freshman would be spending his or her first three days battling it out with financial aid counselors, academic advisors, and the registrars office.

They were shown the all boy dorms which on the outside looked as welcoming as a maximum security prison; and the two all female dorms that at least had planted rose bushes and two stone benches out front to make it more appealing.

"This place is making me depressed," Caroline grumbled.

"And why is that?" Matt asked as he looked over a brochure from the athletic department. He hadn't settled on a college and figured he would be taking classes at Mystic Falls Community College because they were semi-affordable, and he could live at home.

"We've been here for an hour and I haven't seen one cute co-ed, or football stud, or even a hot chemist. This place blows."

"It's only eleven o'clock in the morning, Care," Bonnie said. "I'm sure they're either in class or still in bed."

That brightened Caroline a little bit, plus it was Friday and who got out of bed before noon on a Friday?

"Why are you looking for cute co-ed's anyways? Aren't you still with Tyler?" Matt inquired.

"Technically yes, but for all intents and purposes, no. Klaus can't find out the truth that Tyler is off breaking his sire bond."

Stefan trailed the group and tried to ignore that little pin prick sensation that crawled down his spine when something dangerous was nearby. Often he was the most dangerous thing lurking around, but there was something different about this atmosphere that just didn't seem right. Maybe it was the history lesson they received about the college, or maybe he was just letting his own fears and insecurities about the future cloud his judgment and make him feel things that weren't necessarily there. In any case, he covertly looked around keeping his senses open.

"Hey," a young girl who looked no older than sixteen drew everyone's attention. "Sorry to interrupt, but you skipped a building."

Adam stopped and looked to where the young student was pointing. Stefan noticed that the guy turned ashen a little yet tried to slap a beguiling smile on his face.

Everyone directed their attention to the fenced in building that looked as if it should be condemned and demolished. To Stefan it looked like a house you would see in a suburb. It was a red brick French provincial with steeple roofs. Several windows were busted out or missing completely, a few were boarded up, and the smell of smoke and ash, which the humans wouldn't be able to detect but he could, still permeated the air.

"Oh, that's the old infirmary. It caught fire about a year ago."

"So why hasn't it been renovated or torn down?" one parent asked. "It's an eye sore."

Adam scratched the back of his sandy blond head. "Yeah, this building isn't actually owned by the school. It's own by the McCullough family. It's really a complicated story," he fumbled nervously.

"I want to know what happened."

A chorus of "yeah" went up in the air. The tour guide caved in.

"A woman by the name of Hazel McCullough had this house built back in 1911 for her husband who was a renowned physicist. The lab in the science building didn't exactly meet their standards, and her husband was a deeply private researcher and lecturer, so she paid to have this place built so he could work on his experiments unsupervised. Well, something happened and the physicist, Henrik McCullough was killed right here in this building. So the administration closed it off, but then they reopened it in 1940 and turned it into an infirmary."

"Oh, my God is this place haunted?"

Several people began whispering at once.

Bonnie looked at Caroline who looked at Stefan, who had his eyes on Bonnie, as Matt kept his gaze locked on the building.

"No," Adam went on to say to quell fears. "There haven't been any sightings of ghosts or paranormal activity, which would be welcomed here anyways since several classes are taught on those subjects. Since this building is owned by the McCullough family someone has always paid for its upkeep and maintenance. The college has been in a legal battle with the executor of the estate to either have it repaired or ripped down. Until an agreement is settled, nothing can be done."

"Well that sucks," someone remarked.

"Today is actually the hundred year anniversary of Professor Henrik McCullough's death. Every year a small memorial is held for him. That takes place up on Paradise Hill, our next stop on the tour."

Everyone followed the tour guide yet Bonnie and her group lagged behind as they stared at the remnants of the building. None of them had a good feeling about it.

* * *

Caroline dropped her weight on the full sized bed in the graduate hotel as she hiked her right leg over her left knee to untie her boots. "My legs are killing me."

"You shouldn't even be tired," Bonnie remarked as she dug through her duffel bag looking for her makeup case.

"Why, because I'm a vampire? Pfft. Listening to all of that droning and coupled with the walking, and then our impromptu trip to shop for costumes for the frat party, I think I'm entitled to feeling a little pooped. What are you about to do?"

"I'm about to head over to my Grams' old office. Maybe find someone who knew her, asks a few questions."

"Do you want me to come with you?"

Bonnie shook her head. "No you stay and get your rest. We have a frat party to attend tonight, remember?"

Caroline showed all of her teeth as she slipped out of her denim jacket and then pulled back the duvet on the bed. She climbed under the covers but then brought her knees up to her chest and watched as Bonnie freshened up her makeup.

"So what's going on with you and Stefan?"

"Nothing."

"Yeah, that's my point. It's been two months since he's been emancipated from Elena's golden vagina. What's the hold up?"

Bonnie laughed and swiped her lip gloss applicator brush over her bottom lip. "I'll pay you a hundred bucks to say that to her face."

"I'll do it for free," Caroline waved a dismissive hand in the air. "Really, why haven't you jumped his bones yet?"

Turning away from the mirror, Bonnie slightly glared at Caroline. "Maybe because it's only been two months since he's been liberated from the golden vagina as you so eloquently put it. Come on, Caroline, I'm not the type of girl to go after her friend's sloppy seconds."

"One, Stefan isn't anyone's sloppy seconds. If anything Damon got his. And two, you know you like him. Like him more than just a friend. I get that you want to give him time to lick his wounds and get his shit together because no one wants to be the rebound person, but at the same time it doesn't mean that everything between you two has to remain platonic."

"No," Bonnie refuted. "That's exactly what it means. I've been down this road before with Jeremy. He never got over Anna. She died. End of story until lo and behold he could see her ghost and fell in love with her dead ass all over again. I'm not…I don't want to put myself in another position to get burned, Care. No matter how much I may like someone as a friend or _more_ especially when there's still a possibility that person might get back with his ex. I just can't go there."

Caroline wanted to ask on what planet would Stefan ever conceive of getting back together with Elena after she's been sullied by his brother, but stranger things have been known to happen, especially in their hometown.

Bonnie slipped her waist length leather bomber jacket on and smiled at her. "How do I look?"

"Maternal," Caroline deadpanned.

Ignoring her comment with a roll of her eyes, Bonnie grabbed her purse from the bed and the spare room key. "I'll be back in a little bit."

Caroline yawned. "Be safe."

SBSBSB

Across campus Stefan came out of the bathroom and found Matt occupying the other full sized bed, flipping through channels. Stefan really had no idea what the hell he was doing on a college campus. Was he actually going to put himself through four years of college, attempt to find a job, and do what? Try to achieve the American Dream?

This wasn't his world, and this wasn't his life. He's had enough education, sat through enough lectures, read enough books a hundred times over to officially be done playing the seventeen year old student. He didn't want to know why he was torturing himself in this light when he could be jet setting across the globe, drinking fine wine and booze, hitting up the hottest social clubs, and seducing the most beautiful women in the world.

Yeah, sounded like a fine alternative only problem was, that wasn't him.

His thrill seeking days had ended the minute he decided to make Mystic Falls his home again. His nephew Zach had been right. He never should have returned because he didn't belong.

Stefan sat down on the edge of his bed.

Matt shifted his attention from the images on the screen to look at the immortal. Stefan had been quieter than usual, which wouldn't have been an odd thing considering he normally spoke when he had something to say. Between him and his brother, on the surface Stefan was the lesser of the two evils, but that didn't make Matt trust him.

However, he recognized the signs of a burning man because he had been in Stefan's shoes too many times to remember.

"Everything okay with you, Stefan? You seem a little," Matt made a restless motion with his shoulders. "Distracted."

Stefan actually jumped a little at Matt's voice. "I'm good," he replied almost automatically.

"And I'm Tinkerbell. We're not close or anything, but you can talk to me. Is it about Elena?"

Stefan pursed his lips instantly feeling annoyed. "No."

Matt smiled a little. When was something not about Elena? He might not have much in common with Stefan, but there was one thing they shared: having to stand on the sidelines and watch that girl fall for someone else.

"Bonnie, then?" Matt guessed.

Stefan's eyes narrowed a bit, but he didn't comment.

This naturally spurred Matt on. "What's going on with you two?"

"Nothing. We're just friends."

"Yeah, I noticed that you two have been spending an awful lot of time together."

"That's what friends do."

Matt looked thoughtful for a moment. "And I also noticed that you can't go two minutes without looking at her."

A slightly guilty and bashful expression passed over Stefan's face. He lowered his eyes to the carpeted floor.

"Bonnie is one of my close friends," Matt continued. "She's like a little sister to me. If you like her, I just hope you're completely over Elena before you try anything. If not, well I might not be supernatural but I'm an excellent shot."

Stefan lifted his head at the implied threat. Reluctantly, he gave Matt a brownie point. "Noted," he replied.

"Good talk," Matt said and returned his attention back to the TV. He sat the remote down once he found the ESPN channel.

* * *

Bonnie stared at the placard on the building. Comparative Religions and Sciences Institute it read. Already Bonnie was wondering if she'd feel her Grams' presence the moment she stepped inside. Was she truly ready to face a part of her grandmother's life that she often took for granted? Goose bumps pebbled along her skin, and Bonnie took a deep breath.

Pulling open one of the double doors, the place wasn't as eerily silent as Bonnie anticipated it being. She could hear several people talking either on the phone or with colleagues, some laughing, some being downright belligerent. Knowing she wasn't completely alone made the tension coiling in her neck and lower back lessen but not by much. She quickly found the elevator and took it to the third floor.

It was a lot quieter up here.

As she walked down the hall, surreptitiously peeping into offices, she noticed that a few were opulently decorated. She had spoken with the dean and he told her that Sheila's office was the last door on the right on the third floor. Bonnie wasn't sure what to expect, yet she raised her fist to knock when the door burst open.

She jumped back slightly, her heart beating wildly in her ribcage.

A pair of surprised chocolate eyes took in Bonnie's sudden arrival. "Hello."

"Hi," Bonnie and the unknown woman who reminded her of British actress Naomie Harris spoke at the same time.

"Can I help you?" the woman asked.

"Ah, yeah, yes," Bonnie stammered, feeling her cheeks warm with embarrassment. "This used to be Sheila Bennett's office, right?"

"Yes, it was," the woman replied and then waited for Bonnie to get on with it.

"Oh, I'm her granddaughter, Bonnie Bennett. I'm here on a college tour and I just wanted to take a look at where my Grams used to work."

The suspicious gleam that had been in the unidentified woman's eyes vanished and was replaced with genuine warmth. She stepped aside.

"Please, come in. Apologies," she extended her hand towards Bonnie who shook it. "I'm Professor Zora Langston. I teach anthropology and International Studies and I used to be a student of your grandmother's."

"Really?" Bonnie's eyes widened.

"Yes," Zora replied and then walked back to her desk and held out a hand welcoming Bonnie to take one of the two chairs that sat opposite of it.

Bonnie's eyes darted around. The office was decorated with an eclectic mix of African, French, and Australian art from what Bonnie could tell. The scent of cinnamon was heavy in the air. She sat down and kept her smile in place as she faced Professor Langston.

"I was so sorry to hear about Professor Bennett's passing. She was my inspiration. She was actually my mentor when I was working on my thesis. She was quite the radical thinker. Are you considering Whitmore as your alma mater?"

Bonnie nodded and pinched her lips. "I'm slowly making my way on the college circuit, but I wanted this to be my first stop. When my Grams taught here I never really asked her questions, or visited this place much."

Zora placed her elbows on her desk and made a steeple of her hands. "Well this school has one of the best International Studies curriculums in the south. Many of the students who major in the IS program go off to work for NATO, the UN, Homeland Security if that's what you have an interest in."

"What about the occult?"

Zora sat back, her shrewd chocolate eyes assessing Bonnie in a new light. She had heard the rumors, had even sat in on a lecture or two of Sheila Bennett's about the occult, Salem witches, and ancient druids. She had never really put any stock into it, but Zora wasn't one to discount anything.

"It's not really a major of study, but the college does offer some courses. Do you have an interest in it?"

"Maybe," Bonnie shifted in her seat. "You said my Grams helped you with your thesis?"

"She did," Zora said and cleared her throat. "Sheila Bennett might have been a petite woman but she carried a persona the size of the Empire State building. She really was insightful. She pushed me until I nearly wanted to snap," she smiled fondly. "We got into plenty of heated arguments mostly because I was too full of myself and thought I knew everything like most graduate students have a tendency to do. But Sheila, she liked reading me my rights," both Zora and Bonnie laughed. "And when she spoke, you listened, because nine times out of ten she was right. But I'm sure you already know that. So, what is it that you really want to know about your grandmother? Special projects she might have been working on?"

"Anything."

"Then I should get us some coffee."

For the next hour, Professor Langston shared stories with Bonnie about the rallies Sheila led on campus for the equality of women in tenured positions, and also student representation. Bonnie found herself being transported to a world where she wasn't sure she'd have a tenth of the guts her grandmother had. And though she battled evil in her own special way, there was a level of fearlessness Bonnie felt she had yet to achieve.

Zora Langston had also unearthed a box of Sheila's personal items.

"Some of her lectures are published in anthologies in the library if you want to take a look."

"Really? I had no idea that my Grams was so…accomplished."

"Teaching was her life," Zora looked at Bonnie thoughtfully. She certainly did see her old mentor in the young girl. With time, experience, and good leadership Zora knew Bonnie would be a force to be reckoned with one day. "I hate to cut this short, but I do have another appointment across campus."

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't mean to hold you up."

"No worries. It wasn't until now that I realized I really do miss her. If you decide to make Whitmore your home for the next four years, feel free to stop by my office. We can even do lunch. That is if you're not embarrassed to be seen with a teacher after class."

"I'd like that," Bonnie smiled.

"Here's my card," Zora said. "Let's keep in touch."

Bonnie accepted it and then grabbed the box of her Grams' effects. Zora showed her to the door.

"It was nice meeting you, Bonnie."

"Nice meeting you, too, Professor Langston. And thank you for taking the time to talk to me."

"Don't mention it."

* * *

Night had fallen and Stefan couldn't believe he was going to step out in public dressed as Captain Hook. Going to this costume party was a bad idea he wanted to complain, because when had anything good ever happened whenever they attended a social function? Someone always ended up being hospitalized or worse—dead. As much as he wanted to stay in and sulk, he didn't want to ruin everyone else's fun in experiencing their first taste of college life.

He could really hate being one hundred and sixty-two years old sometimes.

He and Matt stood outside and waited for the girls to come downstairs. Stefan wanted to question Matt if he felt as ridiculous as he looked dressed as Jack Sparrow.

"Don't you two look spiffy," Caroline said as she sauntered outside.

She and Bonnie were going as Satine, the high priced courtesan from Moulin Rouge. Where Caroline's corset was indigo, Bonnie's was vermilion.

Stefan could hardly look away the minute Bonnie stepped out of the hotel, wrapping her black feather boa around her shoulders.

"I don't see how it's fair that the two of you can go as the same person, but only one of us," Matt wagged his finger between himself and Stefan, "can go as Captain Hook."

"It's called a woman's prerogative, Matty," Caroline huffed and then grabbed his arm as she pointedly looked at Bonnie and jerked her head towards Stefan.

Bonnie cleared her throat and had to admit that tight black leather looked exceptionally good on Stefan. His leather doublet was open at the collar exposing some of his upper chest, and the pants, well they were snug in all the right places. And who knew having a hook for a hand could look good on anyone. He even went as far as to apply messy black liner to his eyes which made them more smoldering.

"You're stunning," Stefan stated matter-of-fact.

That was a jolt to Bonnie's system. She couldn't remember a time Stefan paid her a compliment about her looks.

"Thanks. So do you. You look very…nice," inwardly Bonnie cringed and wanted to face palm herself. She was usually a lot more descriptive than that. Damn, she really was rusty in the flirting department.

Major fail, Caroline thought to herself and wondered if now might be the time to invest in a thesaurus for Bonnie. Nice? The only time someone used that word was to avoid hurting someone's feelings. Yet as she carefully watched Stefan's expression he didn't seem to mind. Besides, his eyes were too busy ogling her best friend.

Stefan's eyes were riveted on Bonnie's entire package, but it was something about her legs that kept drawing his greedy attention. Stefan wouldn't label Bonnie as being a conservative dresser. She dressed according to the weather, but she wasn't one to show unnecessary skin. The corset paid homage to her breasts and cinched her tiny waist which only served to make her hips flare out giving her a definitive hourglass shape. He might end up calling her Cola for the rest of the night because she reminded him of a Coca Cola bottle.

"Red is definitely a good color on you," he complimented. _That's the best you could do? _He admonished himself.

Bonnie demurely lowered her eyes to her own attire, and tried not to feel naked or blush. The corset wasn't so bad since it pretty much covered up her mid-drift; it was the frilly skirt that was several inches way too short that she had a problem with. Her legs were encased in fishnet stockings, and ankle boots completed her look.

Caroline and Matt exchanged knowing glances. It was apparent Stefan and Bonnie were too busy engaging in the age old battle of eye-sex to take anything else into account.

"Are you guys coming, or do you need some time alone?" Matt chuckled.

That snapped Bonnie and Stefan out of their daze. They both glared at Matt before locking eyes once more.

Stefan extended his hand out to Bonnie. She tentatively accepted it only because this would be their first time holding hands in public. It had become a private ritual between them, and with her earlier talk with Caroline bouncing around in her head, Bonnie couldn't escape feeling as if she and Stefan were moving beyond the pretense of friendship.

Her fingers were warm against his tepid skin, almost searing as they headed on foot towards the line of buses that were waiting on the west end of campus to take expectant partygoers to fraternity row.

The buzzing energy of the crowd was all Caroline needed to get into party mode as she danced around with a group of already inebriated girls who were all dressed as Victoria Secret models—at least that's what Caroline thought they were going as being they were decked out in lingerie. Matt could do nothing but grin like a loon. He loved college!

Stefan and Bonnie managed to squeeze themselves in a corner and watched the mayhem on the bus unfold. Things only got progressively wilder as they made it to the venue.

Streams of people poured in and out of a two-story white Colonial with blue shutters, while an armada of cars cruised down the street, and people gathered on the lawn in large and small groups. Already Bonnie was dreading going inside not that she was claustrophobic or anything, but the idea of being crushed against strangers under the influence of drugs and alcohol was super unappealing.

Stefan held on tightly to her hand as they navigated their way inside.

Two minutes in and already her ass had been groped. Bonnie was ready to cut a bitch, but she tempered herself and looked up at Stefan who was doing an effective job of cleaving a path through the gyrating bodies.

Stefan leaned down to whisper in her ear, his lips accidentally brushing against the shell of her ear. "Do you want something to drink?" he asked.

Instead of responding orally, Bonnie nodded her head and stifled her shiver. Stefan quickly found the bar and picked up two red plastic cups. He sniffed them both, having familiarized himself with the undetectable scent of GHB a known date-rape drug. The beer he selected was on the up and up and handed a cup to Bonnie.

Beer wasn't Bonnie's drink of choice. She could handle a few shots of tequila, and preferred to nurse a beer whenever she was at a party because typically she was the designated driver.

Several girls tossed come hither and bedroom eyes at Stefan who merely ignored them and stood next to Bonnie like a Greek statue come to life.

The bass from the speakers nearly shattered her eardrums, but Bonnie bobbed in time with the music, and then swallowed a large quantity of beer. She took Stefan by the hand and tried to pull him in the thicket of the crowd.

"Dance with me," she said over the noise.

Stefan heard her perfectly fine, but pretended not to. He was not budging from holding up the wall.

Seeing that he was going to be difficult, Bonnie slid in front of him and gave him her best puppy dog eyes.

Stefan shook his head. "No."

She added a little pout.

"I mean it, Bonnie," he laughed succinctly. "I do not dance."

Upping the ante once more, Bonnie braced her hands on his shoulders to lift herself up on her toes. "Please," she breathed into his ear.

The lower half of his body wanted to oblige her that was for certain. Stefan stared up at the ceiling cursing his weakness. He finished off the beer in his cup and then tossed it somewhere. He took Bonnie's cup, drained hers as well, and then, taking her by the hips, he pushed her backwards into the crowd.

Bonnie smiled in victory. This was going to be a sweet night.

To be continued…

**A/N: Yes, I used 4x04 as inspiration for this. I, like many others, thought we would get awesome Bamon scenes and then we were delivered garbage. *sigh*. And I also wanted to show Stefonnie struggling with their attraction with one another and decided to up the awkwardness between them. I hope to update soon since this is fresh in my mind, but that totally depends on you guys. I'm doing my best not to let JP destroy my love for these characters. I never thought that I would be disappointed in Caroline because she's "perfect" *eye roll* but what she said about Chris the hybrid and trying to brush off his death like it was nothing, and disregard the fact that Tyler considered him a friend…I'm almost basically done with her. I was already a little irritated at the fact that Caroline would have one more guy added to her harem—Stefan—even if its in the form of friendship, but what she said to Tyler, basically sealed her coffin for me. So I'm trying to remain objective and true to the story I want to tell and flesh out everyone's characterization because with the way things are unfolding on the show, we won't have ANYTHING but fanfiction. Okay, loves, until next time. **


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hello to all of those who love Stefonnie. It didn't take me three months to update. Yea! Here is the latest enjoy.**

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

Everything was fine in theory. Once things stopped being a theory and became a reality that's when the shift started. Stefan Salvatore realized a long time ago he wasn't the same foolish, young man who was killed on a dirt road in Virginia while trying to help rescue the vampire his brother loved. He was no longer the murderous vampire who didn't kill out of necessity but because he rejoiced in ending human life in the most terrible way possible. He was no longer the same vampire who found love again close to two hundred years later with a girl who shared the face of the woman that started his downward spiral into hell.

He was different. Evolved. Yet still fundamentally the same—principle wise anyways. For so long he didn't live life on his own terms. He wore his regret, guilt, and shame like a cloak and right now, in this moment, in this era, he felt like he was shedding it like snake skin.

Stefan was close to being able to breathe.

Well, not necessarily considering a petite young woman stacked in all the right places with chocolate curls, sunny disposition depending on the day of the week, killer make up, and who smelled as sweet as a bakery was currently grinding on his man parts.

_You can do this, _Stefan tried to give himself a pep talk. He had danced lasciviously with women in the past. Caroused with them until they literally dropped dead, participated in his fair share of debauchery, but this was different because this was Bonnie. He held a certain level of respect for her that was beginning to crumble like sugar glass the more she continued to thrust her ass against his crotch.

To his relief Bonnie turned around to face him. She was completely lost in the music, the atmosphere, her own movement paying him very little attention, which was good considering Stefan couldn't get his face to act right nor his hands to obey him. He wanted to let go and enjoy this experience because he could scarcely recall the last time he had fun—genuine fun where he didn't have to put on for appearances sake. Bonnie made it easy to forget yet also remember that he was apart of the world, that he had some value, and that he shouldn't take himself or situations too seriously. He was the living dead. If anyone knew the definition of the phrase carpe diem, it was him.

Bonnie opened her eyes and looked at Stefan head on. He was concentrating perhaps too hard. She wiggled just a little closer to him and draped her arms on his shoulders and leaned up to whisper:

"Relax. No one is going to eat you."

Stefan let out a small laugh and graced her with a smirk that revealed nothing of his inner thoughts. He grabbed her by the hips and pulled her flush against him in a move that clearly surprised her by the shocked expression on her face. Her full bottom lip was on full display and Stefan couldn't tear his gaze from it. He made a promise that he would keep his mouth and certain other body parts away from Bonnie until such a time arrived that it was okay to give into the little fantasies that began constructing and building itself each time they hung out.

Yet she was making it difficult for him to remember exactly where the lines were drawn. They were friends as he told Matt. However, if Matt could see what was boiling right under the surface, Stefan began to wonder who else could, too. Aside from Caroline, but she had a nose for sniffing out this sort of thing.

Not like it was top secret that he and Bonnie had been spending an inordinate amount of time together. People saw them walking together at school. Could often find them playing pool at The Grill. However he was sure they were more interested in what they did behind closed doors when it was just the two of them.

Hate to disappoint people, but he and Bonnie's arrangement was more domestic than it was hedonistic.

Perhaps it was time to change it.

Holding her securely in the middle of her back, Stefan bent Bonnie backwards and dipped her in an arc. Her long hair swept the floor and when he brought her back to a standing position, the look on her face clearly said that she approved. Bonnie snaked down his body holding on to his legs for leverage before slowly made her way back up.

He gulped because dirty thoughts chased away the good in his head.

"I knew you weren't a stiff," she whispered in his ear.

She kept talking like that and she certainly would begin to feel something stiff poking her in the stomach.

"I'm many things, Bonnie, but stiff isn't one of them."

Slowly her painted lips transformed into a smile that could have incinerated his clothes clean off his body. His grip around her waist became a little tighter, a little more possessive, and Stefan wondered if Bonnie might make a grunt of complaint about being held so constrictively, but she didn't. To his astonishment she wiggled just a little closer until it was impossible to see where one began and the other ended. The pulse in her body matched that of the music and her marauding fingers borrowed into the hair on the nape of his neck sending tendrils of electricity through him.

The bluish-gray color of his eyes deepened until they appeared indigo in the dimly lit room. The noise and press of the crowd began to fade away as Stefan and Bonnie merely stood, not even consciously aware of the fact they weren't moving. They were taking up space, but it was space within each other. Something was shifting, alternating, recalibrating.

Bonnie's lips twitch. She couldn't lie and say she hadn't thought about kissing Stefan since the first time they did a little lip exploration with each other. Neither one of them had gone out of his or her way to address whether or not they dealt with the pink elephant in their lives. Bonnie wanted to believe that Stefan was making strides in getting over Elena. If she were in his shoes, she was sure it might take a few years to get over the fact her boyfriend would rather date her sister than her.

Vampires held on to things, felt things more intensely than humans. That being said, Stefan no longer appeared suicidal. He was no longer that burning man who couldn't function. He smiled now. And it was a smile that reached his eyes and was believable. He was open, at least with her. Everyone else he shunned and kept at arm's length. Bonnie got to see different sides to him. Sides that scared her, that thrilled her, that left her wanting more. Part of her felt she was being greedy. She wanted more. More from him. Just more! Stefan wasn't explicitly hers. They didn't hold a monopoly on one another. They were free to come and go as they chose, but…

When he looked at her like that it made her shiver. It made her feel alive and she hadn't felt alive in months. Her life had consisted of operating on autopilot. Someone else had always been in control of her schedule, her choices, her very existence it seemed. The invisible strings were gone—in a sense.

"I need more," she said and then realized she said that out loud.

Stefan blinked—curiously. He bent his head just a little until his cheek was pressed against hers. "You need more…what?"

Her eyes of their own volition closed. Was he interpreting her signal? Was he getting the message?

Bonnie pulled back a little so their eyes to could meet again. Those eyes, which in the past could pretty much talk her into doing anything where half-lidded and fringed with thick lashes and stared at her so intensely it made her nervous. Better yet it caused an explosion, a riot within her bones.

She couldn't answer his question because there was something she needed to take care of first.

Bonnie never relinquished the hold she had on the back of Stefan's neck. This played out to her advantage because with a small tug she brought his head down.

_Oh yeah, _Stefan thought and quickly wet his lips with his tongue just as the space separating their mouths was eaten up.

"Bonnie!"

"Fuck," Stefan cursed and put a modicum of space between him and Bonnie. He watched with dark eyes as a girl came tripping her way over to their current location.

The witch in question turned at the sound of the shrill voice that managed to be louder than the music blasting in the frat house.

Placing a smile on her face, Bonnie inwardly shook her head. Was the world seriously out to cock block her at every single turn?

Stacy Lewis a fellow senior at Mystic Falls High waved maniacally at Bonnie. Bonnie could tell she was inebriated and was barely managing to remain upright. For a second she hoped Stacy came with one of her friends because a drunk girl at a frat party spelled natural disaster and possible jail time.

Bonnie had to reach out and steady Stacy before she fell on the floor in her sky high stilettos. Before she even had the chance to open her mouth, Bonnie could already smell the tequila among other things on her breath. She slightly turned her head away from the foul odor.

"I'mmmmm soooo haaaapppyyy too seeeee youuuuu, Bonnniiiieeee," Stacy slurred her words together and then burst into a fit of giggles.

"Are you here with Ashley?" Bonnie asked. She knew Stacy and Ashley Williams ran in the same circle.

Stacy waved a manicured hand in the air dismissively. "That bissssshhhh is somewhere arrrroundddd hereeeee. Oh, heeeeyyyy Stefannnnn," Stacy attempted to wink flirtatiously at the brooding vampire but it came off as if she were having problems with her lazy eye.

It took a lot of effort on Stefan's end not to laugh in her face. "Sup," he merely said.

"Letttt mmeeee gooooo," Stacy laughed boisterously for no apparent reason, and then waved goodbye to Bonnie and Stefan.

"Stacy, be careful!" Bonnie called after the girl and was sure that her words of wisdom fell on deaf ears.

"Well I'm glad I'm not sharing a room with that one tonight. I predict the walls and floors will be painted with her vomit."

Bonnie grimaced and turned back around to face Stefan. "Thank you for putting that visual in my head."

He leered. "Now where were we? Right. You were making me do something against my will knowing how much I hate busting a move. I think I should report you to campus security."

Rolling her eyes good-naturedly Bonnie draped her arms over Stefan's shoulders once more. They began to move again, the interruption caused by Stacy Lewis leaving both of their minds within seconds as they were once again spinning that web.

Turning Bonnie around until her back connected to his chest, Stefan rested his chin on her naked shoulder. Things began to feel as if they were suspended in time as they danced. Bonnie rolled her hips, tossed her head to and fro oftentimes smacking Stefan in the face with her long hair, but he didn't mind. He ground his hips into hers as she threw hers back. His breath caught when she looked at him over her shoulder with a look that could have translated into a myriad of different things, but the message was clear:

_Want._

Too long now he had tip-toed around her that he was over it. Over playing it safe. Over being the "good" brother.

Stefan rested his chin on her shoulder again. When he exhaled, his breath tickled the space behind Bonnie's ear. She tilted her neck accommodating him and also in silent invitation.

Trapping her bottom lip between her top teeth, Bonnie ran her fingertips along his arms before linking her fingers with Stefan's. He had such large hands and thick fingers. He palmed her stomach with his left hand while the right held Bonnie securely around her waist. Her head fell back until it thudded against his shoulder.

He pressed one kiss against her neck, quickly followed by another. Starting with the space where shoulder and neck intersected he made his way upward, sliding out the tip of his tongue just to flick the corner of her jaw once he reached it. Soon Bonnie's neck and shoulder was assaulted with open mouth kisses that made the room spin, made her blood boil, and made the seat of her panties moist.

When Stefan pulled away, he confessed, "I've wanted to do that all night."

Talking was beginning to take some effort. "What else have you wanted to do?" Bonnie panted.

Stefan recognized the tremble in her voice. His left hand slid up until he cupped the underside of her breast. Bonnie's breath hitched. Being felt up in a room full of strangers was not on her bucket list but for tonight she could make this one exception. Bonnie had earned rather gained herself a reputation for being safe, non-threatening. She used to have a ton of girlfriends with boyfriends yet none of them had tried to keep her away because in their eyes she wasn't a threat. She was sweet, quirky, a little odd, almost child-like that girls basically wrote her off as being competition. They had nothing to fear because no one stopped long enough to do a double-take when she walked into a room.

Bonnie didn't want to be that girl anymore. She was more dangerous than anyone could ever imagine.

Her hands felt stiff and unsure. Bonnie didn't have a lot of experience in the seduction department. Logically she knew what she should do with her hands, but getting them to actually reciprocate was taking courage she didn't think she possessed. Things were rather uncomplicated when she and Jeremy were together. They shared kisses, but that was about it. There had been hand holding and long stares, but it never mounted to anything. The farthest she ever allowed him to go was cupping her through the barrier of her jeans and that was about it.

This was something else she was beginning to dislike about herself. Her own fear of her sexuality. If she could tempt a vampire then that meant the world clearly was her oyster. But she had the faintest idea on what to do with Stefan and still remain who she was at heart.

Bonnie had relied on Disney fairytales to teach her about love and relationships. No, she never fooled herself into thinking that she was a princess and all she had to do to attract a man was make friends with mice and birds, know how to spit shine some silverware, and be able to sing in tune on demand. She lived in the real world where girls like her didn't take home the quarterback of the football team, captain of the basketball team. She settled for emo guys who smoked pot on school grounds.

"You're thinking too much," Stefan's voice interrupted her reverie.

"I can't help it."

"I don't think I'm doing a very good job in keeping you distracted. I need to fix that."

"And what's your suggestion?"

He didn't answer merely grabbed her breast through the corset. There, that message should be plain enough.

Bonnie nearly jumped out of her skin. Other than her own hands, no one had touched her there before.

"Stefan," her cheeks were molten as she tried to escape. She could feel her nipple waking up from its long neglected slumber seeking out the warmth of his hand.

Bonnie's innocence next to her otherness was the first thing he picked up about her when they initially met. That seemed like ages ago, but in reality not more than a year had passed.

Her rapid breath inadvertently pressed her caramel mound deeper into his hand. Stefan squeezed it affectionately and wished he could touch her bare skin. He knew he was winding her up. That had been the whole point.

He was driving her crazy with lust. It flared out to all her limbs before settling deep in her womb, which felt unnaturally heavy. Bonnie admonished herself. She needed to get a hold of herself because technically this was second base.

"Am I embarrassing you?" he grinned and kissed the shell of her ear.

Bonnie turned her head so she could glare at him. "What do you think?"

"Do you want me to let you go?"

"No," she answered hastily and then regretted it. Being overly eager had been another thing she disliked about herself.

Stefan went back to his ministrations delivering hot kisses along her neck while he kneaded her breast and took things up a notch by circling his finger over her hardened nipple.

Bonnie's patience was wearing thin. She needed more than this. But she didn't want to appear to be easy. Of course Stefan probably figured out her secret of all secrets and wasn't trying to make light of that, but the two sides of her: nature and spirit were at war. Her spirit wanted to wait, nature not so much. It was demanding action and gratification that had been withheld for so long it was criminal.

She managed to turn around and face Stefan ready to plunder his mouth. He kissed her hard on the lips before tipping her chin to give him better access to her neck. He was fixated on it.

_Oh, my God he wants to bite me and I _want_ him too, _Bonnie thought as her right leg slid up his thigh before wrapping around his hamstring. Stefan bent forward while bending Bonnie backward, lips seemingly suctioned to her neck sure to leave a mark.

He could easily rip her corset into ribbons but Stefan needed total privacy for something like that. His lips made contact with the top of her creamy mound.

A breathy moan escaped Bonnie. She grabbed tuffs of his hair and smothered his face into her cleavage.

_Touch me, _Stefan wanted to say. He wanted to feel her tiny hands on any part of him, wait that was a lie, there were two distinct places Stefan wanted to be touched. The first being his hardened member in his breeches and the other…

Well it was a more intimate place than that.

He smelled her before she arrived and that made him growl low in his throat as he righted Bonnie once again. She stared up at him quizzically and wondered what was going on. It was in his eyes that Bonnie saw he was crawling back into his shell.

"It's Caroline," he told her apologetically.

Bonnie bit back a curse. She shifted until she stood shoulder-to-shoulder with Stefan.

Caroline pushed people out of her way left from right and beamed at the vampire/witch combo who looked ready to take her head off. She caught a little bit of their forbidden dance and would jump on Bonnie's ass the minute they were alone.

"Are we having fun?" Caroline shouted.

"We were," Stefan deadpanned and licked his lips. He could still taste Bonnie on his tongue.

Bonnie for her part tried to keep the annoyance and irritation off her face but was failing. "What is it?"

"Oh, nothing. I just need to borrow you for a minute. I'll bring her right back, Stefan." Taking her friend by the hand, Caroline dragged Bonnie behind her.

They walked through the maze of bodies into another room and stopped at the threshold. Bonnie looked at the sea of faces not seeing anyone familiar.

"What's going on, Caroline?"

The blond supernatural merely pointed west and Bonnie followed until her eyes ran into the last two people she wanted to see and the last two people who should be here.

"What _are _they doing here?" Bonnie whined and groaned at the same time.

"I don't know. Matt was the one who spotted them when they walked in together."

"Where's Matt now?"

"Off somewhere trying to mack on some girl. What are we going to do? We can't let Stefan know that they're here."

Bonnie threw up a hand in the air. "He can't keep hiding from them either." The two girls watched as the dark-haired couple pranced around like elves on crack. It was a pitiful sight in Bonnie's eyes.

Just as Bonnie was about to turn around, get Stefan and talk him into leaving which wouldn't be that hard, she was spotted.

Elena said something to Damon who looked over his shoulder at the two girls standing like statutes near the entryway of the room. His cerulean eyes traveled heavenward prior to him whispering something in Elena's ear and then walking off in the opposite direction. Pulling down the corset to her own costume, Elena made her way through the crowd and over to her friends.

"Hey! I'm so glad to see you guys. You guys look amazing. Isn't this party awesome?" the doppelganger said in one breath.

Caroline, who was not amused, folded her arms over her chest. "Cut the crap, Elena. What are you and Damon doing here?"

Hurt flashed in Elena's eyes for a second before they hardened. "So Damon and I can't ever leave the house and act like a normal couple because you two have a problem with him?"

Caroline's jaw dropped. Bonnie merely shook her head. It was funny how some people could gloss over the horrendous acts a person did as if they never meant anyone any harm, or as if it never happened all because they quote-en-quote loved them.

"Is that what you're telling me, Caroline?" Elena demanded.

"There are lots of things I want to tell you, Elena but now isn't the time. Stefan is _here._"

That brought Elena up short. Her whiskey colored eyes attempted to do a quick sweep of the room. Ever since she and Damon became an item she had gone out of her way to avoid Stefan. She knew her choice hurt him, crushed him, and in her own way to soften the blow she tried never to be in the same place at the same time as him. Their run-ins at school were unavoidable, but they had the rest of the town to consider. So far their chance encounters could fit on one hand. The odds of them being at the same fraternity costume party on the same weekend were pretty slim. But it happened anyways.

"I didn't know you guys were going to be here," Elena attempted to explain. She knew that this weekend her friends had gone on a college tour, neglecting to invite her, but she didn't know which college.

Elena had a sneaky suspicion that her boyfriend did. She wasn't so far up Damon's ass not to acknowledge he would orchestrate something like this.

"But Stefan is here?" Elena asked for clarification.

"Yes! I could have sworn I didn't stutter," Caroline chided. "You need to leave. Find your lapdog and scram before Stefan sees you."

"Look," Elena grabbed both of her friends' wrists and dragged them into a semi-quite corner of the house. "I'm tired of…always having to avoid stepping on toes and being sensitive to everyone's feelings. I know you guys don't like Damon. I understand why and I'm not trying to dismiss it, but he's my boyfriend. I want to spend time you and him but I feel like…like I'm being pulled in so many different directions and it sucks!"

Bonnie could do nothing but stare at her friend. Up until now she never really put herself in Elena's shoes. She couldn't fathom what it must be like to be with someone that was hated by everyone close to you. Elena wanted to spend time with her friends and keep her boyfriend happy, but it was exhausting work because absolutely _no one _got along with Damon, or more to the matter he didn't go out of his way to get along with others.

"We get dirty looks from _everyone,_" Elena went on. "It's not just you guys that don't agree with me being with Damon. The whole town is against our relationship and its suffocating. I'm falling in love with him and I can't enjoy it because everyone thinks I'm some…some two-faced whore."

Caroline swallowed thickly. She had to work overtime to get rid of the reputation she earned as being easy. So she could definitely commiserate.

"So you," Elena looked Caroline square in the face, "kicking me out of this party that's on neutral territory just hammers in how everyone back home treats us. We can't go anywhere and we can't do anything."

"Elena," Caroline stomped her foot on the ground hating the fact she was caving. "You're my friend and you know I want you to be happy, but…when you decided to be with Damon, did you really think that everyone would be okay with your relationship? I feel for you, sweetie, I honestly do, but if you're going to be with him, then its time you adopted some thicker skin."

"Its something I'm working on." Elena faced Bonnie who had been unnaturally quiet this whole time. "Do you want me to leave, too?"

"That's not my decision to make. I'm with Caroline, I want you to be happy but at the same time you need to be a big girl and live with the decision you made. If you can't handle it, then you're going to have to question whether having a relationship with Damon is worth the hassle. People are going to talk about you whether you do bad, good, or nothing at all. That's just life."

Elena wiped her cheek with her palm and took a deep breath. To date this was probably the longest conversation she had with her friends since she and Damon became official.

"I know and I'm learning," Elena said. "I just really wish we could all hang out together. Like we used to. Pause. "How is Stefan?"

A self-satisfied grin overtook Caroline's face. "Oh, Stefan is quite a _hand_ful isn't he, Bonnie?"

Bonnie was proud of herself that she didn't blush. "He's cool."

"I'd say he's the opposite of cool. Dude was practically an inferno not too long ago. He was dancing with this _really _hot girl. I mean they were so close together it looked like they were, well, having sex right there on the dance floor."

_You are going to get it! _Bonnie shot that proclamation through her eyes right at Caroline who tried not to laugh like a banshee at her expense.

Elena looked distressed for a moment. She wanted Stefan to move on and find happiness of course because that's what a good ex-girlfriend wants for her ex. Yet she couldn't exactly explain why she felt a small stab of jealousy pierce her heart.

Stefan had danced with someone else? But he hated dancing. Elena practically had to break his arm to get him to do more than a simple two-step with her. But he had danced with some…._tramp_ and the two of them according to Caroline looked like they were having sex.

Elena switched her thoughts. "Maybe I should find him and go say hi," she thought out loud.

"Oh, no you don't want to do that," Caroline took her friend by the arm. "Just find Damon and…try to have a good time. Bonnie and I…well more so Bonnie will keep Stefan occupied. He's been coming out of his little turtle shell and it's because of this chick right here," Caroline wrapped her other arm around Bonnie and pulled her tight against her.

The witch and the doppelganger locked gazes. Elena was sure that Caroline was trying to say something, albeit cryptically, and she was working overtime not to translate the message.

"You and Stefan have been spending time together? That's…good," Elena cleared her throat. She had seen them playing pool a few times and saw them conversing in the hallways at school, but Elena had foolishly thought that was all the interaction the two of them did.

For the first time since spotting her friends, Elena finally took an account of what Bonnie was wearing. Her eyes bulged for a second when she noticed the shortness of Bonnie's skirt, the fishnet stockings, the tight corset that made her boobs look spectacular, the makeup and hair.

It was almost like she was looking at a totally different person. Even when they were little kids and Halloween rolled around, Elena could count on Bonnie being covered up from head-to-toe. It was like she had a naturally built-in aversion to showing skin. If she wore a dress with thin straps, trust and believe Bonnie would be wearing a cardigan over it and knee high boots.

"Bonnie is our very own supernatural fixer," Caroline beamed. "She's helping rehabilitate the world one vampire at a time."

"Yeah," Bonnie jabbed Caroline in the rib and wiggled free. "I'm going to get something to drink."

Walking away from those two, Bonnie retraced her steps through the crowd. She didn't spot Stefan holding up a wall and she didn't see Damon either which concerned her. She found herself standing in the kitchen eyeing the red plastic cups that lined the center island.

"You don't want any of those," a teasing voice said impossibly too close to her ear. "They've all been roofied."

"You would know wouldn't you?" Bonnie turned around and folded her arms over her chest.

Damon made it no secret that he was giving her a very thorough once-over that made Bonnie feel as if he were stripping away her articles of clothing one piece at a time. That wasn't the first time he did that either.

As a peace offering, Damon extended his cup out to Bonnie. She made no move to take it. Hunching his shoulder Damon gulped down the beer.

"I know my little brother is around here somewhere licking his wounds and feeling sorry for himself, no doubt."

"If there's a point to this discussion I wish you'd get to it."

"All right, fine. Stop being a bitch and hang out with your friend my girlfriend Elena so she can smile again."

"_Excuse _me," Bonnie's arms fell to her sides but her hands balled themselves into fists. Her nostrils flared as she tilted her chin up in that superior way it did.

Damon ignored the warning, the implied threat that if he said one more thing that boarded on being assholish he could consider his life null and void.

"She's been doing nothing but moping around because you and Caroline are too selfish and stuck on yourselves to realize that she's in misery because no one likes to acknowledge how awesome and _right _I am for Elena."

Silence engulfed the space between them for a second before Bonnie barked a laugh. "Oh, this is classic. The number one motherfucker of Mystic Falls is going to stand before me," Bonnie placed her hands on her chest to emphasize her point, "and try to call me out. Let's get something straight, Damon. You live because I _allow _you to live. You're the fucking bottom feeder of the supernatural hierarchy, and I don't owe you or anyone else anything. Don't forget that."

Damon stepped closer to Bonnie, mouth tightened with anger. He poked her in the shoulder. "No, what you seemed to have forgotten _witch _is that I'm the reason you're alive in the first place. I could have taken you out that night, but I spared you. Trust if it comes down to that again I won't make the same mistake twice. I should have killed your ass when I had the chance."

"Damon!"

The vampire in question cringed and then put a whole three feet of space between himself and Bonnie. He turned around and saw the disbelief and disappointment on Elena's face.

"I can explain…that wasn't how it sounded."

Elena held up a hand. "Don't even try it. I heard what you said," she shook her head, and stared at Bonnie apologetically before glaring at her boyfriend. "Leave it to you to prove how right everyone is about you, Damon." Snorting, Elena turned on her heels and left the kitchen.

Damon slammed down the cup in his hand on the counter. When he looked at Bonnie, the smile on her face was smug. He wanted to wipe that smile among other things off, but he had to go hunt down his girlfriend and kiss her ass to forgive him for letting his mouth runaway like a kid going through puberty.

Just as he took a step to go after her, Bonnie's voice halted him.

"You were wrong about something, Damon. You might have turned my mother into a vampire all to save Elena, but you still killed me just the same."

He looked at her, _really_ looked at Bonnie and didn't see that self-righteous witch who thought she knew every gotdamn thing, but a young girl who lost yet another parental figure and was subsequently abandoned. And it wasn't circumstances that drove Abby away. It was by his own hand that started the domino effect that stripped Bonnie of having a relationship with her mother for a second time.

Damon hated dealing with people for this very reason. The guilt they could inflict on him. He turned to flee the room only to run into Stefan who looked crazed and itching for a fight.

"You gonna knock my lights out?" Damon questioned.

Stefan made a fist and threw it, but stopped. "No, because that would be doing your face a favor."

Bonnie snickered. Damon's eyes narrowed.

Stefan stepped out of the way and watched as Damon moved like a wrecking ball through the crowd.

With his hands behind his back, Stefan approached Bonnie. He cupped her cheek and ran the pad of his thumb over her soft skin. "I know you're fine," he began, "but we can talk about it if you want to."

Bonnie shook her head. "No, I'm just ready to get out of this corset so I can breathe."

A mischievous glint came into Stefan's eyes and Bonnie realized what she said.

"I meant," she stammered, "get out of this corset alone."

"I can assist you."

"I'm sure you can, but that won't be necessary. Let's just find Caroline and Matt and head back to the dorm."

Placing his hand on the small of Bonnie's back, Stefan led them out of the kitchen as the two went on a house-wide search for the other two members of their entourage. They found Caroline chatting away with a toga wearing tennis player that took some coaxing and strong arming on Stefan's part to steer her away. Matt was sandwiched between a pair of girls who couldn't stop laughing and giggling. He reluctantly left them behind but not without getting their numbers.

* * *

It was a quiet ride on the school provided van back to their dwellings. Matt and Caroline struck up a conversation as soon as they exited the van. Bonnie and Stefan hung back, their fingers occasionally brushing against each other as they walked.

The two blondes got missing in their rooms.

Bonnie slumped against the wall and looked up at Stefan. "Did you see or talk to Elena at all?" she asked.

Stefan shook his head. "I saw her from a distance and kept my distance. But I realized something was missing."

"What?"

"When I saw her I almost saw through her like she was another random girl at the party. Her ability to capture my full attention anytime she stepped into a room, it's not what it used to be."

A bit of glee sliced through Bonnie. Was it possible that Stefan was finally getting over her, or was he saying it trying to convince himself of a truth that might not yet be real?

Stefan could see the skepticism in Bonnie's olive green eyes. "You don't believe me."

"By high school standards you and Elena were the epitome of an 'It' couple. It's only been a couple of months since you guys…"

Stefan silenced her by placing his index finger over her red lips. "I don't care."

"You don't care about what?"

"I don't care how long it's been. Right here, right now I'm making a choice. I'm choosing to put my past behind me. I'm choosing to start over. I have to let her go in order to let someone else in. Someone who has been there for me, and had my back, and stood by my side even when she had no reason to. But this person has to choose me."

Bonnie swallowed reflexively. "She has."

"FINALLY!" said a muffled voice from behind room door number 117.

Stefan and Bonnie looked down the hall, then at each other before laughing. They sobered as the moment turned serious.

"I kissed you once but it wasn't the right time," Stefan cupped Bonnie's cheek between his hands.

"And now it is?"

"Yep." Stefan swooped in like an eagle driving under water to capture a fish. His lips covered Bonnie's cementing what was created on those bluffs back in early spring. He rolled his tongue over hers, consumed every moan and sigh of pleasure that was emitted from Bonnie's throat. He felt the cold, dark places within himself mending and becoming whole again, strengthening.

They were so connected, so in tune that nothing else mattered. In this kiss he tried convey how much her friendship meant to him, how much the sacrifices she made changed him. Things were so new between them that they were at an infancy stage, but what they had now was more than that.

Bonnie didn't want this moment to end. She felt drunk. High. Her heart pounded like a snare drum. For years it seemed she had waited for this moment to feel as if she actually had both feet planted on the ground, but she was too buoyant and felt like a balloon bobbing in the air. Stefan was a talented kisser. He was destroying strongholds and her own negative views about herself that she repelled love from those around her. All the negative experiences in her life seemed to be getting erased with the artful way he devoured her lips like a man starved.

She would need air soon, Stefan reminded himself, and then slowly released Bonnie's kissed swollen lips.

With them separated Bonnie coached herself to say something other than whoa or wow. "Magnifique."

Stefan chortle, "I don't think I've ever kissed someone into speaking another language." He wrapped his arms around Bonnie.

"There's a first time for everything."

"Yeah there is," he said suggestively. Bonnie blushed. "Let me walk you to your door."

The twosome walked all of fifteen feet. Stefan pounded on the door that flew open. Caroline was already dressed in her PJ's with a hand propped on her hip.

"Young lady do you know what time it is?"

"Sorry, _mom_ a watch doesn't exactly go with this outfit."

"Say goodnight to your date."

"Night, Stefan," Bonnie leaned forward for another kiss, but Caroline yanked her inside and promptly slammed the door on Stefan.

"Goodnight," he shouted before slinking off to his room.

Tossing her feather boa on the bed, Bonnie shook her head at her best friend. "You are so incredibly rude."

"We're not talking about me. We're gonna talk about you," Caroline jumped up and down on the twin sized mattress. "You kissed Stefan!"

"That wasn't exactly our first kiss."

Caroline made an undignified noise in the back of her throat and tossed a pillow at Bonnie who dodged out of the way. "You hag! You've been holding out on me. Deets! I need them," she commanded.

"Can I change first?" Bonnie argued. "Get comfortable."

"Fine," Caroline groaned knowing the suspense was going to kill her. "But hurry up."

* * *

When Stefan made it to his room he wasn't overly surprised to find Matt on his bed, remote in hand, channel surfing. The two dudes acknowledged each other with the lift of their head.

"So I take it it's a done deal?" Matt asked while Stefan entered the bathroom.

"So it is written so it shall be done," Stefan replied dramatically.

Matt snorted and found a basketball game to watch. "Just remember, Stefan, I'm an excellent shot."

Chapter end.

**A/N: Ya'll should know I have a love/hate relationship with Damon, but it's been leaning more towards the side of hate since the beginning of this season. So his encounters with Bonnie, well they won't always be pleasant in this story. I won't say that anything is official between Stefonnie, but they are slowly working their way towards it. Some more things were supposed to happen, but I'll save that for the next update which might not come until January. Until next time, thank you so much for reading and leaving me your thoughts. Enjoy your holidays and be safe! Love you!**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Your misery ends. It's an update. Yea! In the last update I borrowed the frat scene from 4x04 but I'll be going back (canonical speaking) to S3, because technically this is following certain events that happened during that season. There is lemony goodness ahead, and the rating has officially been switched to M *imitates deep voice* for mature. This goes without saying but thank you for reading and thank you for having patience with me! Review, review, **_**please**_** review. **

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

She really shouldn't have ordered that grande double chocolaty chip frappe from Starbucks, but she hadn't had one in a _really _long time and Bonnie figured there was nothing wrong with treating yourself. Especially when things have been quiet—supernaturally speaking—and no one mysteriously died of an "animal attack" that she knew of.

A smile blossomed on her face as her thoughts took a turn towards Stefan as they often did. It had been three weeks since they kind of, but not in any specific way, made things official. From the moment she laid eyes on him, Stefan had been the kind of guy Bonnie would have loved to be whisked off her feet by, but unfortunately he fell for her best friend—hopes dashed but she mustered on. Soldiered on because that was the type of person she was.

Bonnie wouldn't outright call herself clairvoyant. She was psychic and had gifts—yes—power when it decided to cooperate, but she couldn't have predicted that she and Stefan would be together.

Was she in love? She was certainly nervous around Stefan. Got butterflies whenever they were alone. He had a way of looking at her whenever he'd take his eyes off the road to stare at her over the console. His eyes would take on a predatory gleam, and that should have been reason enough to frighten her, but it wasn't fear Bonnie would feel percolating in her system, but expectancy.

She was happy, happier than she had been in months. Bonnie felt she was standing on a precipice about to face something she had never faced before, and she was excited but also a little scared.

Just as she rounded the corner which would take her to the bathrooms, Bonnie skittered to a stop. Her eyes widened and her mouth instantly dried up. Her heart was beating fast but she'd blame that on walking briskly, and not the fact she was alone with her old history teacher who had been MIA.

Bonnie wasn't sure of the details but council members had been getting targeted and were turning up dead. The number one suspect had been Alaric although he had been stabbed. Later his wounds had been ruled as being self-inflicted. Alaric had apparently flipped his lid and went after Meredith Fell, an altercation occurred, and Alaric fled.

Bonnie hadn't had the pleasure of dealing with Ric's alter ego. She personally only dealt with the teacher turned hunter who loved the bottle more than his liver and kidneys. He had been gone for a few weeks, and as usual no one really showed any true concern. Out of sight of mind was the mentality they all seemed to have adopted to avoid dealing with real issues. Either they were gloriously oblivious because it was easier to live in denial, or they were just that uncharacteristically unobservant and self-centered. Bonnie wasn't sure which.

"Did I startle you, Bonnie?" Alaric asked. "You look like you've seen a ghost, and last I checked that was Jeremy's specialty. A sinister grin bloomed on his face at least it looked sinister to Bonnie.

"Alaric," Bonnie said cautiously resisting the urge to look around for help or to take a step back.

She stood approximately five and a half feet away from him. He was leaning against the wall with his hands behind his back to which might be hiding a weapon. The only thing that separated them was the water fountain.

"You're back," Bonnie said lamely.

"Not exactly. I have been gone for a while but all of that is soon about to change."

Bonnie straightened her spine. She told her face to smile but the muscles weren't working. They were more so on strike.

"Alaric…"

The history teacher smiled, stretched his ever-present five o'clock shadow around his jaw. Bonnie might have had a day long crush on Alaric when he blew into town. He had definitely been a step up from that douche Tanner so to see what was becoming of him now, saddened her.

"You look so worried, Bonnie. And there won't be any need to be. Not before I'm done."

"Done doing what?"

Alaric pushed away from the wall and Bonnie was proud of herself. She didn't jump. He approached her and stood several inches too close to her, closer than he ever stood to her before.

Did crazy have a smell? Bonnie wasn't sure but that's exactly what she was picking up on Alaric. The fine hairs on the back of her arms and neck began to lift just as she raised her chin and refused to break eye contact.

Soulless. That's what his eyes said to Bonnie.

"The resident _witch. _How much they depend on you," Alaric sized her up. "But what I have to do, what has to be done shouldn't land on the shoulders of an eighteen year old girl. Though you could be of some use. I want you to send this message…"

The muscles in her body tightened up even more. Alaric whispered something in her ear and then he turned and marched down the other end of the hall.

Bonnie watched him walk away. Her bladder was close to exploding but that would have to wait.

* * *

This was their first time assembling since well…before Elena made her choice. They all met in a neutral place—the school quad once it cleared of students and teachers so they could discuss the lovely little message Alaric wanted Bonnie to spread around like good cheer and tidings.

Damon sat on top of one of the picnic tables while Elena sat close to him. Caroline sat opposite from Elena, while Bonnie and Stefan remained standing. Jeremy and Matt were the last ones to join them.

Bonnie started before Jabba Jaws Damon could start speaking. The less she heard of his voice the better.

"Alaric is back," Bonnie said without preamble.

As expected the murmurs began. Several people began speaking simultaneously. But the overall consensus was:

"Where has he been?"

"On a golf course in Florida," Bonnie replied snippily. "I don't know. And at this point it doesn't matter where he's been. He came back for one reason, one purpose and that's pretty much to kill anything with fangs. And now that he knows if he kills one Original their entire bloodline dies…"

"That's who he's going to be gunning for," Damon sucked his teeth. He was hoping he'd be able to make one friend he wouldn't have to turn around and kill. Well he was learning you couldn't have everything you wanted in life.

"So what are we going to do?" Caroline asked, distressed. She was tired of losing people she cared about. Not saying she cared anything about the Originals, but she knew that if Alaric tried to take one or all of them down the odds of his survival were pretty much nil.

"We aren't going to do anything," Damon said. "I'll take care of it."

And everyone knew what his way of taking care of something entailed.

Elena jumped up from the table and stared at him aghast. Bonnie quirked her lips wishing she could say the first thing to pop up in her mind: Chick are you really gonna act surprised by Damon's solution? It's his solution to everything.

"No," Elena ordered. "Damon he's your friend. You can't kill him."

"He stopped being my friend the second he got it into his head to try to wipe my kind off the face of the earth. This isn't personal, Elena."

Matt chimed in, "You can't just kill Mr. Saltzman. Not after all the times he's helped save your ass."

Bonnie and Caroline exchanged glances trying to fight off smiles.

"No way," Jeremy added his two cents to the conversation. "That's not going to work. Alaric is one of _us_."

Damon glared at Jeremy wondering why the hell was he here anyways. Matt, too. This meeting was for supes—not _humans. _"What the hell does that even mean?"

"It means he's family," Bonnie supplied the answer. "And you don't kill your family just because they pose a problem. You help them."

Damon and Bonnie locked horns and held them but Damon had been the one to look away.

As usual Elena looked to Stefan to knock some sense into his brother's head. He had never been as close to Alaric as Damon had, but unfortunately he didn't see any other way to deal with this problem. Alaric posed a threat to them. He knew the location of the last remaining white oak stake. He knew that Klaus was the patriarch of their bloodline. The man was simply a liability.

"Stefan," Elena pleaded in that small raspy voice of hers. "We have to find some other way to…deal with Alaric," she looked back at her boyfriend whose face was impassive. "Killing him won't solve anything."

"Yeah, well I beg to differ," Damon rebutted and then stared at his brother. "You know I'm right, Stefan."

All eyes were on Stefan and he didn't shift or show any kind of emotion. He looked down at his feet before bringing his eyes to his ex.

"I'm sorry, Elena. Alaric knows too much. He could expose us all to the Council. He knows where the last white oak stake is—,"

"I took care of that," Damon informed the group. "After Ric went off the rails I knew I had to move it. It's some place safe."

"I hope it's not in your sock drawer. That's _so_ creative," Caroline ribbed.

Bonnie bit her lip.

Now Damon was irritated. "Look, I don't even know why we're discussing this or trying to take a vote. You all know there's only _one _way to nip this whole thing in the bud. You don't like it well tough titty. You want to go sleep at night with a clear conscience? I said I'll take care of it so let me take care of it."

"Bonnie," Elena approached her other ally. "There's gotta be a spell or something that could get rid of Ric's urge to kill vampires."

Bonnie blinked as her eyebrows drew together. "Magic might be a lot of things but it's not a cure for someone with a split personality."

"Well…maybe what's happening to him _is _magical. Maybe he's under…I don't know a type of possession. If that's the case then there might be some way to break it."

"Okay well I'll just get on the phone and call Sam and Dean Winchester since they're the experts on exorcizing demons," Bonnie replied flippantly.

Stefan coughed to hide his laugh. Damon rolled his eyes but had to admire Bonnie's comedic timing today. Girl was on fire. Matt and Jeremy merely shook their heads, while Caroline briefly examined her nails. She was listening but she was also excellent at multi-tasking.

Elena was a little taken aback by Bonnie's cavalier attitude. Next to her, Bonnie had taken every emergency seriously, but today for some reason it was like she had no fucks to give. And it also seemed like she was in agreement with Damon's plan to kill Alaric. He might not have been impactful in Bonnie's life, but Elena had always assumed that Alaric was someone important to her.

Maybe she should have paid just a little more attention to her friends because other than Matt and Jeremy everyone else seemed like they were on board with Operation: Kill Alaric.

"Bonnie…" Elena's mouth open, closed, and opened again.

Bonnie sighed in resignation. Of course she would help find a way to save Alaric. Like everyone present he had lost a great deal as well, and he deserved saving.

"I'll look into it, but I'm not promising anything."

"Well," Damon clapped his hands together. "While Bonnie will be wasting her time looking for a solution that probably doesn't fucking exist, I'll be off putting my own plan into motion."

"Damon, come on!" Elena had reached her wits end with him. "I know you get off on being the bad guy, but for once could you not act like a heartless asshole and just wait? You go after him and I'll never forgive you for that."

Silence all around.

Elena cursing out Damon? Giving him an ultimatum? Surely she was jesting. Everyone was seeing it but they were having a hard time believing it. Even Damon appeared surprised.

His face hardened. He was well aware of the fact that Elena hadn't exactly forgotten the words that were exchanged between himself and the witch, and he did his best to apologize in the only way he knew how: hot sex, but apparently that hadn't been enough to appease her. And now this thing with Alaric…he knew he had to be shrewd. Still, the one thing he wasn't going to do and certainly not in front of a crowd was back down in order to make Elena feel like she won.

She could threaten him with excommunication all she liked but Elena would need him one day. They all would eventually.

Jeremy couldn't help but feel irked about what his sister just proclaimed. Elena was the queen of forgiveness—obviously—but what her declaration just translated into was if Damon killed Alaric then they were pretty much done. But Damon had killed _him _and yet she didn't waste any time hooking up with him.

Priorities. Out of Order.

Caroline was feeling strangely glad she came to school today.

Stefan and Bonnie caught the others gaze. Had their prayers been answered? Was Elena finally seeing the light? Damon wasn't some tragic misunderstood anti-hero who looked for love in all the wrong places and was on the shit end of karma. He was a bastard and nothing was going to change that.

"Whatever," Damon dismissed her words although he couldn't dismiss the icy cold feeling that coursed down his spine.

Elena wasn't speaking out of a heightened state of emotion—that much. All of her prior threats of walking away from him, ending their "friendship" had been hollow. But today she meant it. And he hated when someone tried to herd his actions like he was livestock. He was a vampire! He killed people. And he enjoyed it.

But he wasn't enjoying being called out and made into public enemy number one by his girlfriend in front of her sanctimonious boring ass friends. That he could do without.

Damon turned on his boots and walked off.

"So what now?" Matt asked. He was already running late for work, but this was more important than cleaning off tables, and wearing holes in the bottom of his sneakers for minimum wage.

Elena threw a hand up in the air. "I'll do my best to make sure Damon doesn't go after Alaric."

Caroline rose from the table. "I'll help with that."

"Me three," Jeremy volunteered. "I don't trust Damon to keep his distance from Ric. And it's pretty obvious he's pissed off which gives him even more incentive to do something stupid."

There was collective head nodding.

Stefan knew this was the part where he was supposed to tell everyone to leave Damon to him, but he had emancipated himself from older brother babysitting duty. Let Elena watch his ass. He was done.

"Are you going to look for someway to help Alaric, Bonnie?" Elena questioned meekly.

"I said I would, Elena."

Elena offered up a shaky smile. "Thank you, Bonnie. That means a lot to me."

"I'm doing this for Alaric not for you," Bonnie clarified.

Stefan placed his hand on the small of Bonnie's back. That move certainly garnered attention from those present yet the only ones who weren't surprised were Matt and Caroline.

Elena frowned and Jeremy glared.

"You ready?" Stefan questioned.

Bonnie briefly glanced at Elena prior to nodding. "I just have to get my bag. I'll see you guys." She and Stefan made their way to the parking lot, his arm wrapping around her shoulder.

Elena's jaw dropped.

Caroline willfully ignored Elena's expression as she dug her key out of her pocket. "Matt you need a ride to work?"

"No, I'm good Care thanks for offering."

"No problem."

"Can someone explain to me what's going on?" Elena said.

Caroline asked dubiously, "What?"

"Stefan and Bonnie…is something going on with them?"

Caroline shrugged. "If there is it's their business. I'm going to stock up on snacks before making my way to the boardinghouse. I have a taste for nachos." The blonde vampire wiggled her fingers and quickly got missing. Matt had slinked off to his truck as well.

The Gilberts stood alone wondering what alternate universe had they just found themselves in.

* * *

**The Bennett Residence**

Lace was no match for his teeth or his deft little fingers. Grayish-blue eyes concentrated on the swirls and loops of fabric covering her sun-kissed skin, focusing on the individual spindles of fiber that reminded Stefan of a spider's web. The color was a blend of fuchsia, amethyst, and blue which gave the garment its unique color. Against his tongue the material melted like snow hitting glass.

Fingers curled into his auburn locks while nails scraped against his scalp sending tendrils of pleasure rippling through him. All of his senses were alive as he loomed on top of his prey, devouring her with dizzying kisses and scintillating flicks of his tongue on her heated skin.

Bonnie moaned when Stefan dipped his lips to her neck again. His right hand was busy getting lost under the fabric of her shirt, his fingers running into her bra which was becoming an annoying impediment. Things between them hadn't exactly accelerated now that they admitted to having feelings for one another. Stefan, having come from a world where a man properly courted a lady though infused with more modern ways of showing his interest, for her sake held back. Bonnie was indecisive if she wanted to prolong this "honeymoon" period and simply get to the good stuff before it was too late.

There was no sense of urgency other than fighting for their lives, which was a game they played daily. Bonnie knew her utmost focus should be on finding some way to bring her teacher back from the damned. This seemed to be the new theme now: save the teacher, save the world. Danger was no longer a patent or monopoly that Elena wrote, produced, and starred in although at any given moment she might be snatched out of her bed at night and be used as bait once again.

That particular song and dance had lost its novelty a long ass time ago.

Her mind should be focused on the ancient pages bound in her grimoire and the ones she pilfered from the Martin's. Their archives had become her archives even if Bonnie wished she had inherited them another less gruesome way.

Yet all of that was put to the far recesses of her mind as she got lost once again in the moment. No man had ever been able to make her squirm this way. Stefan could spark her arousal with a single look or touch and for a second Bonnie was almost convinced she was going crazy. He had yet to taste her blood and he hadn't even brought it up, but little by little Bonnie wanted Stefan to bite her.

She had no idea where this part of her psyche was stemming from. Long ago, Bonnie had led the raid on killing all things fang, and here she was entangled with one on her bedroom floor.

Her silky hands ran over the exposed flesh of his muscled abdomen. Bonnie couldn't remember who had unbuttoned his shirt. It might have been a collaborative effort. Nonetheless, she greedily drank in the corded muscles that contracted and shifted under Stefan's olive skin. She traced each shape of his abs. He was warm stone beneath her finger.

"I should stop and let you concentrate on your assignment," Stefan whispered against her swollen lips before taking them again between his own.

Bonnie ignored his suggestion writing it off as ludicrous because why on earth would she want to stop this! In her mind she was making up for lost time. How many nights had she wasted burning the midnight oil looking, searching, and hunting for spells that would save the lives of her friends, right the wrongs of her enemies? How much time had she sacrificed doing the right thing to which only consequences were heaped on her shoulders for daring to toe the line between life and death? If anyone deserved some downtime it was her, and she planned to get as much of it as possible.

Cocking her left leg higher against Stefan's thigh, she easily switched their positions and now she was on top. Their lips never separated for longer than a millisecond. His breath because her breath; his tongue clashed against her tongue. When Stefan lightly nibbled her lips Bonnie bit his hoping he'd get the message of what she wanted him to do.

Stefan was astute enough to figure out what Bonnie was silently asking him. But he didn't think he had enough control to go there with her. His relationship with human blood had been acrimonious at best. It made him smell himself, made him become the ruthless asshole he despised, made him hurt people. And the last thing he wanted to do was hurt Bonnie more than his actions in the past had already done.

Except, he couldn't quite shake the _urge _to want to drink her blood. He was a vampire. That's what they do. That's who they are. Bloodrinkers. There was no getting around it. There was no curbing it because it was an entity much like his soul, and as many "human" customs he tried to adopt, he'd never be human again. If he went there with Bonnie—consumed her blood with her full permission—things wouldn't just change or alter things could torpedo between them. New emotions would spring up like flowers in May. Protectiveness. Possession. Power. Passion would be some of the emotions shared between them. Not to say he didn't feel those things for Bonnie now. He did. In buckets. But it would only hasten, deepen, lampoon until he'd be…

Just like Damon.

Willing to sacrifice an entire city of innocents just to protect the woman he loved.

_Love? Did he love Bonnie? Was it too soon for that?_

The vampire side of Stefan's mind was asking: What the hell was the problem? The last remaining humanity in Stefan said: Don't even think about going there because you won't like who you become if you do.

And with Bonnie's help, her doting affection, her teasing smiles, her openness, her caresses, Stefan was becoming someone he was learning to like again.

He didn't want to lose that.

Her fingers running along his jaw broke Stefan out of his reverie. She was staring down at him with half-lidded eyes, warm skin, a rapidly racing heart, and blood rushing to all her erogenous zones. Like a fat grape she was prime for picking.

Stefan's hands tailed down the center of her back before molding to the shape of her ass. He squeezed. Her breath hitched and Bonnie began to feel a noticeable poke. A corner of her lips lifted in a knowing smirk and she cleared the space between them and kissed Stefan. Deeply. Ardently. Filled with all the power an eighteen year old witch could offer.

Which was a lot.

Right there, simmering on the surface, Stefan tasted her power. He couldn't describe it. If he tried he wouldn't get it right. But there was more life in Bonnie than a stadium full of people. He would liken what he sensed in her to Bonnie opening her mouth and consuming the sun. She was a source of energy, a beaming light in so much darkness. Vitality. Changing and innovating.

He might not be able to give into what she wanted, but there was one thing he could do.

Swapping their places again, Bonnie glared up at him in awe when her back hit the floor. Her long hair fanned out around her head like a misshapen halo. Or a protective shield.

Stefan's hands balled the material of her long-sleeved shirt and with one powerful tug he ripped it clean down the middle.

Color rushed up starting from her diaphragm leading a charge all the way to her forehead. "I liked that shirt," Bonnie said dryly.

"Then I'll just have to buy you a new one," Stefan said and began to kiss a trail heading south.

Bonnie's breath rushed out quicker now because she knew what Stefan was about to do, and _that _had _never _been done to _her _before.

Was she ready for that? Could she just lay there, sprawled out on the floor, and let no man—excuse her vampire—go where no vampire had gone before?

Bonnie snapped her eyes shut but then forced them open. She wanted to witness this. She wanted to see it happen with her malachite eyes.

Her belt was being unbuckled, pants unbuttoned, the zipper going down. Bonnie knew she should stop this, but why fight it? Why not give into being this desirable siren that had managed to make a powerful creature like a vampire want to drink at her fount.

Stefan pulled her jeans down revealing she was wearing panties that matched her bra. Once her jeans pooled on the floor behind him, Stefan merely admired Bonnie. Her hairless legs, sculpted calves, those thick thighs which were slightly quivering under his scrutiny. Finally his deep-set eyes landed on that inverted triangle hidden behind a thin barrier of silk.

"Do you want me to stop?" Stefan asked gravelly.

Pulling a corner of her bottom lip between her teeth Bonnie was unsure of which response to give. She thought for a moment and the answer came to her as clear as day.

She shook her head, "No I don't want you to stop."

Shrugging off his flannel shirt so it wouldn't get in the way and so Bonnie wouldn't feel like the only one who was underdressed for the occasion, Stefan lightly cupped her bent knees and began to part them their separate ways.

Bonnie's chest rose and fell and then she stopped breathing when Stefan reached for the waistband of her panties. Lifting her hips off the floor to assist him, Stefan worked the material down. Bonnie looked away unable to watch the desire on his face, nor the tick hammering away at his jaw. It was too intense, too much for her to sustain for the moment.

Once she was revealed to him, Stefan wet his bottom lip. He ignored his own need to be touched and decided this was for Bonnie.

He didn't dive in like Bonnie had been expecting. Instead he began by placing butterfly kisses along her navel and then slowly he made his way between her thighs, his head nudging her legs farther apart.

At first she felt his breath flutter against her. Soft and ticklish. Then one of his thick fingers prodded her gently, opening her a little. Bonnie jumped when his icy tongue made contact with her there, and she continued to jump the more he did it. The more he lapped away at the crystallized drops of dew that leaked from her center, the longer Bonnie wanted this moment to last.

Her skin was super heated. The unlit wicks of the candles in her room began to burn at alarming heights.

Soon the sounds of her room were filled with Stefan's growls, Bonnie's moans, and pants. She was reaching her pinnacle and Bonnie felt the control on her powers slip for a second. The sink faucet and shower turned on involuntarily. Her closet door opened and closed as well as the windows. The lights flickered and her furniture began to rattle against the floor.

Stefan was way too busy to pay attention to any of that. He was eating his dessert and he wasn't about to stop. Not until he got seconds and because he always had a gluttony problem, he might go back for thirds.

She was sweet, so edible that his fangs, of their own volition, lengthened, but Stefan was mindful of them. When he glanced up at Bonnie he was no longer staring at her with bluish-gray eyes, but leaf green eyes surrounded by blood-red sclera.

Bonnie looked down and saw that. She should have screamed but instead she grabbed Stefan by the crown of his head to keep him right where he was.

"_Please…don't…stop…"_

As if he had a choice by this point. With her being so saturated, so wet it wouldn't be all that difficult to slide right into her warmth, but Stefan kicked that idea to the curb. That would have to be Bonnie's choice. And he wasn't going to make it for her, nor coax her into making it prematurely.

Breathing had nearly become obsolete for Bonnie. She wanted Stefan to touch her in other places. There was so much more of her to feel. Blindly she reached for one his hands which had pretty much been fused to her hips to keep her still. Prying it off she placed it where she wanted it to be.

Stefan squeezed her breast through her bra. Not satisfied with that he pulled the lacy cup down and felt her bare flesh contouring to the palm of his hand. Her nipple instantly pebbled and he twisted it between his thumb and forefinger. He did the same with her neglected breast, playing with both nipples making them stand straight hard and rigid like pencil erasers.

Stefan's tongue worked faster, swiping across that sensitized bundle of nerves before sinking in her deep pink well.

That sent her careening over the edge. Bonnie saw stars and white-hot light behind her lids as her body fractured into a million pieces like a chemical explosion.

Bonnie grabbed her hair and screamed. Her body jerked hard and then it was literally lights out in her bedroom.

Their hushed breathing filled the silence of her room. Stefan pulled away from Bonnie, licking his moistened lips. "I'm guessing I wasn't very good at that," he joked cheekily.

Bonnie's bones were jelly. She couldn't even lift her pinky toe. "I'm cooked."

Stefan laughed, grabbed the folded throw blanket hanging on the edge of her bed, laid down beside Bonnie and covered them up. She snuggled into his chest.

"No one has ever done that," Bonnie panted. She was waiting to feel embarrassed but it was noticeably absent.

Stefan smiled, pleased. He wanted to ask how it was for her, but her darkened bedroom was evidence enough she enjoyed herself. Call him wanting to indulge his typical male ego, but he wanted oral confirmation that he satisfied his woman.

His woman. Bonnie—his. He liked the sound of that very much.

"I know I don't need to ask," Stefan began tentatively, "but did you like it?"

Bonnie couldn't see his features clearly in the dark, but she figured Stefan might be wearing an apprehensive expression on his preternaturally handsome face.

Instead of replying with words, Bonnie cupped the back of his neck and drew him down, capturing his lips with hers, tasting herself. It was…a weird taste. Not sweet. Not salty. Tangy—yes, and something else, something she's never tasted before obviously.

When Bonnie pulled away she entwined her fingers with Stefan's. "I didn't like it. I loved it!"

Stefan's heart had frozen with horror when Bonnie admitted to not liking it, but it did burst with pride when she said she loved it.

Bonnie turned coy. She wanted it again but she didn't want to come off as being…a nympho.

Knowing her as well as he did, Stefan who could see her face as plain as day in the night decided to take the pressure off Bonnie.

"Get on the bed and get on your knees," he whispered. "It feels even better from the back."

Bonnie didn't need to be told twice.

* * *

**Two days later…**

Screwing on the top of a water bottle, Bonnie stared down at the mixture of herbs that had been diluted with spring water. After spending a solid twenty-four hours with Stefan and his clever tongue, Bonnie had managed to find a way to curb Alaric's homicidal double in one of her Grams' old journals. There were certain herbs found in nature that could help stabilize a person—mentally. She hoped it worked. But the only way to test it was to get Alaric to drink it.

Of course when Bonnie tried to explain how herbs were supposed to keep a leash on Alaric, Damon had been the loudest in vocalizing his objection to this plan. Naturally everyone ignored his ranting because Damon had always been of the belief that if he wasn't the mastermind behind a plan it wouldn't work. The others were willing to take the least bloody road to solving this latest crisis, and were laying all their chips on this hand.

Elena was on her way over to collect the concoction along with a month's supply of herbs. They were taking a chance of trusting Alaric to drink this potion without supervision. He had shown up at the Gilberts professing to be the man they had come to know, and not his sadistic twin who only wanted to wipe the earth clean of vampires. Naturally, Damon had been the one to put him through several "tests" to make sure he was telling the truth.

The options had been laid down before Alaric. Either he took the herbs or have his heart ripped out by his pseudo best friend or the other town villain Niklaus Mikaelson.

Alaric chose the herbs.

The doorbell sounded and Bonnie opened the door.

"Hey," Elena swiped a strand of long dark hair behind her ear.

"Hey," Bonnie replied and stepped aside so her friend could enter the house.

It was plain, to both of them that their friendship was in a weird vortex. Bonnie still very much valued Elena as a friend but she knew for her own sanity she needed to put a little distance between them. And that distance was slowly becoming an entity that would soon have a personality of its own.

"It's ready," Bonnie said unnecessarily just to have something to say.

Elena nodded. "Thank you so much for doing this for Alaric, Bonnie. I know things are weird between us and we don't talk like we used to. But I really do appreciate everything you've done and not just for me, but for everyone," nervous laughter escaped Elena. "We'd all be dead if it weren't for you. So thank you."

It warmed Bonnie's heart considerably to _finally _get some recognition. She offered Elena a wide smile, but she wasn't showing teeth.

"It's what I'm good at, I guess," Bonnie replied sheepishly before making her way to the kitchen to collect the bottle and herb filled Ziploc bag. She handed the items over to Elena who stared at the bag dubiously.

"What?" Bonnie asked.

Elena gave up trying on not trying to smile. "This looks like a bag of weed."

"Well if you're pulled over by the cops just tell him it's natural, or asks if he wants to smoke some."

Both girls shared a laugh before sobering. "How have you been?" Elena asked.

"I've been good. Better than expected actually."

That much was certainly true, Elena thought. There was an inward glow emitting from her friend. A glow that had been absent since…well for a long ass time.

"Caroline is organizing another dance. No matter how many of these dances end with someone's death she still holds out hope that it'll be epic!" Elena said dramatically.

"That's Caroline," Bonnie agreed. "And these past few dances we've gone to have been epic but for all the wrong reasons. I want to bail, but I know I'll never hear the end of it if I do." Pause. "I'm guessing that you're going?"

Elena rubbed her lips together. "I am. With Damon."

Bonnie said nothing. She knew this was the part where she should have tried to get the scoop on what happened after Damon made his rude ass comments to her at the frat party, and how Elena convinced him not to go after Ric, but the less details Bonnie knew of Elena's relationship the easier it would be for her not to pass judgment.

"Actually," Elena said when Bonnie didn't take the bait to ask her probing questions about the current status of her relationship, "do you mind if I borrow that pearl broche your dad got you a couple of years ago? It would go really well with my flapper dress."

Bonnie blinked. "Flapper dress? I thought this year's decade's dance was covering the eighties?"

"Oh, Caroline changed it or Rebekah changed it," Elena frowned more like grimaced at having to say the Original's name. "It's been switched to the twenties. I don't know any dances outside of the Charleston that was popular back then."

Bonnie shook her head. "Yeah. The broche is in my jewelry box on my dresser."

"Okay, I'll get it."

With Elena gone, Bonnie cleaned up the kitchen.

In Bonnie's bedroom, Elena smiled feeling a little nostalgic. It had been a few months since the last time she stepped foot in Bonnie's sanctum. That caused her smile to dip a little once Elena realized how entrenched she had been with the Salvatore's. If she wasn't with Stefan she had been with Damon and periodically she might have been with her friends, but only to talk about those vampire siblings. Weekends with her friends had turned into sleepovers at the boardinghouse. And any time one of her friends survived a life-threatening crisis, where had she been? Not being a support system to her friend, but crying on Stefan's shoulder. The girl who used to put everyone's needs before her own had turned self-absorbed. She had become a bad friend. Elena's hopeful mood was turning sour and she thought it best to get the broche and leave before her guilt became an ulcer.

Rifling through a cluster of jewelry, Elena found the broche and snapped the hood of the box closed. Then her eyes caught sight of something. It was buried under a few of Bonnie's old English papers.

Her eyes were looking at an image. Four images to be exact. Four black and white photos of her best friend in a one of those photo booths that was popular at carnivals. In each wallet sized image she saw Bonnie smiling along with the person sitting next to her.

In one picture Bonnie was facing the camera while her companion had been staring at her in profile. In the next picture, both of them were staring straight ahead—their eyes crossed. The third image was of Bonnie with her head tilted back as if she were in the throes of passion, and the person sitting beside her had her throat in his mouth. And in the final photo they were kissing.

Blood rushed to Elena's head making her feel queasy and light-headed. She dropped the photo as if it were a snake aiming to bite her. Stefan and Bonnie were together? They were seeing each other? Elena knew they hung out but she honestly thought that was the extent of it. How long had this been going on? When were they going to tell her? Why hadn't they told her?

Bonnie entered her bedroom and saw the crestfallen expression on Elena's face. "What's wrong?"

"When were you going to tell me?" Elena asked lowly.

Bonnie stared at her perplexed. "Tell you what?"

Elena picked up the photo and almost jabbed it in Bonnie's face. "This!"

Bonnie took a step back and resisted tapping her foot against the floor. "Well clearly this wasn't how I wanted you to find out by snooping through my things. Elena…"

"Just…tell me truth," the girl in question interrupted. "Are you and Stefan…together?" tears were gathering in Elena's eyes. She thought that knowing Stefan had moved on and was happy would make her happy, but she wasn't sure if she could deal with her best friend being the source of his newfound happiness. Deep down Elena knew it was _wrong_ to feel that way but she couldn't exactly explain why her heart felt like it was being ripped clean down the middle.

Licking her lips, Bonnie stiffened her spine. "We are." When Elena didn't fly off the handle Bonnie continued. "We haven't been together long. Things didn't become official until after we got back from the college tour at Whitmore."

Elena did a quick calculation of how much time had passed since then. It might have been three weeks.

Bonnie, in a sense could see why Elena would be upset but from what she was witnessing it was like she had been betrayed. And everyone knew Elena was in no position to throw stones.

"I have to go," Elena said abruptly.

She rushed past Bonnie who was quick on her heels. "So that's it?" Bonnie questioned. "You have a problem with me being with Stefan?"

Elena, hand poised on the doorknob looked up at the ceiling. "I honestly don't know how I feel about that."

"Stop lying. You don't like it. Why? Because it's Stefan and he's not supposed to love anyone other than you? Or it's me? I'm only supposed to care about Jeremy? Or I'm a witch and witches don't need love? Which is it, Elena? I didn't say _anything _when you hooked up with Damon even when I had reasons to. I respected your choice even if I didn't agree with it."

Swallowing normally was becoming difficult for Elena. She knew Bonnie was speaking the absolute truth, but her stubbornness was refusing to allow her to see things rationally. It wasn't about not wanting Stefan to move on. It was about…it was about…

He wasn't supposed to care about Bonnie. At least not in the way where it could transform into romantic love. Stefan's world had revolved around her. She was the anchor to his humanity, and it was a position that Elena realized she took for granted in retrospect. Now for Stefan's affections to shift to her best friend, Elena felt like she was losing Stefan all over again.

"You don't like vampires," Elena argued lamely.

Bonnie scoffed. "If that were the case do you think Caroline and I would be friends? If I honestly didn't like vampires don't you think I would have killed Stefan and Damon when I had the chance? And you know I had many chances."

"You're right…and that's why I think this conversation should end and I should go before we say something we'll regret. I'll…make sure Alaric gets this."

"No, we should talk about this because it's not going to go away simply because you want to ignore it," Bonnie countered. "Stefan and I are together. It's a problem because you loved him or you still do. Is that it?"

Elena shifted on her feet, unable to reach Bonnie's eyes. "Alaric is waiting for me."

Without another word said, Elena left.

Bonnie sighed heavily. Well that went well.

Chapter end.

**A/N: If you read A Kiss Goodnight you know about the confrontation more like showdown that happened between Elena and Bonnie when Elena found out the truth about Stefonnie. I obviously didn't want to repeat myself by having them getting into a physical altercation and screaming match. I think this goes more in line with how Elena would have reacted on the show with her wanting to deflect whereas Bonnie wanting to deal with it right then and there. Naturally things are far from kosher and it'll be interesting to see if Elena will ask herself some hard questions while Stefonnie continues to bloom. **

**And I don't remember everything that happened with the Crazy Alaric arc. I kind of tuned out his character once Matt Davis made those asinine racist comments about Bonnie on Twitter. So if I didn't get the details just right, aw well. And I won't be following what happened on the show concerning Ranger Ric to the letter. Hoped you enjoyed this, kittens, and prayerfully it won't take so long for me to update again. You know what's a good, outstanding motivation...reviews! Love you guys!**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Hello kittens, here's the latest.**

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

Seduction was not something she was accustomed to. Bonnie pegged herself as not being one of those girls who could turn a first date into a marriage proposal. To date the most romantic gesture anyone had made to her was when she showed up at the Gilbert's for a night of spell searching and Jeremy had surprised her with Chinese food—still in the cartons—and a few lit candles on the coffee table. That had taken place after they first swapped spit, and it had taken her off guard.

Now here she was, standing while Stefan covered her eyes with a delicate piece of black silk. She shivered a bit when his lips brushed against the shell of her ear.

"No peeking," he teased.

"Yeah, I'm not sure if I'm a fan of being blindfolded," Bonnie muttered dryly. "Where are you taking me?"

"If I tell you it would definitely ruin the surprise. Just go with the flow. You trust me, right?"

"About as far as I can throw you."

"And considering how far you can throw a vampire that means you trust me infinitely more than I deserve."

Bonnie smiled because like Stefan she was remembering the time Damon tried to test the strength of her newly endowed powers when they were planning on taking down Klaus. With just the extension of her arm she had sent the dark-haired Salvatore sailing across the living room, and over a table. In all honesty, Bonnie had gone easy on Damon because she didn't make it a habit of being a show-off.

Sighing, Bonnie relented to Stefan's will. Besides she was excited on top of being curious and a tiny bit apprehensive about what he had planned. It was painfully sad that she wasn't used to people doing nice things for her. At school if a guy or girl held the door open for her it floored Bonnie. She had been unfortunately conditioned not to expect much from people.

Stefan took Bonnie by the hand and began to lead her down Laurel Avenue. He looked up at the huge clock tower in the center of downtown Mystic Falls noting the time. It was a little after eleven o'clock. There was hardly any foot traffic as most of the stores that lined the main strip had closed their doors hours ago. It was just the two of them and it was exactly the way Stefan preferred it.

Being alone with Bonnie like this sent Stefan flying back through time where he used to make these grand overtures for ladies he courted. In many ways he was getting back to basics because as old-fashioned as he could be, he was undoubtedly a romantic at heart. And when he loved, he loved _hard. _

For weeks Stefan had tried to temper, put a leash on his feelings when it came to Bonnie. He didn't want to add any pressure on her to feel what was already rushing through his system. He knew that earning her trust was the first step in this process, and things were so precarious that a whisper against him could destroy everything. Plus, he was bracing himself for the possibility that though Bonnie may enjoy spending time with him, may like him, that might be the extent of her feelings. Of course Stefan didn't believe that because he often caught Bonnie just staring at him as if their relationship was too good to be true, that it was unreal. In many respects he shared her same sentiment.

Stefan stopped walking the second they reached their destination. He wrapped Bonnie in his arms. "Hold on to me," he whispered.

Panic swept through Bonnie which caused her heart to pound. "What are you about to do?"

He didn't answer, but grinned. Stefan bent his knees a little and then he and Bonnie shot off the ground like a rocket traveling at a speed Bonnie hadn't been expecting. She screamed a bit and buried her face in his chest hoping her stomach would catch up with the rest of her because it was still on the ground.

Within a second her feet were back on solid ground, but that didn't mean Bonnie released her Kung-Fu grip on Stefan who lightly chuckled and kissed her forehead.

"Are you going to let me go any time soon?" he asked as his lips twitched.

"No!" Bonnie shrieked.

"It's your choice, but you might want to reconsider when you see…this," Stefan snatched off the blindfold.

Bonnie blinked her eyes several times before they widened. They were standing on the top of some building that much was obvious, but the roof was a garden. Bonnie knew this place, had wanted to visit this roof-top nursery but never got the opportunity. Rows of flowers in a myriad of colors surrounded them. She smiled and laughed giddily before hugging Stefan.

"Stefan I can't believe…"

"There's more to see," he interrupted Bonnie, and taking her by the hand again, he led her to the center of the roof where there was a blanket spread out that was surrounded by vanilla scented candles.

Bonnie clapped her hands over her mouth. She couldn't believe it. Stuff like this happened to girls who had pale skin, blue eyes, and blond hair and could command attention just by breathing. It certainly didn't happen—or more to the matter she had never witness it happen—to girls who looked like her. Bonnie's viridian eyes found Stefan's who was cataloguing all of her emotions.

"What's the occasion?" Bonnie asked as calmly as possible.

"Happy Birthday."

Bonnie laughed and took a seat on the blanket. Stefan joined her. "My birthday was three months ago," she reminded him petulantly.

Stefan hunched a shoulder and then reached over to his right and pulled out a bottle of champagne and two glass flutes. He passed one over to Bonnie.

"I missed the opportunity to wish you a Happy Birthday then so I want to make up for it now."

"Thank you," Bonnie mumbled quietly and then squeaked when Stefan popped the cork of the bubbly and filled her glass.

Once his own glass was full, Stefan held up it in the air. Bonnie followed suit. "I'm not good with speeches," he began and was cut off when Bonnie pressed her fingers against his lips.

"So no speeches. This is enough. I've never…no one has ever done anything this thoughtful for me before, and I'm trying not to swoon."

The witch and the vampire smiled at one another and then tapped their glasses together.

"Why am I expecting a Mariachi Band to spring out of nowhere?" Bonnie looked around the roof a bit distractedly.

"No band," the younger Salvatore stretched out on the blanket.

Bonnie scrunched up her nose when carbonated bubbles flew up her nostrils. "So this is what it's like to be your girlfriend?"

Stefan bobbed his head. "More or less. There are benefits involved, of course."

Arching a brow, Bonnie asked "And what might those benefits entail?"

"I'd drive you to and from school when you're not in the mood to drive. I'd cook for you, massage your feet, occasionally do your homework, run your bath water, help you learn and try out some spells, beat up any guy that tried to hit on you, you know the norm."

Smiling until her cheeks were hurting, Bonnie drained what was left of her champagne and then snuggled up beside Stefan.

"What about washing my car and cleaning out the gutters?" Bonnie said flippantly. "Those things aren't going to do it themselves."

"Maybe, but only if you're good. So what does it mean to be Mr. Bonnie Bennett?" Stefan smiled.

Bonnie sighed as she focused her eyes on the night sky. "I don't know. I guess it means you'd be protected and woobified to a certain extent."

Stefan pursed his lips in disapproval, and then snorted.

"But it means you'd be happy. I think…I think I can make you happy."

"You don't sound too confident about that," Stefan played with a strand of Bonnie's hair.

"There's just a lot of pressure," Bonnie made a restless motion with her shoulder. "My track record in the making someone happy department isn't all that stellar."

"Screw Jeremy," Stefan retorted vehemently. "One man's folly is another man's opportunity. I can thank him because you're free and now we're together."

Angling her neck against the blanket, Bonnie stared at Stefan. "You really mean that?"

"I do. No matter what anyone else has to say I'm with you because I want to be. I don't have any ulterior motives. I like who I am when I'm with you. Okay, Bonnie?"

"Okay."

Stefan's eyes, deep-set and intense bored into hers. The night air was a little on the chilly side but it wasn't completely uncomfortable, and it didn't matter anyways because Bonnie was beginning to feel the heat, the electric sizzle take over the longer she held Stefan's gaze. Her eyes did a revolution around his face. It was just so damn perfect it was slightly unfair. There wasn't a part of him that didn't fascinate Bonnie. From his sharp nose, his rosebud mouth, down to his proud jaw, which gave his face a slight boyish quality, Stefan Salvatore made Bonnie's heart go sploosh.

Bonnie was thankful for the fact her relationship was Stefan wasn't built merely out of carnality. They had their moments were kissing became feverish and she nearly succumbed to his talented mouth and practically begged for him to go where no one else had gone before. But Stefan would always apply the brakes before they tipped over the edge with no rope to climb back up.

It often left Bonnie feeling frustrated because she knew she should take her time and truly examine her feelings for Stefan. There was still so much ground to cover before even thinking about taking the next step, but she could admit to feeling a little impatient and discouraged because of her own inexperience.

How exactly would she measure up? Would Stefan be happy with her? Would she be able to quench and satisfy all his needs? Bonnie had no way of knowing this and she was simply too embarrassed to broach the subject, but she knew they needed to have "the talk".

"What's on your mind?" Stefan traced the shape of Bonnie's lips with his finger.

"We've been together for how long?"

"A few weeks."

"And it's much too early for…you know?" the young witch hinted clumsily.

"Bonnie…I'm not in a rush to do anything," Stefan kissed the tip of her nose. "We have plenty of time for that. Unless…you're ready?" he grinned.

Bonnie's eyes narrowed. "I'm not."

And his grin turned into a pout. "I figured as much. Do you think I'm going to run off because we're not having sex?"

Bonnie felt her cheeks heating and she suddenly found it difficult to maintain eye contact. Stefan knew she was trying to hide and forced Bonnie's chin up so she'd have no choice but to look at him.

He repeated his question. "Do you think that if we don't have sex I'm going to lose interest and walk away?"

"No…I know you have more integrity than that…but you have urges."

"So do you," he pointed out.

Bonnie gulped. Her urges had been dormant until he unleashed them by eating her coochie like a starved man.

"I can control myself," Stefan told her plaintively. "And being here with you like this, kissing you, feeling your skin, it's enough for me."

"Is it really?"

"Well," Stefan said and then pulled Bonnie on top of him not bothering to finish his sentence.

Taking her gently by the back of the neck he pulled her closer and sealed his lips over hers. Bonnie moaned into the kiss and adjusted herself until her dips and curves fell into alignment with Stefan's.

The insatiable vampire tunneled one hand under the hem of Bonnie's shirt. He could never be satisfied with just kissing her because kissing sparked a frenzied response in him demanding he do more, touch more of her ridiculously soft skin. Bonnie was spice against his tongue, heat against his hands, and controlling the rambling beast inside himself took heaps of self-control he sometimes didn't possess.

And possess her he wanted to do more than anything.

His fingers crashed into her bra clasp and quickly flicked it open. Bonnie wanted to pull away because she felt she was drowning, but she couldn't stop herself. Not even if the world was ending. Stefan had a way of closing off her common sense that it was frightening. Whenever she was with him like this she threw caution to the wind. Go with the flow he told her earlier, and that's exactly what she wanted to do.

With her bra no longer an impediment, Stefan slid his fingers over Bonnie's ribs until they traced the underside of her breast before taking the mound in his hand. He squeezed her soft flesh and felt her nipple immediately pebble and harden against his palm. Stefan slipped his tongue deep in Bonnie's mouth and then flipped her on her back.

"Ah," rushed out of Bonnie and she watched as Stefan made a journey south. As he went down, her shirt and bra was being pushed up until her chest was exposed. Her heart beat wildly in her ears drowning out all other sounds, and she arched her back accordingly, offering herself up.

"Don't move," Stefan said in a voice that sounded more feral than anything else.

Bonnie didn't have a chance to question why before she felt the swipe of his tongue run horizontally across her engorged nipple and then his teeth were enclosing around her skin.

Stefan jerked a bit when Bonnie's fingernails raced across his scalp, almost burrowing into it. He didn't bite down hard enough to break skin, yet with each swipe of his tongue he could practically taste the coppery flavor of her blood right there under her fragile human flesh.

He confided in Bonnie that kissing and fondling was enough for him, hopefully he wouldn't make himself out to be a liar. He wanted her. His dick ached for her at night, seeking out a warm sheath to fill to the hilt, but there had been nothing there to take the edge off but a cold hand and fantasies.

Not giving Bonnie the chance to catch her breath, Stefan directed his attention to her neglect breast and showed it the same kindness.

Piercing her eyes shut, Bonnie clawed at his back, neck, and scalp wanting to find someway to relieve the pressure throbbing between her legs. She was seconds away from hyperventilating, but there was no way in the world Bonnie wanted Stefan to stop. He was just _too_ good at this.

Things were quickly spiraling out of control the second Stefan felt Bonnie's hand fumbling with his belt. Pulling up from laving her breasts and neck, he tried to clear the lust from his gaze.

"What are you doing?" he said very quietly.

Bonnie's eyes sprang open and crashed into Stefan's confused orbs. "I thought we were…I thought you might want…"

Stefan grabbed a hold of Bonnie's hand and pulled it away. He unzipped his pants and then taking her same hand, placed it inside his fly. The flames of the candles began to burn higher.

"Oh," Bonnie gulped the moment she touched his hardened prick. "W-what do you want me to do?"

"Move your hand up and down," Stefan directed. "Before we go and take that final step we need to learn what the other likes. I like kissing your breasts, you like when I kiss your breasts, and I definitely love eating your pussy, but I like being jacked off by a hand that doesn't belong to me."

Sensory overload Bonnie wanted to say. Instead she shyly looked away. She was sure her cheeks were so red they were flaming.

Stefan slid up Bonnie's body until they were nose-to-nose. "And you're going to have to get used to hearing me talk…vulgarly. It's a side of myself that stays buried for obvious reasons. I want to be candid with you, Bonnie. Unadulterated. Do you think you can handle that?"

The witch in question felt her mouth drying up. She never would have thought this side existed in Stefan. His explicit wild side. And Bonnie hadn't realized this whole time that she was in fact moving her hand up and down Stefan's penis.

"I'll," she cleared her throat. "I'll try."

Stefan pecked her lips and groaned a bit when Bonnie squeezed him. "Good, now I'm going to get back to doing what I love to do."

SBSBSBS

Strolling up to Bonnie's porch, swinging their joined hands Stefan smiled at his sweetie who wouldn't stop blushing.

"Do you want to stay the night?" Bonnie asked the second she inserted her key in the lock.

"I think it might be wise if I sleep in my own bed tonight. Otherwise, I can't be held responsible for what happens."

Bonnie swung back around to face Stefan. She draped her arms around his neck, leaned up on her toes, and kissed him until the inferno between them was roaring again. Teeth clasing. Tongues dueling, moans and gutturals noices passed between them. Bonnie's back crashed into the door and it was enough to jolt her back to the present. They really were acting like horny high school students who couldn't keep their hands off one another.

Stefan hastily licked his lips clean, savoring Bonnie's taste. "See what I mean?"

"I think I finally do. Okay no sleepover. I guess I'll just take a cold shower."

And that visual didn't help Stefan control the activity taking place in his pants. "And I'll just walk around with an ice pack around my crotch," he mumbled.

Bonnie chuckled and then very lightly pecked Stefan's lips and opened the door. "Thank you for tonight."

"My" Stefan kissed her cheek, "pleasure," then her forehead. "Sleep tight," and finally planted another searing kiss on Bonnie's lips.

Much sooner than expected Bonnie found herself standing alone on her porch with kiss swollen lips and a swimming pool between her legs. Stefan was going to be the death of her, Bonnie could sense it.

* * *

Running late was not Caroline Forbes' thing. Her life was one well-oiled machine but unfortunately the machine stopped working somewhere between one am and five this morning because her alarm clock didn't wake her up. Jamming a slice of jam toast between her lips and collecting her car keys, messenger bag, and jean jacket, she tossed opened the front door only to pause dramatically on the porch.

The piece of toast in her mouth fell to the ground and Caroline hastily removed any crumbs that might have accumulated around the corners of her lips.

Standing with his arms behind his back, Klaus Mikaelson offered Caroline a charming smile although his blue eyes mostly resembled chips of ice rather than warmth.

"What do you want?" she asked brusquely and shifted her weight on her feet.

"Is that anyway to treat a friend, Caroline?"

The blonde vampire in question scoffed. "Since when are you and I friends? I'm running late for school so unless you've come to say you're leaving I don't want to hear what you have to say."

"How is Tyler by the way?" Klaus asked knowing his renegade hybrid was her weakness, her Achilles Heel.

Caroline was proud of herself. She kept her face completely impassive. "I wouldn't know. I haven't seen or talked to him since my birthday," she tossed a glare his way.

Klaus smiled and Caroline knew without asking that he didn't believe her. She wouldn't be surprised if Klaus had ordered one of his other mindless hybrids to follow her and report back her movements. If that were the case she'd need to be even more careful than she was being. Klaus couldn't find out under any circumstances that Tyler had hidden himself away in the mountains of North Carolina trying to break his sire bond.

"Again, Klaus what do you want?"

The Original Hybrid looked away. "From my understanding Alaric the self-made hunter has returned. I'm assuming he's here to finish my mother's work, and if that's the case I've only come to tell you, you may need to buy yourself a black dress."

Caroline tensed. "Alaric isn't a problem. He's not a threat to you or to anyone else."

"Because you think the herbs your little witch friend has prescribed will keep his diabolical side at bay? You don't believe that anymore than I do, Caroline. You're much too smart for that."

"It doesn't matter what I believe but what I know. And I know that if you go after Alaric I will find someway to make you pay for that."

Klaus' smile stretched his face until his dimples were on full display. Her loyalty was charming but a bit irritating. Caroline could no more hurt him than a dagger, or fire, or vervain. He was impenetrable. Unstoppable. A force of nature himself.

"I think your reach has far exceeded your grasp, love if you think you can hurt me. I'm just giving you fair warning as a courtesy because, believe it or not, Caroline I do respect you, and your feelings about _certain _things." That certainly earned Klaus a snort. Yet he continued. "But if Alaric gets in my way or tries to hurt me or mine I _will_ kill him where he stands. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal," Caroline barked and straightened her spine.

"Have a good day at school."

Caroline didn't move a muscle until she watched Klaus walk off, whistling along the way.

* * *

**The following week…**

A timid knock sounded on his front door. Stefan looked up from the newspaper he had been reading, his brows drawing together quizzically. He wasn't expecting anyone, and was on his way out the door to meet up with Bonnie who had been suckered into decorating the gym for the next decade's dance.

Walking through the living room, Stefan opened the front door and fixed an impassive expression on his face. He folded his arms over his chest.

"Elena…what are you doing here?"

The girl in question didn't attempt to smile and even if she did she was positive the facial muscles necessary for the action wouldn't have worked. This was her first time being at Stefan's new home, and she couldn't have felt more unwelcomed only because he hadn't invited her to stop by. From the outside it reminded her of a smaller version of the boardinghouse.

Elena tucked a strand of hair behind her head. "Sorry for not calling first but I wanted to talk."

"Talk about what?"

"Can I come in?"

Although that was the last thing Stefan wanted he couldn't exactly ignore his upbringing. You were polite to ladies even if the lady wasn't worth your hospitality. Stepping aside, he allowed Elena into his fortress. He was curious to know how she found his place. More than likely she probably guilt tripped the information out of Matt because Stefan knew for a fact that Bonnie wouldn't have said anything, and if she did she immediately would have told him.

Just like Bonnie immediately called him after Elena stopped by her place to get the herbs for Alaric, and she found their pictures from the college tour. Stefan knew exactly why Elena was here, he just wanted her to admit out loud.

She didn't like the fact he had moved on, and apparently she didn't like who he decided to move on with.

Elena entered Stefan's new dwellings, her whiskey-colored eyes stretching to take in everything. It was very gauche, very him; it kind of made her smile but also sad because it wasn't until recently that Elena began to realize that she missed Stefan.

Not miss him in a boyfriend sense but in a friend sense.

Turning to face him, she stuck her hands in her coat pockets. "You have a really nice house."

Stefan merely inclined his head and then headed over to the leather couch. He sat down and Elena took that as her invitation to do the same. The two exes merely looked at everything except each other.

"So what did you want to talk to me about?" Stefan asked and finally brought his bluish-green gaze on Elena.

"I wanted to talk about you and Bonnie."

"That's none of your business."

Elena looked at Stefan sharply and then deflated. Essentially she knew she had no right to question him about his relationship, but she just wanted understanding of how her best friend and her ex could have hooked up. There had been a point where Bonnie used to tell her everything, even stuff she wasn't supposed to mention, and Elena had taken that kind of sacredness for granted thinking Bonnie would always be in her corner no matter what. But now that she was with Damon it was like things changed so dramatically, but Elena felt abandoned, left out in the cold. She understood why everyone was keeping their distance, but at the same time she didn't understand why everyone felt it was necessary to shut her out. She was still the same person—sort of—she was just dating someone new.

"Stefan…"

"No," the younger Salvatore cut her off. "You lost the right to know anything involving me on a personal level when you decided to be with Damon. He's your concern now, not mine. I'm with Bonnie. She makes me happy, and that's all you really need to know or understand about the situation. I didn't and don't plan on asking details about your love life, have the same respect for mine."

Elena stared at him for a moment, chin quivering. She quickly looked down and studied her hands. "I'm sorry."

"I know you are," Stefan intoned. "You're sorry about everything but it doesn't change or improve the situation." Pause. "You should go. I have somewhere I need to be."

Without another word, Elena rose from the couch and headed towards the door, but then she stopped and turned around.

"I know my decision to be with Damon hurt you, Stefan and that was the last thing I wanted to do. I know it might not seem like it, but I do want you to be happy."

Stefan got to his feet as well. "Your lips are saying those words but I know your heart is saying something completely different." He didn't continue speaking until he was standing right in front of Elena. "You've never been in this situation before…where someone would want to be with your best friend over you."

"No…Bonnie is…she…I want her to be happy. That's all I've ever wanted," the doppelganger argued.

"Really? Then why were you so upset when you found out about us?"

Elena looked down at the ground while furtively trying to collect her thoughts. "I was shocked because…because I know Bonnie's feelings about vampires, and I-I-I never thought she'd ever consider being with one. Being with you. It just surprised me, is all."

Stefan kept his intimidating stare locked on Elena. He might not be as inept to know when someone was lying, but he had perfected the art of reading Elena's body language. Right now she was wound so tight with one strong pluck she was liable to explode. She wanted to be seen as an understanding person, and that she truly wanted everyone close to her to be happy. But unfortunately she wanted to dictate the means in which someone was happy. He could be happy so long as he lived out the remainder of his immortality alone and pining over her. Bonnie could be happy so long as she found someone decent who wasn't an overall threat to their friendship.

There was a side to Elena Stefan had spent so much of his time living in denial about, but he could see it clearly now. Elena was selfish except she hid it under empty declarations of wanting fairness across the board. She wasn't as overt about it like her ancestor Katherine or her birth mom Isobel, but it flowed through her veins like milk and honey. Stefan couldn't deny that Elena had a good heart, her intentions were just sometimes appallingly wrong.

"So did you come here to try to dissuade me from being with your quote-en-quote best friend because of her attitude about vampires?" Stefan inquired. "If you honestly believe she hates my kind, then why is she friends with Caroline? Why has she helped me and Damon time after time again? She could have cut us all off but she didn't. So that argument is lame and you know it."

Elena shook her head and finally looked at him. "I can't pretend to know Bonnie like I used to but…I just never thought she'd…never mind."

"No, say it," Stefan prodded.

Shifting her weight on her feet, Elena sighed. "I never thought she'd be the kind of girl to hook up with a guy she knew one of her friends had been in love with."

Stefan said nothing for a while. He processed Elena's words. "Wow, I didn't think you had such a low opinion about your friend."

"It's not a low opinion," Elena refuted heatedly. "I'm just concerned that she's setting herself up to get hurt."

Stefan smiled then. "Because you think I'm only with her as a way to get back at _you_?"

Elena said nothing.

"My, how vain we are," the green-eyed vampire mocked. "Well let me say this to clear up any confusion you might still be having. I'm with Bonnie because I like her, and she likes me. End of story."

"Well…" Elena nodded her head and took a step back from Stefan. "I should go."

Stefan wasn't going to lift a finger to stop her. He watched Elena slip out of the front door.

* * *

**Mystic Falls High**

"No higher," Caroline directed.

"In case you haven't noticed I'm not Kareem Abdul-Jabar. My arm can't go any higher, Caroline," Bonnie gritted out between clenched teeth.

Rolling her cornflower blue eyes, Caroline stomped over to the ladder. "All right come down. I'll do it."

Dropping her arm with relish, Bonnie slowly began to make her way tentatively down the ladder. She had been hanging stars from the rafters in the gym for the better part of the morning, and she was itching to go. This was not how she envisioned spending her Saturday, but figured it might look good on her college transcript if she added being apart of the Hospitality & Entertainment Committee which Caroline thought sounded better and more modern than calling them by what they really were: decorators.

Once she was on the ground, Bonnie passed over the large cellophane star she had unsuccessfully tried to hang.

"So what are you and Stefan getting into today?" Caroline asked as she went up the ladder.

"I'm not really sure. He should be on his way here."

"To help?"

"I doubt that."

"Hmm…have you seen Alaric since you've given him his prescription?" Caroline chuckled lightly.

"I called him the other night to see how he was doing. He sounded…fine, but he could have been acting. Damon has taken it upon himself to sort of babysit Rick to make sure he doesn't wig out again. I still can't get over the fact his ring is responsible for all of this."

Caroline was back on the floor by the time Bonnie finished speaking. "It does sound strange that a piece of jewelry that's been spelled to keep him from becoming minced meat by a supernatural would alter his personality."

"I don't think it's the ring so much as him dying. What happens when he's dead? Where does his spirit go? There can only be so many times a person travels to the other side only to be ripped out before it starts to affect them."

Caroline nodded and then shrugged. She already died once and it wasn't an experience she was looking to repeat again.

"No more Klaus sightings?" Bonnie asked. She had been the first to know the Original had shown up outside of Caroline's house with a warning about keeping Rick in line. As if they weren't already aware of that. But Bonnie was sure Klaus just wanted to get his Caroline fix for the week, yet tried to disguise it as him pulling rank.

"No, thankfully," Caroline said in her typical dramatic fashion. "I still can't get over the fact he thinks he has feelings for me because he saved my life. The _nerve_."

Bonnie sniggered.

"I mean why do I seem to attract psychopaths?" Caroline lamented. "First Damon and now Klaus. Who's next Jason Vorhees?"

"Maybe that puppet thing from Saw," Bonnie teased. Caroline shot her an irritated look.

The two friends headed back over to command central which was really one of the picnic tables that held all the decorating and art supplies.

Just as Caroline was about to start another round of discussion she saw Elena enter the gym. "Don't look now but the doppelganger has arrived."

Bonnie looked over her shoulder and spotted Elena as she began talking with a fellow senior. She turned back around to face Caroline who couldn't exactly keep the glee off her face. If Caroline was thinking that she and Elena would throw down like a pair of hillbillies she was about to be heavily disappointed. Bonnie fought vampires who tried to eat people, not disgruntled best friends.

Whatever situation may have been liable to pop off was aborted when Stefan materialized out of nowhere, and wrapped his arms around Bonnie and kissed her neck.

Caroline was absolutely beaming.

"Hey," Bonnie maneuvered until she could see Stefan better. Since they became officially they had been extremely careful in limiting their displays of affection. But now that the cat was out of the bag, Bonnie had no qualms about kissing him, and so she did.

"Get a room," Caroline groaned good-naturedly and then flicked her eyes to Elena who quickly looked away. Although she figured this might make her a really bad friend, Caroline was a little giddy that Elena was experiencing what it felt like to watch your ex simper all over one of your friends.

Stefan didn't want to release Bonnie's lips but decided he had deprived her of oxygen long enough. Just the taste of her mouth reminded him what her other set of lips tasted like. He had to quickly switch his thoughts otherwise his pants would have gotten extremely tight in one area.

"What's up, Caroline?" Stefan finally greeted the blond vampire.

"I was just fine until my breakfast decided it wanted to make a special guest star appearance after witnessing you suck the life out of my friend. How are you?"

Stefan sat down on the bench beside Bonnie, linking their fingers together, tracing the contours of her face with his greedy orbs.

"I'm over here, Stefan."

Bonnie giggled as Stefan reluctantly made eye contact with Caroline. "I'm good now that I'm here with my girl. Unfortunately for you I have to steal her."

"Ah, no you don't. This gym is far from being time appropriate, and Bonnie is my second-in command. I need her here. So whatever shenanigans you have planned will just have to wait."

"I don't think so. Bonnie?" Stefan rose from the bench and held out his hand.

Bonnie looked at it, then at Caroline. "Sorry, Caroline. But now that Elena's here I'm sure she'd love to help."

Caroline visibly pouted. "Whatever. Just know when prom rolls around I'm going to make you pay." And then she stiffened because Damon entered the gym.

Both Stefan and Bonnie frowned at Caroline's sudden spooked look and directed their gaze over their shoulders. When they saw the cause of Caroline's uneasiness, they scowled.

"Whatever," Bonnie wrote Damon off like a bad check. "Stefan I'm ready."

The mute vampire merely nodded his head and took Bonnie by the hand. Unfortunately they would have to walk by Damon and Elena in order to exit the gym.

The elder Salvatore saw his brother walking briskly and stiffly in his direction, but his eyes lowered to take in the fact he was holding hands with the witch who shared Stefan's constipated look. Folding his arms over his chest, smug grin in place, Damon wondered if those two would continue to throw stones in a glass house. They could talk about _him _all they liked about him having no honor or scruples, but Bonnie was supposed to be the loyal one, and as a loyal friend to Elena she wasn't supposed to make a go for her ex.

This just proved to Damon that everyone was full of shit. "Stefan," he greeted his brother civilly enough.

Stefan strolled right past Damon as if he hadn't heard him.

"Witchy," Damon said to Bonnie's retreating back.

"Asshole," she replied and tossed him a bogus smile.

With them gone, Damon trained his eyes on his girlfriend and glowered at her. She looked far more affected than she should have.

* * *

**Later that night…**

_Something wasn't quite right. She wasn't supposed to be here, had vowed never to return to this place because of what happened. Despite her own trepidation, Bonnie began to place one foot in front of the other, drawing closer. _

_The sky overhead was gunmetal gray and everywhere her eyes landed she saw nothing but crows. Crows were omens of death. That made swallowing very difficult. _

_Snapping her eyes back towards the house looming in front of her, Bonnie felt her hackles rise. This was a haunted house with a hundred women's souls who had been burned to death, women like her. Witches. What should have sparked some anger over the controversy only made Bonnie want to head in the opposite direction, but something important happened here. Something she didn't want to remember but she needed to remember._

_The lawn was overgrown with browning and dead leaves everywhere. The house itself looked like it was declining into the earth being swallowed, being eaten. Perhaps that would be for the best. _

_Bonnie eyed the grime covered windows, the dead vines that clung to the pillars of the house like a disgruntled lover. She had spent three weeks of her life trapped beneath the rotted floorboards of this place, and here she was a year later about to…_

_She was now standing at the base of the porch._

_The steps were sturdy so she didn't have to watch her footing. The front door swung open without her having to turn the handle. Odd—considering the front door was usually shut tight and she hadn't been here in months nor anyone else that she knew of. And she certainly hadn't used her telekinesis right then, but she proceeded through the poorly lit foyer, running face first into cobwebs that had her cursing and jumping out of her skin. _

_Bonnie kept walking while brushing off the spider web. Something with eight or more legs it looked like scampered across the floor causing Bonnie to scream and ram her back into the nearest wall. She grabbed her pounding heart, closed her eyes, and admonished herself. _

"_Get it together," she said, licked her lips and proceeded to her destination._

_She slipped through the door which led to the basement. The floorboards protested loudly against her weight and she grew worried that she might slip through a plank and go crashing through the floor. That wouldn't be good if she got trapped here. No one knew she was here, and admittedly Bonnie had no idea why she was here to begin with either. However, instinct told her that she needed to be here and Bonnie always listened to her instincts._

_She quickly cleared the steps and rounded the corner and entered that room, the same room where she worked tirelessly to open that stupid coffin._

_The space was empty, devoid of another presence, but it was teamed with more cobwebs that hung like garland around the room. Melted candle wax covered the candelabras. _

_Her steps became less confident as Bonnie eyed a maroon colored stain on the floorboards. _

_There were angry red splotches all around, and she could easily tell that whoever was here put up a good fight yet unfortunately they lost because there was a large quantity of dried and coagulated blood on the floor._

_She gulped nervously and felt bile tickling the back of her throat. The smell was horrendous and she almost lost her nerve when she saw two field mice chewing on something that looked suspiciously like a human hand._

_All the blood rushed out of Bonnie and she nearly fainted. She pushed her feet forward and stood on the outer rim of a large pool of blood. Off to the side Bonnie saw a similar pool and as she did a revolution around the room, she realized there was blood on the walls, the wooden beams, the fireplace, the room was simply painted in blood._

_Then suddenly a figure began to emerge from one of the darkened corners of the room. Bonnie froze as the person sauntered into view, his pale white skin nearly blinding her against the semi-darkness that surrounded her._

_His entire chin was stained with so much dried blood it looked as if he had ingested oil. Black and purple veins marked his cheeks and his hairline that he reminded Bonnie of Edward Scissorhands. It was Stefan and he was naked from the chest up, a chest that was speckled with blood stains._

_Bonnie's heart was beating erratically. "Stefan?" _

_He didn't reply only held out his hand, palm facing the ceiling. Bonnie's eyes inspected what he was holding and she didn't understand. It was a coin._

"_I don't understand."_

_Where his eyes should have been there was nothing but black holes. "We didn't want to choose."_

_Bonnie frowned but dared not get any closer to Stefan. "Didn't want to choose what?"_

_Stefan's jaw widened and revealed rows and rows of razor sharp, pointy teeth. A horrific sound roared from his mouth. He flew at her and Bonnie could do nothing but scream._

Bonnie's eyes snapped open and she looked to her immediate left. The space beside her was empty, but then movement from the far left corner of her room startled her.

Snapping on the light, Bonnie blinked against the sudden brightness. There was a woman standing and staring at her.

"Your sisters need you, Bonnie."

Eyebrows knitting together in confusion, Bonnie licked her dry lips. "Who are you?"

The woman stepped out of the shadows and into the light. Bonnie's eyes widened in disbelief. "Esther."

The matriarch of the Mikaelson clan stood before her dressed as impeccably as ever. The last time Bonnie laid eyes on Esther was the night she tried to make her children mortal, and she had sent her and Abby off when her sons arrived looking to spill blood. But what was Esther doing in her bedroom? And what did her dream mean?

"What do you want with me?" Bonnie asked tremulously.

"To finish what I started a thousand years ago. To undo the pestilence I unleashed on the world."

"Last time you made an attempt my mother ended up being turned," the young witch practically growled. "I won't help you."

Esther's face remained impassive but Bonnie could see disappointment and then anger flare in the older woman's eyes. "Then you leave me no choice."

"Leave you no choice to do what?" alarm bells began to ring in Bonnie's ears.

Esther stepped but a hair closer. "He's not what you think he is, and in the end he'll prove that I was right."

Bonnie shook her head in confusion. She hated when the spirits talked to her in riddles. "Right about what?"

"Make your choice, Bonnie before it's made for you," and Esther's tone had been a touch above threatening.

Just as Bonnie made the conscious decision to crawl out of bed, Esther was gone.

Bonnie's eyes opened _again _and this time she catapulted upwardin bed. Frantically she looked around and nothing seemed out of place in her room. A soft sound snapped her head in its direction. Stefan was asleep beside her.

A chill ran down her spine. Sweat peppered her hairline. Her heart was a hammer inside her chest.

_He's not what you think he is, and in the end he'll prove that I was right._

Prove she was right about what? Bonnie had no clue, but inherently knew it wouldn't be good. Nothing ever was when the spirits wanted their way.

Chapter end.

**A/N: Not much I want to say about this chapter. It pretty much speaks for itself. Hope to get the next update out soon, but I can't make any promises. Thank you so much for reading, guys. Let me know what you think. Predictions about what's to come. I'm loosely following what's canon, and I mean loosely, but I'd still like to hear what you think may happen next. Well, until next time love you!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I'm sorry you guys that I've taken yet another hiatus from this story. But I'm back with an update! I've taken a different approach to starting off this chapter that's kind of reminiscent of Season 1. Just imagine this as Stefan's voice over, in the beginning. Enjoy!**

Disclaimer: These characters are the creative property of LJ Smith and The CW. No copyright infringement is intended.

* * *

_5 April 2011_

_I haven't done this in a long time. Written out my thoughts. Sat down long enough to compile a coherent record of everything that's happened since my last entry. I've been—busy. (Factor in a smile). Having a girlfriend, someone I'm responsible for has given me purpose once again. I guess, for argument sake, you can say I've never lost my purpose, only my way. The road was muddied for a while where there had been plenty of detours that led me to dead ends. I've wasted too much time combing through my failures, and now I've arrived at a point where I'm starting to like and accept who I am. Lexi would be proud._

_I'm still a vampire. That hasn't changed. I'm still Stefan Salvatore, brother to Damon Salvatore and that unfortunately won't ever change. But it's nice to wake up in the morning and not have the burning urge to drive a piece of wood deep into Damon's thorax. I've finally moved past the hurt and the anger in losing Elena, in witnessing the shift of her emotions from me to my brother. It's nice to be free of the questions that haunted and tormented me every single hour in why wasn't I enough for her. _

_I can't explain her reasoning for I don't know Elena's mind. Only she knew how she felt about Damon, and decided to follow her heart. It was something I told her repeatedly that she should do instead of trying to force her to make a decision. I rather be dumped than to be settled with because of an obligatory need not to step on any toes or ruffle any feathers, or simply because she met me first._

_As I write this I have reason and cause to be happy, to welcome the morning. In fact, I'm looking at my reason right now. _

_She's fast asleep, burrowed beneath the thick duvet to ward out the chill although her skin is always warm, warmer than warm, but shivers under my touch. She's a gift I dare not unwrap hastily. I want to enjoy her and in turn have her enjoy me. I want to get to know her, everything there is to know about her. _

_Mostly importantly I want her to know me. Bonnie is only consciously aware of who I am because of the parts I leak out. She knows little facts about me: my favorite color, books, music, movies, the fact that when I was a child I was terrified of thunderstorms because I was caught in one when I got lost playing around in the forest. _

_There was so much she didn't know, so much I wanted to confide in and tell her, but I'm not sure if now is the right time. Things are still new although we've been acquainted for close to two years, but during that time I had been elsewhere occupied. _

_She really is beautiful and I'm not just talking about her looks, but I can talk about those, too. Bonnie is petite in size, yet curvaceous and she fits under my arm perfectly. She has green eyes that in direct sunlight become hazel, and at night deepen to emerald. There's a beauty mark—I discovered—on her pinky toe that my tongue has been obsessed with. Bonnie always smells like a walking bakery, and I do lust after her blood. I think about its coppery taste, its potency, the weight of it splashing against my tongue before roaring down my throat. I shouldn't think about her like that, but I can't help it, and she doesn't ease my plight by extending her neck whenever I begin to kiss her. It's a silent invitation for a vampire to bite her._

_It's during those times I find it hard to suppress my nature. I feel my face change, my fangs cutting through my gums egging on the ache to feed. I know without having to actually taste that she is exquisite, and it is a little irritating that Damon got to taste her blood first even if the way he did it was horrific. _

_Bonnie doesn't know this, no one other than myself and Damon would of course, but he would make comments about Bonnie's blood knowing of its potential to send me off the sobriety wagon. "The best fucking blood I've ever tasted." "Instant erection inducing good." Such an asshole. And with the comments came the elaborate faces he was so fond of pulling to exaggerate or illustrate his point. Damon's a fiend of the worst kind and knew exactly which of my buttons to push. _

_I was powerless back then to do or say anything outside of "Shut the hell up", but now I was well within my right as Bonnie's boyfriend and her unofficial protector to put foot to ass. _

_She's innocent, strong, powerful, and I don't deserve her. But she makes me happy, and I don't want to lose her._

_Yet I do fear the day that my true nature will be revealed and it'll be too much for Bonnie. She'll take one look at me, run for the hills, but that would be after she brought me down to my knees, and…_

_Back to being alone. For now, I will enjoy our time together. I'll stand with her against our enemies, and I'll show her that just because I might be undead, that didn't mean I was "dead" in my heart or below my waist. _

* * *

Everything looked good on him. Oxford, pima cotton, sateen, flannel it didn't matter Stefan filled out his clothes. He wore them, they didn't wear him. Fabric shaped to his body like melted chocolate over decadent fruit. Stefan wasn't bodybuilder big. He had muscle tone in all the right places; his arms and chest cut as if forged by the finger of Zeus. Bonnie was convinced she could fry bacon and a slab of ribs on his abs alone. Sucking in her bottom lip, her tongue began to tingle. Bonnie remembered what happened last night. Her cheeks reddened and the lights inadvertently flickered.

Stefan snapped his head up and located her in the store. A devilish smile traipsed across his lips.

Constantly Bonnie heard the sales lady in the unisex fashion store where they were currently shopping, "ooh" and "aww" or quietly attempt to suck her teeth. Bonnie could be proud of the fact that her boyfriend's physique was admired by the opposite sex, but she didn't exactly like the thirsty look in the woman's eyes as she measured Stefan for his shirt.

Really, shouldn't a tailor and not a sales associate be doing this? Biting her tongue, Bonnie continued on her task of finding the right accessories to go with her black flapper dress. The 20's decade's dance was coming up in days. The dance would also mark her and Stefan's first major "appearance" since becoming a couple.

Nothing, outside of her boyfriend, caught her eye. She saw strands of pearls, rhinestone encrusted rings, bracelets, cuffs, and earrings galore, but none of it was time appropriate. Bonnie should have taken up Caroline's offer to drive out to the outlet stores in Williamsburg, Pennsylvania to find some one-of-a-kind jewelry pieces, but she had been unable to detach herself from Stefan long enough.

They wasted afternoons rolling around either in his bed or hers. Took long drives while holding hands, went on nature walks where Stefan would point out something Bonnie hadn't learned in a textbook, shared hot and heated kisses on what they had dubbed their bluff.

She was trying to fight it. Was trying to stave off the feelings and emotions that wanted to hoard themselves in every single heart valve she possessed. Some days Bonnie welcomed the feelings and other days she denied their existence. She was terrified of opening herself up like that again, and though in hindsight she and Jeremy never had deep conversations about their feelings, Bonnie thought they were on the same page in the way Jeremy would look at her, touch her, kiss her, worry about her.

Her relationship with Stefan was much different. Bonnie felt more mature. She felt like she was more than just a novelty. Hell, she just felt sexy.

Getting ready in the morning took more thought. Normally Bonnie would throw on a pair of jeans, a cute shirt, slip her feet into some boots or her sneakers, and she'd call it day. Now she carefully picked out her underwear making sure her bra and panties matched, and only the tightest of jeans would do as well as shirts that paid homage to her girls and flat stomach.

Since it was on her mind, Bonnie made her way to the lingerie section of the store and began searching through the racks.

Stefan had seen her in black, white, periwinkle, and purple lace. What about nude? She held up a frilly looking brassier with the matching boy shorts underwear. Bonnie scrunched up her nose and put it back. Coral? No. Cotton candy pink? Nope.

Red. Red was always a winner and Bonnie was sure that Cosmo swore by the color as it being the fastest way to get your man in the mood.

She blushed copiously feeling like an idiot and wholly inexperienced. Stefan was learning her body like a good student, eagerly anticipating each new lesson. He wasn't the only one being schooled. Bonnie was learning what she liked and didn't like as well.

Bonnie liked it when Stefan licked the back of her knee horizontally. She liked when he added pressure to her instep when he massaged her calf. He drove her nuts when he would circle her areola with the tip of his tongue instead of going right for the nipple. Bonnie adored whenever Stefan would dig his tongue deep into her navel, and the way his breath rushed from his nostrils and tickled her skin.

And his fingers, Bonnie shifted a bit as she felt that nub in her center begin to harden…they certainly knew how to tease and bring her to completion.

Stefan, on the other hand, wasn't very ticklish. Except for the space behind his ears, she discovered. Bonnie could make him curl up and purr like a kitten anytime she raked her nails across his scalp and down his back, and he loved it when she would grab a hold of his ass whenever they would begin to grind. He was simple, easy to please, and though she hadn't worked up the courage to return oral favors, Stefan was fine with hand jobs.

Bonnie thought back to when Stefan tried to convince her to give him a boob job. She simply wasn't ready for that.

However the downside to all this teasing was that it was making the young woman yearn for more.

"I like the red," his voice whispered into her ear, spooking her.

Bonnie jumped a little and then glared at him over her shoulder. His eyes were fixed on her, piercing, as he reached blindly for the two-piece set Bonnie had been assessing just moments ago.

"Don't you want to try it on for me?" he asked innocently but the look Stefan was giving her was far from innocent.

"You're done being measured?" Bonnie changed the subject.

"I'm ready for my next measurement and I must say there is definite expansion taking place as we speak."

"Horn dog," the young witch criticized. "There's more to life than just _that_."

"Oh, I know," Stefan sighed. "But the world has enough people worrying about its problems that I rather just focus my energy on you, and seeing you in this hot little number. It would make me immensely happy," he grinned like a little boy.

Bonnie's eyes roamed downward. "You're already happy."

"Good observation," the caramel-haired vampire praised. "It'll be my treat. I think I ripped your favorite Victoria Secret bra the other night with my…um…enthusiasm."

"You ripped it off like it caught on fire or something. I still have welts, you know."

"My saliva has healing properties so I can lick them and make them all better."

"That tongue of yours has done quite enough, dude," Bonnie said and then pushed Stefan out of the way with her hip as she moved over to the shoes. She had enough heels and sneakers to last a lifetime, but it never hurt just to look.

Stefan followed and watched his girlfriend pick up a dangerously sky high pump, twist it that way and that before deciding to place it back on the display shelf.

This was something normal. Something couples did. Shopping. And what they were shopping for didn't entail stakes, grimoires, hidden relics, ingredients to spells, and the like. Stefan would say he's far from being a fashion enthusiast, but he knew having these moments were important to Bonnie. What was important to her he made important to him. So he didn't mind when Bonnie would pull out the big guns by looking at him with those chartreuse eyes, and poke out her bottom lip and suggest they do something she'd normally do with her girlfriends. It had been his goal to live as a human, and he knew that human males were oftentimes dragged out to retail stores with their wives, girlfriends, better halves, holding purses and carrying bags.

He loved it.

Bonnie spun around to face him as if she just remembered something. "I forgot to tell you."

"What?"

"I got an acceptance letter today," she beamed.

"Really? From which college?"

"Whitmore."

Stefan remembered it because he had accompanied Bonnie, Caroline, and Matt on the college tour. Whitmore wasn't terribly far from Mystic Falls, but it was far enough that one could almost convince themselves they left the state of Virginia for good. However, hearing that name and remembering the story the tour guide shared about the burned down infirmary didn't exactly make Stefan want to jump for joy. There was just something about that place that activated his flight or fight mechanism. Maybe it was just the predator in him that had a slight abhorrence to Bonnie's prospective college.

Instead of looking like a Debbie Downer, Stefan pasted on his happiest smile as he rushed Bonnie, picked up her, and spun her around. He buried his face in her hair and kissed her deeply on the neck. He drooled a little bit because the scent of her blood was intoxicatingly strong, and he hadn't had a blood bag today. Whenever they were together, Stefan always tried to fortify himself so he wouldn't be tempted to bite Bonnie. He was being slightly reckless right now especially knowing what the scent of her blood did to him.

He greedily licked his lips and increased the pressure of his mouth against her skin. Bonnie squirmed a bit wanting to be put down because she was consciously aware of the fact they were beginning to gain attention she didn't necessarily want.

"Stefan," Bonnie laughed nervously while trying not to give into the pleasurable sensation of Stefan making out with her neck. "Ooh," she moaned, "Stefan, come on people are starting to stare."

"Just a second," came his mumbled reply. "I'm proud of you, baby."

"Thank you, but you can tell me that with my feet planted firmly on the ground, and without my neck in your mouth."

Stefan ignored her and swirled his tongue in a figure eight right over her jumping pulse.

"Seriously, Stefan," Bonnie dug her nails into his shoulders knowing it wouldn't be enough to dislodge him.

"Okay," Stefan delivered one final lick that began from her clavicle and ended at the corner of her bow-shaped lips. Reluctantly he placed her feet on the ground and stepped away from her. A delicious crimson hue colored her cheeks, the tip of her nose, even her chin. He groaned low in his throat and had to do some clever adjusting in his pants, and slow his breathing.

This was getting out of control. Bonnie was one walking temptation and didn't even know it.

"I'm sorry," he said once he got his blood to cool down.

Bonnie fanned herself. "It's nice to know I'm wanted, but can we try to keep a lid on it when we're out in public."

"Sure," Stefan easily agreed. He cleared his throat. "So you were accepted into Whitmore. Have you told your dad?"

"I called and left him a message. He had his heart set on me going to Carolina, his Alma Mater, but I don't have the grades or the extracurricular activities. Carolina is a good school, but it didn't have any major I wanted to study. I talked to Professor Langston. Remember when I told you about her?"

Stefan nodded. Professor Zora Langston had been a former student of her Grams.

"She's invited me to this luncheon she throws at the end of the semester for her top students. I haven't given her an answer, but it might be time. I think Whitmore might be it for me. I'd be carrying on Grams legacy by going. I'm still waiting to hear back from the two other schools I've applied to, but right now I'm putting all my money on Whitmore."

"Well, I fully support anything you want to do." Even if what she wanted to do made him slightly uncomfortable, but Stefan was an avid believer in not staunching anyone's right to choose. It was a lesson he learned the hard way when he convinced Damon to turn when he wanted to die.

"So…" Bonnie hedged.

"So…" Stefan parroted.

"You didn't apply anywhere?"

Taking her by the hand, Stefan began to lead Bonnie out of the store. "No. I have three bachelor degrees already."

Bonnie didn't know that and let it register on her face. "You have three bachelor degrees? From where and what in?"

Stefan tipped his head back trying to think. "Let me see. I have an English degree from Gardner-Webb University, Journalism from University of Maryland, and a History degree from William & Mary."

Bonnie was impressed but confused, "And you're in high school because…?"

"I know," Stefan tossed up a hand sheepishly. "Call me Edward," he shook his head. "Unfortunately I share that sparkling vampire' s logic. The younger I start out at a place, the longer I can stay."

"I understand that, but why not get a job as a journalist, or teacher, or something?" Bonnie continued with her inquisition.

They were headed to the food court where Stefan had promised her a DQ Oreo blizzard. The line was wrapped around the place.

That had been the plan, until Stefan popped up in Mystic Falls to visit Zach, spotted Elena, saved her life, began to follow her to make sure she wasn't Katherine, fell in love with her doppelganger ass, and now here he was about to purchase ice cream for his girlfriend who was a witch that not too long ago couldn't stand the sight of him. It was amazing how fast life and plans could change.

"I could have," Stefan replied. "However, do I really look old enough to wear tweed and stand before today's impressionable youth, and say that reading everything Shakespeare, Poe, and Hemingway will not help them at all later in life? Best not to kill the fantasy."

"I guess I see your point."

"And I see you wearing that red lingerie set," he winked.

"Just let it go, Stefan," Bonnie shook her head fighting her smile.

"Only on one condition, I buy it, and then I get the pleasure of peeling you out of it."

Bonnie wanted to tap her foot on the ground. "Fine, but _after _I get my blizzard. My body is ready," she said dramatically and tilted her head back.

Stefan swiped his tongue over his bottom lip, "I certainly hope so."

Laughing, Bonnie wrapped her arms around Stefan's neck. His went around her waist pulling her flush.

"We're going to have fun at the dance, right? Caroline has practically mandated it."

"There's one high school tradition I wish I was exempt from," the hundred and sixty-two year old vampire lamented.

"Get over it," Bonnie said unsympathetically. "Remember no one held a gun to your head and told you to enroll in high school."

"Yeah, don't remind me. I want the night to be perfect. The last couple thousand dances we've attended ended with someone's death. No one dies this weekend."

"I second that. No one dies. It'll be a perfect night. And afterwards…" Bonnie played with the lapels of Stefan's button down.

His dark eyebrows lifted in curiosity. "Yes?"

Leaning to stand on her tiptoes, Bonnie whispered something in Stefan's ear that made him groan, chuckle, and take her lips in a heated kiss.

"I'm _definitely _holding you to that, Bon."

"I would expect nothing less."

* * *

Alaric Saltzman's blue eyes followed the vampire who had, for lack of a better word, imprisoned him in his own apartment as he paced back and forth, cell phone pressed against his ear while he tried to renegotiate the turns of his "release".

He had been on his best behavior for the last three weeks, faithfully taking the bitter herbs witch doctor Bonnie Bennett had prescribed, which meant his alter hadn't made any guest star appearances that would warrant his continued imprisonment. His pardon was long overdue in Alaric's opinion even if he was supposed to be keeping a low profile in light of his recent descent into homicidal behavior. The sheriff couldn't be alerted to his presence in Mystic Falls, but Alaric was going stir crazy staring at the walls of his apartment and having his social circle diminish to _only _talking to Damon, Elena, and Jeremy.

In reality, Alaric should have been used to it, but it was like taking in a breath of fresh air to be able to converse with Meredith—prior to him killing her ex-boyfriend, and of course interacting with his students who continued to astound him with their overt laziness when it came to writing papers and critical thinking responses on his tests. Alaric couldn't dumb down his assignments enough, and was still presented with elementary mediocrity that it was laughable and drove him even deeper into the bottle.

"Right…unless you know of where another white oak tree is, I think we're all in the clear," Damon's voice interrupted Alaric's reverie. He really began to listen now at the mention of the words: white oak tree. "Do I think his leash should be loosened?" the dark-haired vampire looked Ric over as the corners of his mouth turned down. "He seems harmless enough for a human."

Alaric rolled his eyes and went back to not reading the book that was open on his lap.

"She's on the way over last I heard." Pause. "How do I think this can continue? I don't know. How does eternity sound to you?" Damon questioned and then listened. He snorted and continued his pacing. "I'm not trying to find anything out the hard way either, and we've all had our asses handed to us in the past for underestimating someone." Pause. "Care to know what I think? You're scared. No, I'm not trying to insult you. I mean, what's the point in being immortal if no one is out to kill you." Pause. "Look, the only way you're going to know is if you see for yourself. It's your call. All right. Fine."

Damon hung up the phone and pocketed it. He swiped his glass of whiskey off the kitchen island and drained it before dumping his weight in an overstuffed chair. He kicked his boots up on the table and stared at his only male friend in the world.

"So what's the verdict?" Alaric slapped the book closed and tossed it aside.

The elder Salvatore shrugged a shoulder. "Klaus still doesn't trust you and he doesn't think rehabilitation can be achieved in only three short weeks. Sorry, mate, you're going to be grounded a little while longer."

Alaric groaned impatiently. "This is bullshit you know that, right? I have control of myself. I don't have any urges to kill vampires so keeping me locked up here is a waste of everyone's time."

"I would tend to agree with you, but…" Damon didn't finish his thought because he felt he didn't need to.

Resting his elbows on his knees, Alaric slid to the edge of the couch, peering at Damon. "You've been over here every single day…"

"Which is a drag on my schedule. I do have a girlfriend now that demands a lot of attention," he wiggled his dark eyebrows.

Alaric shook his head. It never slipped his mind, and Damon never passed up the opportunity to gloat about the fact he was now the vampire decorating Elena Gilbert's arm. The former history teacher had an arsenal of arguments lined up on why Elena shouldn't have any kind of involvement with Damon, the first being he was the _brother _of her previous boyfriend, and then of course there was the age gap between them, and not to mention the fact Damon was a bloodsucking vampire with serious self-esteem and impulse control issues, but who was keeping track of that?

Alaric never held his tongue, never censored his disapproval that Elena should surround herself with much better company. He would be the first to admit that when your life was about to end, having a trusty vampire around was useful, but other than getting one out of a jam, vampires were scum.

Self-preservation wouldn't permit him to say those things aloud and especially not in present company. Alaric had stopped being afraid of Damon a long time ago. He was privy to his weaknesses and could use them against the vampire any time he chose. For now, he would play along, show everyone that he was his old self and wasn't a threat to anyone.

But he would always be on the lookout for an opportunity.

"How does it feel?" Ric inquired.

Damon tilted his head to the side in contemplation. Admittedly it felt amazing. To finally be able to be with the woman that made his undead heart resume its beat. However, as good as things were there was still a shadow that hung over Damon's head. And this shadow would take on the shape of his brother. He would never lower himself to come out and say that he was sorry he had to sacrifice his relationship with Stefan just to be with Elena, but Damon was…it made him uncomfortable to know that he had been cast out of his brother's life just to be happy.

"If you're waiting for me to say it's like heaven on earth," Damon began, "its close but no cigar. I know in some form or fashion Elena will always love Stefan, and I don't have a problem with that. She loves me, too."

"You're just afraid that things between you and she won't last?"

Damon stared at Ric sharply. "As long as she's alive and I'm alive, things between us will never end, they'll never be finished."

_Yeah, tell yourself anything to cope with fate, _Alaric thought but didn't say. He merely nodded his head and grinned like he was happy his "buddy" finally got the girl.

A knock sounded on the door drawing the hunter and vampire's attention.

"Stay put," Damon ordered as he flashed over to the door and then opened it.

Standing on the welcome mat was Bonnie Bennett right on time to make her drop. Damon leaned against the door and presented a lazy smile which earned him a particularly scathing look from the caramel witch.

"Witchy," Damon greeted knowing how Bonnie detested the colorful and sometimes derogatory nicknames he made up for her.

"Is Alaric here?"

"Where else would he be? I've compelled him not to move a muscle out of his apartment. Did you bring snacks?"

Bonnie sighed because she was never in the mood to deal with Damon and especially when he was in what he would call a playful mood. "Either let me in and stop talking or better yet just stop talking."

Alaric laughed but attempted to cover it up with a fake cough. Damon glared at him over his shoulder before moving out of the way to allow Bonnie entry into the apartment.

The last time Bonnie stepped foot in this place was after her breakup with Jeremy. She had delivered Elena's necklace which turned out to be Esther's talisman, a talisman that had been key in closing the door to the other side. The young witch remembered Alaric awkwardly trying to comfort her by saying that Jeremy was young and young guys made stupid mistakes. Bonnie was well aware of how dim-witted and ignorant teenaged guys could be, that didn't mean she wanted to pour her heart out to her history teacher, definitely not when said history teacher was Jeremy's unofficial guardian, and might be biased.

"Hey, Alaric," Bonnie busied herself with digging in her purse to retrieve the fresh bag of herbs.

Alaric rose from the couch and intercepted the bag. "Thanks."

Damon's phone rang. "Shit, I forgot I have to do something…for Elena. I'll be back later."

The teacher and witch said nothing as Damon made a hasty retreat out of the apartment.

Being alone with Alaric made Bonnie's hackles rise but she tried to play off her discomfort. They had never been particularly close, had been cordial and respectful to one another, and Bonnie never felt like she had to watch her back when she was alone with Ric.

Suffice to say things were different now. Something dark and dangerous lingered in her teacher's psyche and everyone was depending on her to make sure he stayed balanced, mellow. Everyone aside from Damon that is who was just waiting for her brand of psychiatric treatment to fail. Bonnie was holding her breath as well. The herbs would lose their effectiveness as his body would naturally begin to build up a defense against them just like it would if he were popping prescription pills. Bonnie just didn't know how long their grace period would last.

"You don't have to look so nervous, Bonnie," Ric moved into the kitchen to get his first dose out of the way, and to prove he was in fact taking those herbs religiously. "I don't have fangs so I'm not going to bite."

Yeah he could do a multitude of other things. Bonnie knew there was a stash of weapons hidden within this apartment and that Alaric knew where they were.

Instead of letting her mounting unease show, Bonnie smiled but remained close to the door. "How have you been?" she asked. "I can't imagine it's been easy being cooped up here all the time."

"It hasn't been so bad. I consider this a much needed vacation since I've been chasing my ass non-stop for the last two years."

Bonnie watched as Alaric dumped the appropriate amount of herbs into green tea. He discovered it was easier to get them down with green tea instead of water which usually sent his gag reflex on a tizzy.

The taut muscles in her body refused to budge until Alaric had gulped down a third of his drink. For right now, she should be in the clear of him having an episode.

"Has Damon been a good warden?" Bonnie said to make conversation.

Ric made a restless motion with his shoulder. "He's leaves a lot to be desired," his blue eyes trailed over the young girl. It was plain to see Bonnie was uncomfortable being alone with him. Deep down he was pleased with that. "We never really talked much…the two of us, I mean. You're Elena's best friend…although I've heard through the grapevine that not all is well with you guys." Pause. "You're with Stefan now."

Bonnie's spine went ramrod straight. "And by grapevine you mean Damon?"

"He is my gossiping twin," Alaric smiled. "I gotta admit I was surprised to hear that you're with a vampire."

"Why does that shock you?"

Alaric took another sip of his drink and pulled his lips back from his teeth. "Well, for starters you never made it a secret you don't trust vampires, and I don't blame you for that. They'll use anyone to get what they want, and the minute they have it, poof you're history. Pun intended. I just never thought you'd lower yourself to be with one."

Bonnie's nostrils flared and she took a gigantic step forward. "Lower myself?"

Alaric pretended to choke on his drink. He cleared his throat. "What I meant was lower your standards. I'm sure Stefan is a great catch, but he was madly in love with Elena, and before that he dated her ancestor. If he isn't the poster child of carrying a torch for the same girl…well other than Damon, then I don't know who is. I just always figured you'd want to be with someone who didn't have any emotional ties to your friends. But I've been wrong before."

Bonnie didn't know what game Alaric was trying to run, but she was officially not playing.

Alaric walked around the kitchen island and took up his post on the couch once more. He could see the wheels turning in Bonnie's head.

"After everything that happened with Jeremy I thought…"

"You've had a lot of thoughts about this, Alaric. Clearly you have an opinion on who I've decided to be with, but with all due respect it's none of your business," Bonnie retorted.

Ric smiled. "Of course. I'm sorry if my observations hit a sore spot. All things considered."

"What does that mean?"

"I don't think you want to know. I'm just trying to look out for you, Bonnie."

"Sure you are because we've always been that tight," the young woman rolled her eyes.

"You're doing your part in keeping my head off the chomping block, the least I can do is return the favor."

Bonnie crossed her arms over her chest. "Well, anytime someone tried to do me a favor I ended up getting hurt so I'll just live in suspense this time."

"It's your call, but I just want to commend you for overcoming the fact Stefan is part of the reason your mother is a vampire. I don't think I could have done it…be with the vampire that was sent out to kill me—"

Bonnie blinked and frowned. "What? What are you talking about?"

Alaric graced Bonnie with an "oops" expression. "Nothing."

"No, you're trying to say something without having to say it while being an asshole in the process."

Alaric studied Bonnie for a moment while he tapped his fingers on the back of the couch. "How much do you know about that night…the night Abby was turned?"

This topic of discussion was not a favorite of Bonnie's. Already her chest was tightening up and she wanted to be anywhere but here, yet the can of worms had been pried open, and they were squirming and wiggling everywhere to make their grand escape.

"I know enough," Bonnie said. "I don't want to talk about this. I mean, what else is there to know?"

Plenty, Alaric thought as he recalled the night Damon got plastered and found his way over to his humble abode and purged everything that had been bothering him in _this _century. Damon had complained about the burden of being the bad guy when really he had been looking out for his brother when he took it upon himself to kill Abby after Stefan lost the coin toss on which dashingly handsome brother would end Bonnie's life. After it happened, neither one bothered sticking around to explain to Bonnie how it was decided her mom would be the one sacrificed to ensure Elena's longevity.

Best to let the little lady know what a real prize she had in Stefan Salvatore. It was his civic duty not only as an educator, but as a hunter to protect the innocents of Mystic Falls.

Or to start anarchy.

"The Salvatore brothers didn't want to be the one to sever Esther's access to the Bennett line so they decided by coin toss who would do the deed. Stefan lost. He was the one who was supposed to kill you that night, per Elijah's orders. Abby just ended up being collateral damage because Damon was trying, in his own misguided way, to protect his brother. They had no problem turning their back on you despite everything you've done for them, Bonnie. They were more concerned with how their decision would affect Elena…not you."

Alaric watched as Bonnie's face, her entire demeanor crumble. Oops again, he sniggered internally.

"I…thought you knew," Alaric mumbled quietly.

Tears danced in the bottom of Bonnie's eyes. Stefan lied to her. He made it seem like it was Damon's idea and he was just going along with it. He never once opened up his mouth and came out and _told _her that _he _was supposed to kill her. That _she _not Abby had been the one hand selected to die. That Damon intervened and killed Abby as a way of looking out for _Stefan's_ fragile sanity. Bonnie had been under the impression all this time that Stefan was only supposed to stall her so that Damon could turn Abby. Yet all along it had only been _her _and Stefan was supposed to be her executioner.

Stefan was supposed to kill her.

Stefan whom she was falling in love with was supposed to end her life.

Stefan who lost a coin toss…

Coin toss. Esther. That dream. He's not what he seems. He'll show you who he really is. Except he didn't show her. Alaric did.

"You're lying!" Bonnie spat in spite of her rapidly beating heart and the missing pieces collectively falling into place. "Did Elena or Damon put you up to this?"

"Nice to know you have such high opinions of your friends," Alaric remarked dryly.

"Damon is not my friend. He's your charity case!"

"Touché," Alaric conceded. "I wish I were lying, Bonnie, but I'm not. I'm sorry this hurts you, but it's best you know the truth instead of really falling for Stefan and having this come out much too late. He's supposed to be the 'good' brother, but Stefan would sell anyone out if it means protecting Elena. It's always going to be Elena."

Bonnie blinked her tears away, felt the world tilt dangerously on its axis. All the blood in her body rushed to her head making her dizzy and there was nothing for Bonnie to grab a hold on to, to steady herself. Her mouth was hot, her throat dry, and bile began to gyrate in her belly. She didn't want to believe Alaric; she didn't want to remember what Esther said to her in that nightmare. Her heart didn't want to endure this. It was happening all over again. The betrayal; only this was far worse than being cheated on by a ghost.

Imagines of Stefan with his chin covered in blood and those rows of razor sharp teeth rushed to the forefront of her mind, and she closed her eyes to block them out. All her past insecurities of never being good enough burst like a Geyser, and Bonnie was three years old, standing in the front yard watching her mom drive away and never come back. Then she was sitting on the bleachers at the school dance waiting for her crush to notice her, and when he finally walked over it was to ask _Elena _for a spin out on the floor.

Abby left her because of _Elena. _She lost her grandmother because _Elena_ rushed into the tomb to get Stefan and was nearly trapped inside. Her mom was killed and turned into a vampire in order to save _Elena's _life, and now Stefan…

"I have to go," Bonnie pivoted in her sneakers and stormed out of the apartment.

"Thanks for stopping by," Alaric said the second the door slammed shut.

* * *

Bonnie drove like a madwoman over to Stefan's house. She wanted answers. She didn't want to believe that Stefan could start a relationship with her knowing he had lost a fucking coin toss to kill her, and never once said anything about it. Never gave her the option of knowing the full truth of what happened that night, and letting her decide if she wanted anything farther to do with him. No. He kept quiet about it, brushed it under the rug in the hopes the truth would never be exposed.

_It's always going to be Elena._

She laughed humorlessly. Here she had been prancing around town, feeling happy and rejuvenated after spending so much time going through the motions of life because she found someone she clicked with. Found someone who put her first, her needs, her happiness, her desires. But this whole time he had been setting her up, lying to her, mocking her with his attention and affection when he knew deep down, had Damon not been there, she would have been pushing up daises.

How could Stefan do that? If what Alaric said was the truth then it wouldn't have been a stretch for Stefan to act like he gave a damn about her. He was so good at pretending. The perfect masquerader. The good brother.

Bonnie couldn't have felt more like a fool.

Slamming on the brakes, throwing the car into Park, Bonnie climbed out of her vehicle and marched through the front door.

Stefan wasn't in the living room and she didn't hear him rummaging around in the kitchen, so she took the stairs two at a time until she reached his bedroom.

He was sitting up against the headboard reading. With the twitch of her powers Bonnie sent the book flying out of his hands and across the room.

Stefan looked up, the beginnings of a smile overtaking his face, but his lips flattened into a hard line once he saw the undisguised hatred marring Bonnie's veneer.

"Baby what's—," he didn't get to finish his sentence as Bonnie slammed something down on the end table. It was a quarter. Stefan looked at her quizzically.

"Is that how much my life means to you?" Bonnie pointed accusingly at the silver coin. "Twenty-five cents or did you and your gotdamn brother use a nickel, a penny, to decide I had lived long enough and it was time for me to go?"

Dread plummeted in Stefan's belly. He attempted to slide out of bed, but found himself unable to do so. Bonnie was using her powers to keep him put. Nervously, Stefan licked his lips as he thought double time on how best to diffuse this situation. He knew this day would come but he just hoped it wouldn't have come so soon after he found peace and happiness again. The younger Salvatore didn't need a psychic to tell him that Bonnie would never trust him again after this day.

But this question plagued him: Who the fuck told her?

"Bonnie, please I can explain…"

"You better," she growled as a tear rolled down her cheek. "Is it true, Stefan?" her voice softened showing her vulnerability. "Were you supposed to kill me that night? Did you lose a coin toss and…" the words got lodged in Bonnie's throat. "It was supposed to be you?"

Seconds ticked off the clock. Stefan wanted to lie. Wanted to deny it. But he couldn't. He hated keeping such a massive secret from Bonnie, yet he did it because he knew it would lead to this moment.

"Yes," he mouthed nearly inaudibly, and hung his head in shame. "It was my job to kill you."

Job? So she had been regulated to being a _job_? Not a person with feelings, emotions, a soul. Someone he knew. A friend. What shred of hope that was left in Bonnie's soul had been crushed, blown to smithereens.

_**WHACK!**_

Stefan's cheek was red, stinging, and burning.

Bonnie rubbed her sore palm. "It's over. I don't want to see you ever again. Don't call me. Don't talk to me. Leave. Me. Alone."

"Bonnie it wasn't as cut and dry as that…"

"No, it was Stefan! Why didn't you tell me? Did you think I couldn't handle the truth? Is our relationship based off some bet you have going with Damon on how best to ruin my life…"

"NO!" Stefan roared and attempted to get off the bed and found he could do so. He was on his feet and stood before Bonnie who instantly jerked away from him. "Damon has nothing to do with how I feel about you. I…what I did, what I allowed to happen was fucked up, and I wanted to tell you, started to tell you so many times but I didn't want to hurt you, I didn't…" Stefan struggled to find the right words to explain his decision making blunder. He sighed. "I knew the second I told you that you'd hate me, and that I'd lose you. So I didn't say anything but I should have. I'm so sorry."

Bonnie swallowed reflexively. "What do you want from me, Stefan? Are you only with me because of what happened to Abby or your guilt because it had been your_ job_," she said snidely, "to kill me?"

"That's not why I'm in this. That's not why I want to be with you."

"Then why?" Bonnie felt like she was grasping at straws.

Stefan knew if he said what was on the tip of his tongue to say he'd be taking a risk. Bonnie might believe him or she might not believe him. He couldn't go back and change the past. He couldn't take back his part in what happened to Abby, in what he _almost_ did to Bonnie.

"Why are you with me, Stefan?"

"I'm with you, Bonnie because…" he stopped. Someone was knocking on his door.

Bonnie had been holding her breath and sensed that Stefan's revelation whatever it might have been was being put on pause. He was listening to something she couldn't hear. Her irritation grew and spread.

"I'm sorry. Caroline is here. Just please," Stefan implored, his bluish-green eyes begging for Bonnie not to give up on him just yet. "Please don't go anywhere."

He disappeared downstairs while Bonnie internally made him disappear from her heart.

Chapter end.

**A/N: Please put down the rocks, let's not stone me, lol. The truth about what really happened that night was going to come out eventually and I wanted it to happen before Stefonnie got really intimate with one another. Have faith I know where I'm going with this. Alaric was a real manipulative bastard this chapter and there's a purpose for it. I'm going to be taking liberties with mythology and you'll see why when the next update comes which hopefully won't take another three months. (Again, I apologize for making you wait so long between updates). My memories of 3x15 are fuzzy, but from what I could remember things were kind of vague involving the coin toss and if only Bonnie or both her and Abby were supposed to be killed that night. For this story I'm going with the explanation Alaric gave to Bonnie; that she alone was supposed to die. Well, kittens I'm off to give my brain a rest. Until next time, love you.**


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